This chapter (and possibly the next two) are more character/background focused than world-building. But it wouldn't be fair for me to ask you to review later parts of the story without any context. I'm still looking for help with world building if you would be so kind, but it's not really the focus of the chapter. Any help is greatly appreciated though.
Take how ever long you nee. I'll be patient and wait until you've finished those ahead of me. Thanks in advance!
When I was young I used to have problems finishing my sentences, but now I
Hi! I need a review for my fantasy short story. I'm submitting it for a contest at the end of the month and I need constructive feedback. It's in three parts, because I think its hard to read a lot of text online at one time, but altogether its only around 3,500 words. I would really appreciate it if you could read all three parts. The first one is here: work.php?id=96979 (for some reason this refuses to be an actual link. Sorry!) and there are links to the others at the beginning.
If you have time, could you please review: work.php?id=97076 Thanks!!!!!!!!!
“Fang: 'Man, You weigh a freaking ton! What have you been eating, rocks?' Max: 'Why, is your head missing some?” ― James Patterson, The Angel Experiment
Still open for business. Feel free to take a look at my reviews in the links posted thus far. They tend to be pretty detailed and comprehensive. If that's what you're after, post below!
So you're going to kill a god. Sure. But what happens next?
