I see her, everyday.

by krizshelbenalycabral

Published October 12, 2013

In Poem

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This is just a poem i came up with while having deep thoughts. I'm not really a poem writer but I hope I can share my thoughts in this way. Thanks for reading, in advance :)


I see her everyday;

The way she moves,

Her endless glow,

Her majestic beauty does not fail to show.

As I lay my eyes on her,

Each moment seems like paradise.

As the wind blows rushes against her,

She moves along in perfect rhyme.

Her enchanting garments

Fits her perfectly;

There's nothing else I would rather see,

Than the way she gleams on her own.

Her brightening face and appearance

Brings joy and peace to most of us.

I always thought her splendor would never fade,

As I gaze at her with wondering.

But with a mist of darkness

Her once ever charming smile,

Suddenly seemed to disappear

With gloom, sadness, and fear.

Loud rumbling and eerie noises

Wrap around to suffocate her

Some evil cut her down

Piece by piece they take her life

I see her everyday;

Mother nature, I've always known her name.

But I wonder if tomorrow

All may lay eyes on her with grief and sorrow.

Wishing she'd always be there,

Her majestic beauty does not have to end,

With so much ignorance at man's hands.

Comments & reviews · 6

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Storygirl95
Review
Storygirl95 wrote a review Review · Oct 14, 2013

Hi krizshelbenalycabral!
This is a beautiful poem, and it makes me happy. I also find myself becoming sad when I read the second part, mostly because it's so true and you express it well. The only thing I would have to say is to be careful with some of your word endings. For example when you say"As the wind blows rushes against her" I wonder if you meant as the wind blows it rushes against her. "Her enchanting garments Fits her perfectly" should just be her enchanting garments fit her perfectly. And "As i gaze at her with wondering" should just be wonder. That's just my opinion, but if it wasn't what you wanted you should keep the poem how it is. It is a truly touching poem, one that brings forth the reality of what is happening today. Thank you so much for sharing this with us! Keep writing!
-Storygirl95

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SecretHaven
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SecretHaven commented Comment · Oct 13, 2013

I'd love to review this :3
This is a great poem, much better then what I can ever some up with. ^^' You're great at making poems, and it really kept me reading wondering what it would be about. Great job.

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N1K1 Comment
N1K1 commented Comment · Oct 12, 2013

I think this is a great topic to write about.
What I really like about this poem is that at the beginning the mood is positive and then it changes to negative feelings about what is happening.
What I did not like - the form of your poem seems to be a bit messy to me, I cannot really explain why...

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Vivian
Review
Vivian wrote a review Review · Oct 12, 2013

Hey, Viv here.

Wow! This is very good and very deep for someone who says they're NOT good at poetry. It's great, but I swore you were talking about a real girl. But still, I like your insight on how we treat our home and Mother. Yes we really will rue the day when we fully decide to accept what we're doing.

Well, keep writing! You're a good poet.

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GigiHarris
Review
GigiHarris wrote a review Review · Oct 12, 2013

This is quite a nice poem :)
This has a very deep meaning portrayed in simple yet fitting words.
The poem has a message which needs conveyed to everyone but sadly not much people are taking the necessary steps :(
Well, it is an amazing poem and keep writing! :)

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pseudonym123 Comment
pseudonym123 commented Comment · Oct 12, 2013

this is for mother earth,
and it's a good one
it's really deep;



Obsessing over what you regret won't get you anywhere.
— Steggy