Hey! Kazey here for a review.
So, this poem is pretty evident in the fact that your talking to yourself, right? I really like that. Even that simple touch adds an extra layer of depth to the poem.I also liked your choice of centring the text. It, to me, exemplified the way that our minds are both linear and diverse at the same time.
I feel you had some good imagery here, but it could be improved upon. Use a little more evocative vocabulary. If you need to, use a thesaurus, just make sure your wording isn't forced. Also, engage the senses of your reader. I find similes and metaphor is good for this, because it's both abstract and relatable at the same time, adding such depth to a piece like this.
I also think this poem missed a good opportunity for a refrain of the word courage. When you have it by itself in that one line, it feels to me that it would be a refrain throughout the poem and then... it's not. I think the refrain would've been a nice touch.
Anyway, thanks for sharing this, and please continue!
~Kazey
Points: 11
Reviews: 64
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