So to all of my friends who have survived this year
We are safe for now, or so I hear!
We’ve learnt so much we will never forget
And we’ve lived this year with no regret
Whether you’ve spent your time reading and writing
Hiding from the crowd and generally shying
Or you’ve been running wild and free
Laughing and screaming like a banshee
Whatever you’ve done be sure it was you
Or later on, you’ll be feeling blue
Because this year was special despite what you may think
It sped past, faster than a blink
When you’re older you’ll have time to reflect
And if you’re disappointed you’ll be wrecked
You’ll think of things you could have done better
Your past will write you a nice long letter
So whether or not you’ve enjoyed the time you’ve spent
Don’t dwell on it now live in the present
For it is the only way to make up for lost time
Soldier on and continue your climb
So while the eleventh hour is nigh
Merry Christmas to all, try not to die
Have a safe and happy holiday
My message to you; live life to the fullest every single day.
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125,009 Literary Works • 672,837 Reviews
Merry Christmas to all, try not to die
Have a safe and happy holiday
My message to you; live life to the fullest every single day.
I was about to say this has a very positive message. LOL
No, I think it does actually and you have made it in a very tongue in cheek way, which makes it all the more fun.
Well done.
Errr... you could have used some punctuation at the ends of the line to make the piece flow a little better when reading.
But aside from that, a fun little piece that I can't really fault.
Good job.
You should have seen my friends when I recited it for them. Their faces . . .
Hola, Strange here and I have a review for you!
I really liked this. It brought good intentions overall. You kept it light hearted so I really liked that. I just can't really say anything else but I liked it. This does poke at the people who make these end of the world theories somewhat. For some reason I just like it. I really have no words.
I have no cons.
Overall, hooray I survived 2013!
Strange gives you.
7.9/10
Good job
Keep writing
Stay groovy
P.S Sorry if this was useless. I'm not the worlds best reviewer. Have fun with life!
Thank you for the rating, stay cool you sassy unicorn and try to survive 2014
Hello there geekgirl!
I thought that you did really well writing this poem. I like the part at the end that says:
"Merry Christmas to all, try not to die"
I literally laughed out loud when I read that. I don't know why I find it so funny, but nonetheless I do. I like your story and the message that you are presenting to the reader who is well....reading it.
However, I hate being the bad guy, but there are some parts in this poem where the lines don't rhyme right/they almost seem as if they were forced into becoming rhymed. Like I'll show you one example:
"When you’re older you’ll have time to reflect
And if you’re disappointed you’ll be wrecked"
First off, this is altogether awkward. One, they don't even rhyme (and I'm not saying that you wanted it to rhyme) but it seems as if you were trying to go with the rhyming effect and it just didn't work out, if you get what I am saying to you.
Overall: I thought you did really good with the poem and provided a really good message for the reader. I just wish that you wouldn't have tried so hard to rhyme the words together.
-Emily
Thank you for pointing that out. I'm glad you enjoyed the poem and it really helps to get constructive criticism.
Hello there!
Rachel here to review.
This is a cute little poem you've made!
However, I think throughout the poem, it seems like you're trying too hard to make your poem rhyme.
Because of this, a couple of the lines don't really make sense, such as these:
This also caused others to just not flow very well at all, as they seem a little forced:
I like the idea of this! Its short and sweet. Those were just the couple things I noticed; great job on this!
Keep writing!
-Rae
Thank you for taking your time to tell me. I really appreciate it when I can improve my writing.
Hello there, here to review.
This was a nice poem, and you kept a rhythmicity throughout most of it, making it almost musical to read. However, there are a couple of things that you can do to improve it.
First of all:
I think that it is a poor way of starting your poem with "So". You could just start by saying "To all of my friends..." Also, you should probably put some kind of punctuation in the end, like "...who have survived this year:"
Then:
I find that this verse doesn't make much sense, and you should probably change it so that it's more understandable. This is one of the problems with rhymes; you try to change your sentences so they rhyme even though it doesn't necessarily always make sense.
This sentence is not wrong at all, but it does kind of break your flow.
Same with this:
It is very long compared to the other verses you have written and you could probably try dividing it into two verses.
I liked this verse, because it brought some comic relief to the poem and made it funnier.
I don't have much else to say, the rest of the poem is good. I hope this was helpful, happy review day and happy New Year. Keep writing,
-AlfonsoFernandez, proud member of the Commonwealth
Thank you, it was very helpful and I'm glad you liked it.
Timmyjake here to leave you a short review. I shouldn't be on YWS right now. *Looks each way* Coast clear. Here I go!
Onto your review!
You rhyme each one! I am so jealous! I can never rhyme like you do! In fact, I can't do poetry to save my life!
I'll just hit my little nitpicks here! There are only a few, so don't freak out. There isn't actually much to critique on this one.
The first thing I noticed was a lack of formatting. I am a sucker for formatting with poems. I love seeing it. I don't know, but it seems to make everything look so neat, having all of those stanzas. Poetry is really just how you want to do it, more freestyle than anything, so you don't have to listen to a word I say, but I think it would look better split up into stanzas.
We are safe for now, or so I hear!
I think it would flow better if you cut out the "now"
Laughing and screaming like a banshee
My favorite line in the whole poem. I want to scream like one, too!! But I am afraid I am the first type of person.
Don’t dwell on it now live in the present
I think that line should have a comma in the middle to separate the two different thoughts.
Merry Christmas to all, try not to die
I don't think that trying not to die has anything to do with Merry Christmas. I don't know what you could put in there instead, but I don't think it fits there.
I really enjoyed this! You have a knack for the rhyming poetry! I loved it!! Happy Writing!
~Timmyjake
I have no idea what happened to the formatting. Honestly I like the stanzas. I think the website glitched because I had four lines each stanza. Thank you for the review, it was much appreciated.
You're welcome!
Great poem really does sum up what the end of the year is to many people. I appreciate the positive theme telling people not to dwell on the past and if I'm not mistaken you crept in a small Doctor Who reference (goodbye Matt
) which I enjoyed. Not much to say really other than it's a well thought out poem non the least which is professionally set out. I hope to see more like this in the future from you for other events such as Easter maybe? Well done and keep up the good work. 
I actually don't watch Doctor Who sadly. My friends talk about it all the time and they're like why aren't you a Whovian (I think i spelled that right!?!?) I tell them that I have to watch it first. My best buddy is going to introduce it to me next year. So I won't stay in the dark too long. Anyway, thank you for the comment, it really means a lot. Merry Christmas -3 days.