Azila

This is a pretty nice little piece of fiction! Of course, it was too short to really critique in full, but here are my thoughts: The writing style is very ...

That was really sweet! I don't have anything to crit. :lol: For some reason, the italics weren't italicised (they just showed [ i ] or [ / i ] only ...

This is really good! I finally have that explanation of background that I've been pining for for the last few chapters. :twisted: Well this is great, the whole day with ...

This is really nice, Ayra! Even though (as others have already said) the whole thing with the mother leaving is a bit vague, the story on the whole is really ...

Gosh, I'm really behind on this. I've been really busy the last few weeks. I don't have much to say (except the usual: WE NEED MORE OF CODEN'S BACKGROUND!!). This ...

As has already been said, this is really too short to critique. I know you don't want to post something TOOO long because people might get bored reading it, but ...

This is really good! I love the glimpse we got into this strange world. I am assuming, of course, that this is just a first chapter? There are a few ...

Darn you, Ayra! You caught all the good ones. :( BUT! I found a few nit-picks that escaped Ayra's combing: I was just thinking, Godzilla?! What the...?, when I caught ...

This is really good! I can see why you won, with a piece like this. :roll: I don't have anything constructive to say, so I feel bad... but good job! ...

These are very good, my dear! The imagery is beautiful... if a tad purple--but I'd be being hypocritical if I called your work purple prose. :D You include all four ...

This is pretty good! It's kind of a fable or folk-story kind of thing which makes me think that it would be happier in Other Fiction than Fantasy Fiction, but ...

Well, this is pretty good. I understand that it's just an exorcise for descriptions, so I won't hassle you about the fact that it's just description and nothing else. The ...

Whoa! Melikey! I love the personality of that strange woman in the end. At first, I really liked it (love the first paragraph, my dear!) then after a few paragraphs, ...

This was pretty good. I think it would be cooler if you had a reoccurring theme (like she says something almost the same as she does). The rhyming was pretty ...

Wow wow wow wow wow wow WOW!! This is by FAR my favoritist thing you've ever written in the whole history of foreverness! My my my. This is amazing my ...