Hey Sally

This is so absolutely adorable! Also being a complete sap for romance I loved it. I wish so much that you get to see her again. It was also very well written they is only a couple minor things that I would change but obviously that is completely up to you. One is the second stanza, the second and fourth line doesn't flow as well as other stanzas'. Although I do understand it is really hard to come up with words that always work the way that you want them to. Second, I feel when you end a line in a poem that is the end of the thought like the first two lines in each stanza felt natural but when you got to the third line it felt a bit awkward because you weren't about to understand it with out the second line. But those are just my little pet peeves that I would fix but it is up to you the form it still really great. Over all I really like it.
Keep up the great writing!
-Roxie Rain

Heya! Team Aqua has come here for another review! Don't panic, just cooperate and everything will be fine.

First of all, I want to say that this reminds me so terribly much of Hey Jude by The Beatles. That is not a problem at all, I just wanted to put it out there.

This poem sounds to be like a love note, whether that's how you intended it to sound I have no idea, but it does. Maybe the person is trying to write a letter to this 'Sally' and the different parts of the poem are all his attempts at writing this letter. That's my interpretation.

Hey Sally, Dear Sally
Just once again I say
I knew you only once,
And thought of you today.

Hiya!

I think this poem has a really good writing poem and is well put together in its writing characteristics. It has a rhythm that's easy to follow and flows really well, but I didn't like how repetitive it was. I understood that this was ingenuitive and that it was signature part of the poem, but to me, it seemed like the repetition of that one line

"Hey Sally, Dear Sally"

took away from the piece. It seemed like the line was kind of a filler. I think that you have a good technique in writing poetry, but I'm not sure that there's a lot of depth in the expression of the subjects that you're writing about. This poem is supposed to be about lost love, good memories, and a tender fondness that will never be regained by an aching soul. Your portrayal of the girl and how you felt about her is just very short and feels rushed. Overall I think it has a lot of potential and that your writing is smooth and easy to read. I only wish that your stanzas had a bit more strength in their contents. Thank you for sharing this. Keep writing.

Hey!

My favorite line was the last two: "I knew you only once and thought of you today." I thought it was beautifully phrased, and elegant in the way of how realistic it seemed. You had a few errors, grammatically, the most obvious one being "but I had chose to leave."

The storyline itself was a little lacking: I would've liked to have more description. You contradicted yourself when you said "I barely knew your name," then went back and said "I learned more of you than just your name." So did the narrator really know Sally, or did they only just meet when she...died? Disappeared? We don't really find out what happened at all to the narrator and Sally.

Also one more MAJOR thing: you wrote your poem in ABCB format, and the first two stanzas don't even rhyme! (See: ^name^ and ^again^, then *green* and *me*.) When writing a poem in this format, you need to make sure that they are all in the same style, or else it distracts the reader from your story.

I'm sorry-I don't mean to be rude, I just would like to help you. I want you to keep writing! This was a good piece, and I hope that you can take the good from this review and keep building on it.

Nice work, though. Really! Keep writing,
Smanske15

I really like your rhyming pattern here. It fits the tone and makes the poem very catchy. One thing: I feel like you may have wanted to say "Jersey Shore" at some point, but said "Jersey's Shore." Or it may have been intentional. You're the writer, after all. Anyway, good job!