The song of the elements

Ok, I like this. Very smooth and relaxing. But this is a review. First thing, you're missing a LOT of periods. You're starting new sentences without finishing the previous, Ex. "The water rushes The leaves rustle (you misspelled this word as well)" Even in a poem you have to end a sentence with a period. I would make "... water and it is not earth." the end of a sentence. Then make "My favorite element is always there." its own sentence. All in all its very good. I hope you don't take this too harshly, you got talent that's for sure.

Well, this is good, but,as you know, you aren't always the best with spelling, and you made a few mistakes here. I love this piece, but it needs capitalization and some of these lines should be shorter.You show your feelings to the elements, and tell the world what you have repeatedly told me:
That Air is you favorite element. So yeah. But this is great. Cassidy, you should post more of your poems.

Good morning/evening/afternoon/night!
First off l would like to point out what I think to be a minor spelling error. You put "endin" when you meant "ending". Remember to re-read several times, also if it is on purpose add an apostrophe. *
I particularly like the structure you have, the change in rhyme and rhythm in the second verse, .
Considering your lack of punctuation this has good rhythm, written so the natural breaks match the ends of the lines.
Well done,
Take That You Fiend!


*By the way you can edit your work by using the button on the right.

This is nice, and it would be cute if you didn't have some of those spelling and gramarical mistakes in there. I especially love the flow and rhyming of the poem: it really encourages you to use mental imagery.

Some Nitpicks:
1. Spelling mistakes:
- crakle (stanza 1, line 2) should be crackle
- recives (stanza 1, line 3) should be receive
- disire (stanza 1, line 4) should be desire
- russtle (stanza 1, line 6) should be rustle
- muscules (stanza 1, line should be muscles
- endin (stanza 2, line 2) should be ending
2. The capatilization and punctuation in this poem is inconstant. The only puncuation you have in the entire poem is at the end, which, even if it was intentional, seems a little clumsy to the reader.

That being said, despite its grammatical and spelling mistakes this poem's content is very well written. Just clean it up a bit (which you can do by pressing the edit button next to the work) and this will be very beautiful. I would award this six of ten stars.

~Keep Writing!

Welcome to YWS! I'm happy to be your first reviewer, and let us begin ^^

For a first poem, this is pretty good. You definitely capture some whimsy in this piece with the description, and are able to display your feelings towards the elements.

Though, there are a few things that you can do to improve this piece.
-Using more advance vocabulary can definitely elevate your poem.
-How you space stanzas can also effect your work, for example, I think you should separate "its only sole desire" and "The water rushes" to make another, so that it's more balanced.
-Capitalize the beginning word of each line, that is a big thing in poetry. Even if it's in the middle of a sentence, capitalize it
-Is "endin" supposed to be "ending"? Just curious
-Decide whether you want to the poem to be rhyming, free-style, or combination. For the most part, this poem is rhyming, but there are some random lines that don't. Not that it's bad per say, but to some it may distracting if they're going with this rhyming flow, and suddenly it's cut off. It can pull a reader out of the environment you're setting up.

Most importantly, you must give some type of emotional meaning to this. Poetry is famous for its emotional appeal, and if you're not able to grasp that, then your poems could potentially fall flat. You're starting off really well, and I can't wait to see more ^^
Good luck
~Maddie

the g in ending didn't type