Anorexia.
Anorexia, explained by Wikipedia, is: “an eating disorder characterized by immoderate food restriction and irrational fear of gaining weight, as well as a distorted body self-perception. It typically involves excessive weight loss and usually occurs more in females than in males. Because of the fear of gaining weight, people with this disorder restrict the amount of food they consume.”
Ana.
The taunting voices in the back of your mind. That twisted image you see in the mirror every single day.
You don’t want to lose your ‘amazing’ friend Ana.
But, even though she may seem amazing, she’s hurting you.
She’s the one taunting you. She’s the one telling you you’re fat and need to lose weight when others can see your ribcage through your skin.
She’s the enemy.
I swear on my life that she is. And I’m here to help you. We’re here to help you.
Try and eat something very small every day. Try and ignore the voices. Go to a doctor, a therapist, something.
I need you to try. Definitely not for me, but for yourself.
Because if you keep going, Ana will keep 'helping' you until it’s too late.
And I want to keep you here. I want you to defeat her.
Ana is not your friend.
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I have a love hate relationship with her
. I hope this isn't about a personal experience because it's utter BS (the experience, not the essay). This is so motivational and I think I'll read it whenever I feel weird about food. You actually captured that ED really well, especially the "The taunting voices in the back of your mind. That twisted image you see in the mirror every single day.". That's gold, girl.
This is fantastic. As someone with experience, i can say that this is accurate as well as brilliant.
Anorexia isn't a topic I'm too good on, because I can't relate to it, but I've looked at experiences and the like. Thanks for your criticism!
You have a really good voice in this and you make great points, however there are some slight flaws. Overall this was written really well, but you have to touch the reader's heart. Don't just write to someone with ana, write to everyone. Bring sorrow and hope to people's hearts, that this isn't a good thing like it may seem, but there is a light that you can find. Of course it doesn't have to just do with thinking one is fat, that is one of the mainer reasons though. This is also, in a sense, a mental and/or emotional condition. But that's just me talking. I would love to hear more of your thoughts on this though. I really think that would make this piece. Overall though, great job!
Sushi
Hey there! Nice topic..
But I think it would shine much better if it was a poem as the way you wrote does not quite match(?) with how you write any essay or topic. Anyways, I am really grateful to you for bringing out such an important topic. I loved how you described everything and you really made me think about it. I felt as I could understand what and how these people with it thinks!
And it strangely made me able to relate to this:)
Good job! But I can't help but wish that this were a poem or a short story..Never mind that! Keep writing and I am sure you will get the hang of it! ^^~
Hello!
This one sentence, was very powerful, but I think the flow felt a little off. I think you need the word "that" before "you're fat" and/or "need to lose weight." (In the case of the later, you would have to put "that you" of course.)I'm not quite sure how to review an essay type of thing, but I'll do my best!
I like how you started off with the definition, but I feel like if you're going to use a quote from another source that's that long, your own words have to be longer. I think the length of of your words is fine, but maybe you should cut the quote size down. I think that ending the quote with the "as well as a distorted body self-perception" would give people enough background information.
I like how you shortened and thus personified "anorexia" to "Ana." That was very effective.
The way you wrote this, or maybe it was just the way I read this, seemed to be telling them to eat even less. I think it would work better if you wrote "Try to eat something, however small, every single day." I think that would get your meaning across better.
Your ending is just *perfect.* It really drives the point home. If I was prone to crying, I'd probably be weeping. As it is, emotion really swept through me. That was really nice.
That's all I have. I really liked this. This wasn't an essay like I was expecting: it was infinitely better.
Great job, keep writing!
~fortis
Hey there cupcakenx!
Hey, I love the theme of your story. Anorexia is a serious issue and I'm glad that you wrote about it. I loved your story.
I love how you gave advise to anorexic people, how you personalized anorexia as "Ana".
My favorite line was:
"She’s the one taunting you. She’s the one telling you you’re fat and need to lose weight when others can see your ribcage through your skin.
She’s the enemy."
You did good job portraying a serious issue like anorexia. You're amazing.
Keep writing,
~ Gigi
P.S. Do you mind if I put this on my blog? It's okay, I'll include your name and the link to this story. Here's the link to my blog: http://ooopsiatethecookie.tumblr.com/
The fact that you have a tumblr is amazing, so yes.
Okay. :3 Thank you!
Sorry, this comment was a mistake :S