Published August 11, 2026
Sometimes I think the self of mine is an illusion. My thoughts don’t feel like me as I write them on a blank piece of paper. I read it again and again, and can’t help the urge to watch it burn.
I feel hatred towards the words I’ve written. And I realize that those thoughts which I’ve come to understand to be more written than thought, are not me. And that the version of myself that I find to be deep and meaningful, is not defined by the words of verbal thought, but by the feelings that pull on my gut and make me see colors.
That is the real me. The one I can’t help but fail to express.
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138,720 Literary Works • 672,258 Reviews
Hi Swazi! Welcome to yws and congratulations on sharing your first piece of writing!
This is a really sad piece, but one I am sure many can relate too, including me.
This part is very deep and intimate, and it is the most striking piece of imagery in the whole piece. The idea that you feel defined not by words you have thought about in order to write, but by the natural feelings you feel in your body is a brilliant way to describe something I have not found words to express before.
I wonder if you could try and arrange some of these more abstract thoughts into a structured poem, or even a longer piece? I think they would work well as a poem with stanzas. Some more abstract descriptions rather than straight up telling us the feelings would make it even more poignant than it already is!
Keep writing <3
Thank you for your review! I’ll definitely try some time in the future to write in different styles of poetry, but for now I find I can attach words to my ideas most effectively without thinking or structuring anything at all. Though sometimes the structure forms itself, and maybe someday (if I keep developing my writing skills) I’ll be able to write with the rhyme and structure of a classic poem with the same intuitive style I write with now. Anyway thanks for your review.
This is so insanely relatable. Sometimes our thoughts and feelings can feel manufactured and like they have been placed there by someone else. In my opinion the best feelings are the ones you can't describe at all.
Hey swazi! I see you're in the green room and wanted to review your work!
I am reminded of Lydia from Beetlejuice with this line when she says, "I myself am, strange and unusual." Not sure why that line came to my mind, but it did.
I do think depersonalization is prevalent among many but also feel your last line encapsulates your true meaning in the poem perfectly. It's not that the writer is dealing with depersonalization, it's that they feel their ability to express their truest self is not what they'd like it to be. Many can relate to that too! I feel that way more when I speak than when I write but it can be difficult with both mediums.
I enjoyed reading and thank you for sharing!
Thanks for your review
It means a lot to have someone actually read something I’ve written (I don’t often share) so thanks.