z

Young Writers Society



The Art of Emotions

by fragile_heart(!)


Since it's NaPoWriMo, I thought I'd give it a shot! Better late than never :wink:

And just like that,
her face went from
a bright canvas
to blank white.

The brilliant colors
that filled her features
with such animation,
such vibrancy,
were swept away clean,
like taking turpentine to paint.

Her fiery red temper,
her jealous orange streak,
her sunny yellow smile,
her levelheaded greens
and gloomy storm cloud blues.

And all the colors in between
that she perfected
like the steady stroke
of a brush
were gone,
never to be seen
again.

The hand that was protecting the flame
glowing bright inside of her had
moved away, allowing harsh
winds to extinguish the
flames into flickering
embers that
were about
to turn to
ash.


Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.







Is this a review?


  

Comments



User avatar


Points: 890
Reviews: 2

Donate
Sun Apr 26, 2009 1:12 am



i really enjoyed reading it, the words were put together really well




User avatar
701 Reviews


Points: 10087
Reviews: 701

Donate
Wed Apr 22, 2009 8:35 am
bubblewrapped wrote a review...



What a lovely metaphor :) I really like the final stanza of this, and the idea of colours being wiped off someone's face like paint. That said, though, I think it started to get a little tired by the third stanza and was stretched out a little too much, so you might want to think about compressing some of the images together so that it doesn't feel so unweildy. ou also might want to watch the abundance of commas that seem to be congregating at the end of each line XD

Otherwise, an interesting piece. Kudos :)

Good luck with NaPoWriMo!

Cheers,
~bubbles





Man is by nature a political animal.
— Aristotle