Since it's NaPoWriMo, I thought I'd give it a shot! Better late than never 
And just like that,
her face went from
a bright canvas
to blank white.
The brilliant colors
that filled her features
with such animation,
such vibrancy,
were swept away clean,
like taking turpentine to paint.
Her fiery red temper,
her jealous orange streak,
her sunny yellow smile,
her levelheaded greens
and gloomy storm cloud blues.
And all the colors in between
that she perfected
like the steady stroke
of a brush
were gone,
never to be seen
again.
The hand that was protecting the flame
glowing bright inside of her had
moved away, allowing harsh
winds to extinguish the
flames into flickering
embers that
were about
to turn to
ash.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
Are you sure you want to delete this comment? This cannot be undone.
Mark this comment as a review? Points will be awarded to the poster.
Your comment was posted, but it wasn’t long enough to count as a review. Reviews need about four complete sentences (at least 250 characters). Try writing another review that explains your thoughts in more detail — the author will appreciate it, and you’ll earn points for it.
125,009 Literary Works • 672,839 Reviews
i really enjoyed reading it, the words were put together really well
What a lovely metaphor
I really like the final stanza of this, and the idea of colours being wiped off someone's face like paint. That said, though, I think it started to get a little tired by the third stanza and was stretched out a little too much, so you might want to think about compressing some of the images together so that it doesn't feel so unweildy. ou also might want to watch the abundance of commas that seem to be congregating at the end of each line XD
Otherwise, an interesting piece. Kudos
Good luck with NaPoWriMo!
Cheers,
~bubbles