Published April 6, 2012
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Canary word: Present
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I quite like this but I have an issue with the formatting. It came of as just lines, not stanzas or any sort of normal poetry structure. Structure and punctuation is very important as it can create flow, mood and what not.
Try something like
I thought of the time that was.
I think of the time that is.
What will be of the time next?
Who knows?
etc. When you put it like that it has a stunted stop start kind of feel as the lines i have put together are individual sentences .
Sorry about the bad review, I'm very rusty.
That is how I wrote it...something happened when i tried to cut and paste it here...I wasnt even aware it was posted. sigh.
work.php?id=94537 <-----------that is the actual poem, formatting and all. Thanks for actually reviewing it though. I feel bad for wasting your time.