The Life of a Drug Addict: One.

I wasn’t always like this. I used to be beautiful with a full set of pearly whites in my mouth and clean, untainted lungs. Now, my blood swims with the various diseases I’ve contracted through the years.

As a child, I watched as my mother flowed with a never-ending succession of men, flaunting each with a show of flying clothes and wandering hands. Each new male companion eyed my sister and me, either with contempt or hungry appreciation. There was never a decent, in-between guy. Mother sure had a way of picking them. I kept my younger sister, Riki Lee, away from them the best I could.

There was never a quiet day in my house. Usually loud yells, fighting and/or moaning filled the air, piercing the air with the vulgarity of it. Our neighbors heard, but either chose to ignore it or threw nasty garbage at the side of our dingy, stained exterior. I, as the oldest, was delegated to cleanup duty; basically, I had to clean the raunchy waste off and clear it away before Mother floated out of her delirious state, falling flat on her face in it.

School was my escape. I could lose myself in the droning of the teachers as they lectured; anything was better than going home. Sometimes, I thought about getting afterschool detention so I could prolong my departure into hell.

Mom had just introduced Kevin to us in a hurried rush to her room. We barely caught a glimpse of him before he was dragged into her room, the creaky wooden door slamming behind them. Riki Lee looked at me as the sound of the headboard hitting the wall filled the air. I offered to take her for ice cream and she quickly accepted. I was grateful that she was young enough to be distracted by such things, or maybe she had me fooled. Maybe she was wiser than I, knowing full well what was occurring behind the splintering door. Either way, I snagged some change out of my hidden piggy bank and secretly slid it back into place into my pillowcase. I didn’t bother leaving Mother a note; she wouldn’t be out for the rest of the night.

The only good thing I really remember about that night is wiping smeared chocolate syrup off of Riki Lee’s small mouth.

When we returned to the house, surprisingly Mother was in the living room. Unusually alert, she darted to the door as we entered.

“Where the hell have you been?” She demanded, her voice hoarse and words flying out, twisting together in a massive heap. I stared into her eyes. They were glassy and her pupils were massively dilated, flickering wildly over everything in the room. Her arms had small, reddish holes in scattered in a few places. She started to scratch them, mumbling something about fleas infesting the carpet. The man, Kevin, stumbled out of her bedroom, leaning awkwardly against the door frame. Mother turned to him and grinned mischievously, her eyes glazed over. From the looks of them both, they’re blazed out of their minds. Kevin strutted towards her, wrapping his large, scarred arms around my mother’s waist. She nuzzled into him, biting his neck. I bit my lip to keep from gagging and ushered little Riki out of the room. I made sure she locked the door from the inside, telling her to answer only to the secret knock.

We established this knock so that she’d never be forced to accept any unwanted visitors. For a seven year old she is the smartest individual I know.

After instructing her, I reentered the living room and stood rooted to the floor. Mother was staring blankly at me, drool dribbling from her lips. Kevin slowly sauntered towards me. He smiled, a filthy show of stained, chipped canines.

“You’re the spitting image of her,” He whispered roughly. I took a step back, but he followed step for step.

“Maybe you’ll be able to satisfy me,” Kevin rubbed his stomach, his crusty hands unzipping his stiff jeans. “No,” I responded; a scary awareness passed over me. My eyes fluttered around the room, looking for an escape. His large body eclipsed mine. I couldn’t stop him when he pushed me to the ground and climbed on top of me. Mother stared at me as I screamed for her. She stood and foolishly, I thought she was going to help me, but she ran in circles around the room, tripping over the coffee table and face-planting.

~~~~~~

After he finished, my clothes hung in tatters against my body. I laid there numbly, blood seeping through the crotch of my pants. Standing, Kevin stared down at me.

“You work for me now, bitch!” He shouted, lighting a cigarette. He puffed on it for a second before looking at the glowing, red tip. Bending back down, he stroked my face before sticking the match into the sensitive skin of my armpit. I screamed, but no noise escaped due to my earlier, helpless pleas. I watched as Kevin walked over to Riki Lee’s door. Oh no!

He banged on it and shouted for her to come out. I held my breath, stiffening my body. No sound emanated. Kevin kicked the door in vain and strolled out. Pride swelled in my chest. Riki Lee was safe; she was going to make it. Mother still hadn’t moved as I dragged myself into a sitting position. I tore my clothes off angrily and cried into the remains of my shirt. Laying beside me is a piece of paper with an address. Unknowing to me, Kevin has given the first key to my demise.