Read before continuing: On October 12, 2023, I published a piece about the unexpected nature of emotions. It's presently July 17th, 2024. I wrote the essay while I was a freshman in high school, battling with a variety of symptoms. But now, as a junior, I'm starting high school with new meds and a new mentality of striving harder as life becomes more tough. This is an updated essay about "New Beginnings." This is for you, young people. It demonstrates that middle and high school will soon end, and things will get more difficult, but assistance is unexpectedly useful.
Every day is a fresh beginning, as is every birth and death. Every orbit around the sun may take 365 days, but it always finishes with the start of the new year. Beginnings are similar to roots; they take time to grow but eventually blossom into something lovely. Sometimes it requires help to get their first steps. Talking is my sun; it is warm, but it may also burn us. Medication is like water to me; I can manage how much I drink, how much I control my emotional tyrant, and how my fire spreads. Junior year is a new beginning, but hearing everyone say it's the hardest year is unsettling. Everyone goes through it once before attempting again in senior year.
I don't want to sound furious in my writing anymore, yet the words that come out of my lips seem more like hate speech than the truth. However, everything I say is true and never a lie. It's alarming when your emotions become dictatorial in your daily existence. When every fingertip tracing your keyboards results in words of mountains of hatred for oneself, and others are unaware of it. To fight to breathe while experiencing the overpowering sense of beginning over and over. New meds, new pals, it's petrifying, scary, and any synonym for horrifying.
"Highschool isn't forever," they say, but the memories one makes there are. to recall how alone they were in their room, and how they felt about controlling each other. It's scary to be in my thoughts, and finding anything that truly works is even worse. Knowing that one easy tablet is all that is required to be fine is alarming, Even if you utter something unexpected, you anticipate a reaction, yet surprisingly, most people share your sentiment. At first, it's an unusual sensation, but your mind adapts to it. It adjusts to the idea that you don't have to conceal your true self behind this author persona to be considered normal, to feel comfortable expressing emotions through words. Even if words alone could never fully convey one's feelings.
As I pen these thoughts and emotions, I find myself unable to care if anyone comprehends the depth of my words. Because, at my core, I am the author of these thoughts, and I understand that not everyone will resonate with them. The very words that have often led to mistakes are also the ones that are evolving and expanding with fresh perspectives. I am eager to continue growing on this platform, sharing short stories of both horror and love. The fear of being crushed under the weight of "Will people like this?" is a burden I no longer bear, for it is only when I am truly passionate about what I write that it truly matters...
(Jk, we all know I'll still cry if it's not perfect. tricked you.)
Years of fearing criticism have haunted you. Thoughts like, "I've messed up so badly, I'll never write again," have crossed my mind. Witnessing people's faces adopt this strange expression that's etched in your memory is difficult; it brings a sense of defeat. However, I've learned to face it and cope with it. This update essay, unlike the dreamy grandeur of my freshman year, doesn't seem as angry or sad. At least, I'm not crying while writing it. It feels authentic, reflecting my hopefulness and the new growth I believe I'm experiencing. Even though I'm still in my early teens, I have the capacity to mature when the time is right. For now, I'll learn to slowly accept criticism and continue to enjoy writing.
It's challenging at first, especially if you're in middle school and reading this, or even in your freshman year of high school, you might feel the urge to use a shotgun approach in the first few months, or perhaps throughout your entire school experience. At least, remember that you have the potential to grow, and that memories are forever. It's okay to not want to do anything as long as you're happy.
Regarding the update, I'm currently working on writing a book. While it may be unoriginal and plain, that's okay with me. I understand that many people might not enjoy it or find it boring. I'm okay with that because at least I'll have an excuse to say I was just a teenager. (jk) Initially, I might feel angry, but I'll learn to accept that not everyone will appreciate my work.
(Sneaking an opinion in here, please buy books you know you'll like. :,).
Enjoy everything.
Love, the new and improved not hiding behind a persona anymore.
-P
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125,020 Literary Works • 672,738 Reviews
Hello! Ley here to review this amazing work for you. Today, I will be using my 'Summer Themed Review Template'! I will start with opening statements, highlight and summarize my favorite parts, note areas that could be improved, and then give you my closing statement! I hope you find this review helpful, and I hope you're having a wonderful Summer, if that's the season wherever you are in the world! Let's get into it!
A Warm Welcome
Thank you for publishing this narrative! I know this may be extra personal to you, so I really applaud you for being vulnerable and sharing this with us. A lot of these feelings I related to, being as I had similar thoughts I've had. You also had some great points that I'd love to touch on.
