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Most human

by mongoose


Most human.docx 

Most Human




You were a stranger,

 	A hostile outcast,

Hidden away from the world.




Torn between two

places, searching,

yearning.




For something,

someone.

Someone to guide you.




In that moment,

I knew nothing,

In that moment,

I was blind.

In that moment,

	I spoke out.




I reached where

none had before,

into your heart.

The place most sacred,

	Most secret,

The place,

	Most Human.




You were no longer

a stranger,

no longer,

an outcast.




You were,

	glorious.

	Amazing.

You were complicated, yes.

No one could deny that.




Yet, you were not inhuman.




Statistically, analytically, you were.

Your mind
befuddled,

you believed,

that you were
hated.

You were not.

You was loved,

dearly.




Ashayam,

My love of you.

was indescribable.

Beyond the galaxy it stretched,

out among the stars.

Past the fires,

Through the turmoil.




Rising above your logic,

To me,

You were beautiful.

To me,

you were my panou.




You were,

Human.


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193 Reviews

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Reviews: 193

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Sun Oct 27, 2013 9:58 pm
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Niraco wrote a review...



This poem I found was very unique and unlike anything I had seen before. I must ask. What did you make a fan-fiction on? I couldn't tell.

If I knew what this was regarding perhaps I would have related more to it but it still didn't hinder my enjoyment of this poem.

My favourite lines would have to be:

My love of you.
was indescribable.
Beyond the galaxy it stretched,


These lines were so beautifully romantic and even made me go "aww" like a little girl.

I could feel such beautiful emotion was put into this poem which made me love it even more.

All in all I loved this poem an awful lot and my only complaint was that it could have done with a little more imagery just to make it that more amazing. Other than that it was very well done. Great job!




mongoose says...


Thankyou, and it was based on star teek between spock and uhura, thus is uhura expresing herself to spock, in a way she thinks that he will understand, thanks again for reviewing:)



Niraco says...


Oh, I understand a lot more.



mongoose says...


Yeah so its like uhura tapping into spocks enotional side ok n a sense, where inhuman was spick showing uhura that he does have emotions and that he just struggle to show them, so thus is uhura understanding.



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170 Reviews

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Sun Oct 27, 2013 9:49 pm
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yubbies21 wrote a review...



Hello there!

It's very unique this poem, you say it's fan-fiction? From what? I am interested...

The way you arranged it is creative. It doesn't seem to provide a purpose other than emphasis on certain lines and to look different. I like it!

I didn't understand the references to the Fan-fiction, but I liked the poem!

Happy Review Day!

yubbies21




mongoose says...


Thanks for reviewing and the fanfiction us star trek spock and uhura, i have a story on there called 'the complications of ashaya heh ozhika' thats almost finished. Thanks again. :)



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43 Reviews

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Sun Oct 27, 2013 9:34 am
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paula08 wrote a review...



This is an unusual and very creative poem. I really loved it since it is unique and gets the reader into thinking about it. It is deep in a certain way and hooking. If I were you though I would arrange the excess punctuations. Apart from that it was fabulous....keep on writing!!!

-from me




mongoose says...


Thankyou and puncutation is my weakest point ;p



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30 Reviews

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Tue Oct 15, 2013 2:45 am
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Sleeplessend wrote a review...



This is honestly what i feel an insane persons sanity would say to them. That maybe if an insane persons sanity didnt feel the need to hide that some people could be saved may it be that they were victims or the person themself. I really enjoyed reading this and wished it was longer. Perhaps next time you could delve more into the emotions and possible outcomes of the emotions may it be lightful or dark... Nonetheless it was an awesome read and would like to see more of your work. :)




mongoose says...


Thankyou, sorry for the formattung. And its based in a fanfiction im writing so uts in a way a summary of the emotions in the book, glad you liked ut thankyou for the review!:)



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18 Reviews

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Mon Oct 14, 2013 7:59 pm
mongoose says...



I apologise for the formatting the computer had some sort of melt down on me!
Ashayam= beloved
Panou=world

they are vulcan words from selek starbase10 vld website, which I am so glad he created!:P




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95 Reviews

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Mon Oct 14, 2013 7:59 pm
Clarity wrote a review...



Brolington... apart from the formatting, this was fabulous. But, YWS does have it's formatting issues. XD

The only thing I saw that could have been changed was taking away the odd comma that wasn't needed. But in this piece, you did really good with everything!

I loved it! Brilliant ending to the book, especially it Inhuman is your prologue.

Awesome! :D

Happy Writing, Pageletelli.




mongoose says...


Thankyou brolington, theres a little paragraph that im going to stick with it as well, jst for finesse aha:P,
coma's coma's coma's evrywhere.



Clarity says...


Hahaha, cool cool. :p




Stupidity's the deliberate cultivation of ignorance.
— William Gaddis