dissimulation

Your poem hit me like a tidal wave. It hit me out of the blue and I liked the delivery of it. I didn't even know that word existed until you first mentioned it.

I wrote a similar poem, but it was kind of different from yours. It talks about sexual assault as well, but I think it was a softer town to it, but instead yours was like, OUT THERE! I like when writers such as yourself do that because it really brings into focus topics around the world that people don't discuss.

The second lines especially the ones about the sisters being looked at upon men with demon eyes and fangs really captivates what really happens during those dire moments of the assault. We might not have been there to see what happened, and we may not have personally felt it, but it is sickening. Just downright disturbing. To capture how those men really feel, the next line after says, ''men ask my brothers why we sacrificed our wet pleasures.''

People will always say it's the girl's fault, or that boys will be boys. That such reasoning is faulty and the very ones who believe it ought to be ashamed of their selves. Men will even blame the women themselves saying that ''she was asking for it.'' The way our society and morals have changed in this world is just terrible.

Now the last part of your poem I really didn't get as much, so if you could please and thank you elaborate on that part, I would really appreciate it.

Thank you for writing a poem today friend! I hope you have a good day/night wherever you may be, and just know, you are worth more than your body.

Dannnnggg this one hits hard. It's incredible how you brought such strong emotions to life so vividly in such a short piece. "Pacing like a caged animal around and around this ** body" really hits home. But also: "you turned my body into a heaving hell." And the end feels like sickening victory. When the victim declares with absolute certainty that he/she was wronged and the abuser will face exactly the retribution he/she was using as a threat. Incredible, I wouldn't change a word of it. I just hope there isn't a personal reason you seem to understand this so well ❤️‍🩹

hello,

i would just like to preface that i haven’t done a review in a hot minute, so i apologize if i’m a little rusty.

this is very powerful and i applaud you for being able to depict something very dark and really dig deep to tell this awfully truthful reality that so many individuals have experienced. the language used in this is very well done and i absolutely admire the formatting. it is extremely intentional.

i think that the opening statement/definition regarding the subject matter of the poem does a great job at creating a juxtaposition against the piece, as the formatting itself is extremely interesting and purposeful. it almost reads to me as a third party speaking the statement, rather than the narrator. even though it adds to the level of effectiveness, i wonder if this can be altered and stitched into the poem itself. it would add a level of fluidity and establish the subject matter of the poem as the reader continues to read the piece. it may take away the level of intentionality you are achieving, but i think that it is something you could play around with in future poems. besides this, i have no other critiques.

once again, i appreciate the time and effort you put into crafting this piece. have an amazing day.

-rainforest