This was an actual short conversation I had with my sister about her watching movies on a plane she will leave on on Monday. It's cheesy, but it was funny when it happened, and we ended up repeating it -___- My speech is in italics and my sister's speech is in normal font.
I hope they have "How to Train Your Dragon 2".
Don't spoil it for me if they do!
Of course I wouldn't do that to you.
Hey, that rhymed all the way through!
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Canary word: Present
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125,006 Literary Works • 672,813 Reviews
This poem is really short and rather cute!
I just love it when stuff like this happens in real life, don't you?
Anyways, as I said earlier, this is pretty cute. I'm glad you included the not a the beginning, it helped me understand it.
I really can't nitpick this, because you can't change history, so.........
Thank you for a neat, small poem.
Royal Highness has arrived to review!
Well, this was a fun read! Funny, this happened to me and my brother just yesterday except we were intentionally trying to rhyme off each other and we ended up going on for ten or fifteen minutes without a mistake!
Just two little nitpicks!
That period on the end needs to be inside the quotations, and you need a comma after the word "have." I think. I might be wrong on that. But I'm pretty sure.
This is just a suggestion but it would make me breathe easier if you put a comma after, "Of course."
Other than that, you're golden. Keep being adorable with your sister!
Hello, love! Aurora here with a quick review for you.
I must say, this was quite funny to read. I mean, I've had the happen to me before, but never with the perfect amount of syllables (nearly) in each line, as you seem to have here.
Of course I wouldn't do that to you.
I realize that this is an actual conversation, but I think, frankly, that the poem would read and sound better overall without the 'of course' that you have at the beginning of this line.
I'd consider making this longer (because that would just make it THAT much finnier, you know), and maybe adding an opening and closing couplet of rhyming narration.
Keep writing, love.
This was a nice read.
Aurora