I used to find some comfort,
I used to find you cared.
But nothing hurts worse,
and nothing will compare.
You put your hand in mine,
and I'm slowly pulling away.
But something won't let go,
and it’s probably me.
Learning to let go,
I've found is far too hard.
But staying with you,
will push me way too far.
So I'll continue to learn,
and I hope you will understand.
I'm learning to let go,
to let go of your hand.
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125,011 Literary Works • 672,841 Reviews
Hey I'm Caitie.
I wanted to say that this was indeed a very sad but romantic poem. I love how in a shortish poem there is a big story. We all need to learn how to let go. In this case it was to let go of a person, but in many other cases we have to let go of other things(like objects or relationships.) This poem flowed beautifully together and I love it so very much. All and all the grammar and punctuation used was very well. I look forward to reading more of your works.
Thank you so much!
Hey I'm Caitie.
I wanted to say that this was indeed a very sad but romantic poem. I love how in a shortish poem there is a big story. We all need to learn how to let go. In this case it was to let go of a person, but in many other cases we have to let go of other things(like objects or relationships.) This poem flowed beautifully together and I love it so very much. All and all the grammar and punctuation used was very well. I look forward to reading more of your works.
Hey! I'm here for a quick review!
First of all, I just want to say I like the rhythm of this poem. It's consistent, and the beat is close the one you have in rhyming poem. It makes for a smooth, enjoyable reading. That being said, I think this poem has potential in it, and it's just a matter of addressing basic stuffs and learning to enhance your message.
I disagree with the reviewer below about needing to capitalize the first letter of the first word in each line. I think this poem falls under the Capitalizing Sentences as opposed to Capitalizing Lines category. Therefore, you only need to capitalize the first letter of the first word in each sentence. The sentence is broken into lines.
That settled, I think the second line can be improved. As it is, the addition of 'that' breaks the flow of your poem. I suggest to take it out, as 'that' often can be removed while maintaining the meaning of the poem. 'I used to find you cared' makes sense. It makes the line tighter, and the message is delivered more piercingly.
These lines are incomplete. Worse than what? The letting go of his hand part? I understand if you want to keep the letting go part at the end, but looking at these lines, they aren't making much sense. Perhaps foreshadowing of what's coming can clear some confusion of your readers. 'But nothing hurts worse / than what is to come' makes the 'worse' part more sensible, as it compares to something else.
I hope there'd be more imageries in here. The putting hand, letting hand go part is a simple imagery that convey the message directly, but it's actually overused or cliche, so blending it with other imageries can not only making the intended message more powerful or poignant, but also divides readers' attentions equally to each imagery and avoid them to think the hand part as cliche.
That is all! Keep up the good job!
Wow I really like this. All I have to say is you forgot to capitalize the A in line 8. Other than that, this is fantastic. We all go through relationships that don't work. I like the rhyme scheme that is in this poem. It makes it flow. You have great talent so keep up the great work.
Thank you.
I really like how smooth this flows. nothing i could pick out wrong. good job. keep this up!
Thank you!