Sunny Moments
I can so relate to this, and I'm sure others can too. I've noticed it's totally okay to have anxiety about introspection, and confronting your own thoughts can be tiring and inducing. I feel like this is the case with most Highschoolers, even if they don't speak it. Thank you for mentioning this, that highschool can resonate with a person forever.
The detachment from caring how your words are seen regarding others is such a real struggle as an author. But, that's the beauty of it. We, as writers, are about to jot down whatever we feel is important to us, not to others. And that's the beauty of it all. It can be a struggle to find those who relate, but it's still so powerful. I've felt like this plenty of other times too, and it was a very overwhelming feeling. I do love how you mentioned the bright side of this, that your words will always evolve-- even if they don't sit well with others. I absolutely loved this point, and I think more people should feel the same way.
And of course, the last sentence. It portrays themes of resilience, triumph, and bravery. It was truly beautiful.
Heat and Haze
I honestly do not have any suggestions to this piece and I can definitely tell your a seasoned and talented writer. Great job!
Overall Vibes
Overall, this was an awesome realistic narrative you have here. I hope to read more of your work in the future, and keep being amazing! Have a lovely day <3
Hello! Let's get into my feedback.
Anyway, thanks for sharing, and keep up the good work!
This feels almost like a journal entry in nature, which gives a sense of transparency and authenticity. I appreciate the self-awareness that shows in the way you reflect on your own thoughts and feelings, as well as just your experiences. Also, I get a sense of impermanence in what you've written here - meaning that you really seem to be aware that you're in a very transitory stage of life that will pass just like all your experiences before now, and that new experiences will again come to take the place of present ones.
I like your reflections on new beginnings. Your use of comparison and imagery paint a mental picture and provide for greater relatability. I really liked your descriptive examples that employ images of sun and water and liken them to specific things in your life. This is a unique perspective, and while it's personal in nature, in that it's what you personally experience, I don't think it alienates the reader from what you're trying to get across.
Throughout this piece, I can pick up on a mood of someone who's mellowing out while simultaneously not losing their fire. Again, I appreciate the self-awareness that comes through in your recognition that things that happen to us are temporary but also lasting. It seems you are sensitive to finer breakdowns of multiple perspectives on a concept. You're learning to live with the fact that two seemingly opposite things can be true about an experience at the same time. You can look back and see where you've come from, and yet you can have hope for what's ahead. You've learned that it is possible to get through the rough times.
I mentioned hope already, and I will go further on that thought by noting that what you've written also conveys a sense of hope for the future. Your eyes are open to the reality of the fact that the whole road will not be easy, but still you want to keep going. An overall refining of character and perspective is evident here. Also, your transparency with your feelings and how you've faced discouragement and temptations to quit are relatable. Yet your determination to continue what you're passionate about comes out on top.
You touched on some important concepts in sharing the journey of learning not to become too burdened down by what other people think or whether they will like what you write. But your humanity comes through in your confession that you still do care about whether your projects are received favorably, and that side of things is important, too.
I think you could work a bit on keeping consistent with the theme of each paragraph and making sure everything pieces together in an organized, thematic way. For example, in your 2nd paragraph, you start talking about new beginnings, but then you start into specifics of how getting outside help benefits you. While these things do fit thematically with your imagery of new beginnings being like roots, it almost seemed to me like you were trying to discuss two things in one paragraph while they possibly would do better having their own separate paragraphs. Maybe you could do a specific other paragraph on ways getting outside help can be beneficial. That's just my take, though.
Like I said before, this whole piece has the feel of a journal entry, and those are allowed to be chaotic and disorganized. However, to polish this up for general reading, you may consider making sure each paragraph stays on theme, as I noticed several instances where it just felt a little off and I wasn't sure which direction we were going. Again, that's not to say it's bad, just that it could improve with some organization. Make sure each paragraph also flows well into the following one in a way that builds your theme rather than having bits and pieces all over the place.
This was quite nice to read. You take time with your words and convey a sensitivity of mind and nature that value the impact and beauty of the written word in a special way. In other words, you like to stop and smell the roses, but with words.
Thank you for taking the time to write this review. I truly appreciate your efforts to delve into the content. I may write chaotically, but I welcome criticism; whether I choose to apply that constructive criticism is up to me, and I should take it into consideration. I love when people read my work and interpret it in their own way. Sometimes, I don't even know what I'm saying until someone breaks it down for me. I enjoy that my work can be open to different interpretations. Once again, I enjoyed your review. Writing about something personal to another person is also very personal in its own way. In my opinion, to write a review, you have to understand or at least experience something similar to the person who wrote it, or have experienced an idea of the level of understanding. Thank you, and I look forward to posting again soon and taking your criticism into account to be more mindful of my themes in paragraphs!