Cadi

Hi thersites, First up, bear in mind that YWS strips out all the indenting of your paragraphs, so to make things a bit less text-wall, it helps to put in ...

Hi Crescent, So, some hours after I opened this tab from chat, I finally got un-distracted enough to read it - and I'm really glad I did! This is a ...

Hi, Misfit, and welcome to YWS! Now, this is a very interesting idea here - I saw you've posted a second chapter of it, but I've not taken a look ...

Hey, Laur, First of all, I'd like to say that this is really good. Your characters are believable, and you've set up the main plot points well. I particularly like ...

Hey midnightsky, I'm definitely intrigued by this piece - as a standalone, it raises a handful of questions, and if you're intending to make it part of something longer, it ...

Hi, Fizz. This piece has some real gems of imagery, but I feel like they're a little buried at the moment, and there are a few things you could do ...

Hi, Fizz. This piece has some real gems of imagery, but I feel like they're a little buried at the moment, and there are a few things you could do ...

The beginning of this piece is quite brilliant. The first paragraph introduces us to some nice weirdness, dropping the oncoming apocalypse into an otherwise normal situation. The announcement is unexp

Hey nutmegan, First up, I love the concept behind this piece. Emotion drugs are a very interesting concept, and there is a lot of room for you to play with ...

Hey Styxs, I have to say, I'm intrigued by this blob. Do you have plans for a longer story based on this? I think you could definitely build on it ...

The first thing that hits me when I read through this is that you're changing tenses, not only within the story but within a single paragraph. You've start in the ...