Bickazer

His words continued to fade. Everything was gone in an instant. Everything they fought for. \ I think there should be a "had" after the "they". Blood gushed out his ...

First to review (I hope; I'm a bit slow when it comes to reviewing)~ The bus pulled out from behind me and out of the school compound as I stared ...

First things first--I noticed plenty of punctuation errors. The most prominent one had to do with dialogue. Por ejemplo, this sentence: “sorry, I didn’t mean to hurt you. I haven’t ...

Prepare for nitpicky line-by-line-ness (well, as much as I can do before I take a shower). There was silence in the car. This sentence is a tad awkward: "there was" ...

Prepare for a very nitpicky line-by-line review. >_> Sorry, I really don't know how to review any other way. Quite honestly, it deserved the rest The "quite honestly" is superfluous ...

This is a fascinating idea; I'll be the first to say that. In particular, I love your first paragraph. I love how it unapologetically drags us straight into the universe, ...

Sorry for the kinda-late review...and the worst thing is, I wasn't even that busy. >_> I just...didn't feel much like reviewing until now. There were only six board members present, ...

Cool! You made a new one *coughfinallycough*! Er, ignore the last part. Work at your own pace, you know... Here comes a review filled with tiny nitpicks. Sorry. >_> A ...

I'll do what I've never done before with this story and do a line-by-line. :( Sorry, but...I find it MUCH easier to do it this way. That way I don't ...

Hmm, seems intriguing. Do you happen to have a fondness for dictionary defintions? Anyway, prepare for a truly MONSTROUS review. I like to go line-by-line and theeeen write a general ...

I'd critique this, but everyone else has already made their points and I agree completely (particularly when it comes to names...) That being said, I have one thing to say ...

Here I go. it was morning. I'd say "it" should be capitalized but more than that, I think this first sentence should be scrapped completely. You never, NEVER want to ...

Okay, here I go~! Sister Margeret brought out an old looking book from beneath her cloak and handed it over to Sister Innet. You don't need the "old looking" there...just ...

Sorry for the late review. My life got consumed by studying and so on...:( But I'm here now! So... First of all--awesome ending. You really seem to be building up ...

La la~! I felt guilty about not reviewing any of your stuff after you've given so many helpful reviews to Zenith, so...here I am! Great story, I loved it. Which ...