AliceFairfield

There is palpable suspense in this chapter. I liked how the new character Callan is introduced. His actions make it clear he's not a bad person. The only main suggestion ...

Is your style based on the light novel genre? The narrative gives off similar vibes to LN's I've read in the past. Charlotte's reaction to entering an alternate universe was ...

This was a great story! I would love to read another told from the boy's point of view. That would clear up a lot of the mystery going on here. ...

Eww...I hate slushy snow too. It's just gross, no other way to describe it. This poem is really short, so there's nothing much to edit. I'd suggest capitalizing the beginnings ...

So Duncan and Julia married after all! (A slight typo near the beginning: "bed" became "bead.") Callie and Evan seem like sweet kids. ^^ This chapter itself has no huge ...

Is the passage starting with "I hope my fellow followers" meant to be italicized? Other than that, I found no major problems with this chapter. I really felt bad for ...

This was funny. I laughed a lot while reading this~ I'm fond of Mark Twain's works (satire king), but even I have to admit, sometimes it feels like writers use ...

I love Disney's fairies, so this caught my eye. The whole story was simply adorable. Preparing for someone's wedding, let alone a "royal wedding" is crazy...(personal experience helping out with ...

I could really feel Julia's excitement in this chapter. It'd be great if she passed the science test. From what I can tell so far, Julia seems to be an ...

I had fun reading this! And I'm picky about what I read for entertainment, so if I say a story's fun and interesting, it usually is. The only mistakes I ...

I'm interested in Eastern European topics, so this essay caught my eye. Your writing is very easy to understand, which is rare for technical works. I usually hate reading essays, ...

All of your characters sound great, if you ask me. The physical descriptions you put in really helped me visualize them in my head. I'm not good at making characters ...

I've already said this for the first chapter, and I thought the same about the second chapter, but your writing is good. Really good. I rarely see this kind of ...

This was great. I mean it. In fact, this feels like something that might appear in a textbook, if it were a bit longer (school stuff is always long...). The ...

Fantasy castles...Real castles...Not the same thing. This essay was actually easy to read, which is amazing. I hate reading essays normally, because I can't understand a single thing. But your ...