Young Writers Society


12+ Violence Mature Content

Witch’s Wonder, Hell’s Hate: Part Seven

*This story is underneath my folder titled “Witch’s Wonder, Hell’s Hate”. Gacha Club character designs are under my forum titled “My character designs<33[2]”. Enjoy!*

I’ve finished stitching up my neck and now, I’m following the voice, Joseph right next to me, Michelle behind me. The boy’s disembodied voice gets louder and louder until I can see what its owner looks like, until I’m face to face with him.

He looks like he’s sixteen, like me and Joseph. His long, blond hair is tied up in a braid, his blue eyes shine with tears, and his clothes are covered in dirt and blood. I see that the skin on his hands are peeling off, that it looks like it’s cracked with blood.

His eyes go wide and he sputters, with cracked lips:

“None of you are Leslie…who-who are you?!”

“I should be asking you the same question. How do you know my friend’s name?” I ask, because she’s never told me about a boy before. Wouldn’t she have talked to me about it? We talked about a lot of things together.

“I’m Isaiah. I’m her boyfriend. She and I used to meet out in the woods before I-“

“Before you went to Hell? How did you get here?” Joseph asks, his tone raised in something that’s between anger and fear.

That was the same question I asked Michelle before and she said that she just followed the portal. Are portals to Hell opening wherever? Why is he bloody? Is Isaiah even human like he says he is?

Will any of this ever make sense?

“I was waiting for Leslie in the woods, to talk to her and when I saw her running, I followed her. I followed her into a glowing green portal and when I jumped in…some strange creature that was a cross between a clown, a snake, a spider, and a puppet attacked me! I…I can’t quite describe it…its white eyes glared at me maddeningly…it broke through my skin…and it just left! If you can help me…it would be greatly appreciated. I don’t want to die here, in the dark.”

He said that he loved Leslie, that he was her boyfriend…there were times I saw a flash of guilt in her eyes, like she felt bad about something and there were nights I’d hear her door open, but I didn’t think anything of it…

Why would she be afraid to tell me?

“My Mom delved into dark magic, she made me a vampire and so, I don’t sense anything supernatural about you, Isaiah. But that doesn’t mean we won’t watch you closely.” Joseph says, that same anger and fear in his tone…it’s wariness. He’s being wary.

I can’t help but feel a rush of joy inside me at the fact that Joseph cares so much about me and Michelle. He’s promising to keep him in check even though we just met him, because while low, there’s still a chance he could be against us.

It makes me feel better about healing him with my powers. Like I’m not setting myself up for danger.

I do what I did to myself before and imagine Isaiah’s skin stitching itself back together, the blood cuts disappearing, flesh made anew.

It takes some time, but it works and the light returns in his eyes. Isaiah gets up and joins us on our pursuit for Leslie.

I’m beginning to wonder just how long it will take for us to find her. I hope I haven’t been down here too long.

………………………………………………………………

My head swirls as I walk, my eyes flitting back to Isaiah every few seconds. I still can’t believe that Leslie had a boyfriend, because she just seemed so shy and lace-like quiet that to fathom her with a boyfriend seemed absolutely impossible. While I’m upset that she didn’t say anything to me, I’m also a little worried. Why would she need to hide this from me? It’s not like how my Mom hid much of her life from me.

My Mom…

My surroundings get blurrier and blurrier the more that I walk, until I’m not in Hell anymore, but back in that cozy parlor room, where my Mom and Queen Lanria sit on the couch, hands on their laps as though they weren’t just talking about sacrificing their friend, and a woman goes into the room with a tray of sugar cookies, her pale skin tinted yellow, her blue eyes surrounded by deep, dark purple rings and her dark brown hair loosely tied in a braid.

“I-I wore a cloth mask so I wouldn’t-“ She coughs before abruptly putting the tray on the table. “So I wouldn’t cough on it. But I did now! I’m..I’m sorry…so…sorry.”

The woman sits down on an armchair that is a few feet away from them. There’s a flicker of guilt in her blue eyes and also, a gauze-sheen of tears in them, but she leans back on the armchair as though she’s tired, as though she just wants to sleep.

Perhaps she does.

“That’s quite alright, Sylvie. Lanria is going to cure you tonight.” Mom says, her eyes flicking over to the plate of cookies in disgust.

“Really?” Sylvie asks. Light comes to her blue eyes and my heart stings at how she doesn’t notice the way Mom and Queen Lanria are looking at the cookies, how they seem to look at her the same way.

“That’s right. I’m going to use my magic to heal you and you’ll be better in no time! The three of us will meet at my palace garden four o clock at night! There will be nobody around to bother us and you, Sylvie, will be saved.” Queen Lanria smiles.

Sylvie smiles back at her, her eyes glittering with clear trust and I have to wonder if all of my trust is going to ruin me, if I should have ever confided in Joseph’s russet brown eyes, if-

“Look! I found a hand!” Michelle’s voice cries out.

I’m back in Hell, away from the memory, Joseph and Isaiah next to me, but…where’s Michelle?

What hand did she find?

Comments & reviews · 3
Note: You are not logged in, but you can still leave a comment or review. Before it shows up, a moderator will need to approve your comment (this is only a safeguard against spambots). Leave your email if you would like to be notified when your message is approved.

User avatar
keystrings
Review

Hi there!

I find it very interesting to think about two generations — with the main character now and her friends/acquaintances in Hell as well as her mother and another parent sacrificing a friend. Comparing both of these situations makes me curious about what has happened in the past for the MC to teach this moment as well as wha the consequences have come from the previous adults’ actions.

I really like the description with how the MC views Isaiah, this boyfriend she has never heard of until now, and how seeing this dirty, blood-covered potentially human teenager like herself has been stuck in this place. Not to mention, we can assume that the mentioned Leslie is the reason why he’s there. I like the flashback and the recollection of how Leslie has been acting up until now — seems realistic for teenagers to be rapidly thinking through everything that has happened so far in until now.

I would say to focus on building more foreshadowing/hinting at parallels between the past and the present, especially in a story built around terrible deeds and exploring Hell. I know you wrote one more chapter of this so I will check it out later as well to see what was added about the hand! Really liked how you ended this chapter.

- keystrings

User avatar
Tikaya
Review
Tikaya wrote a review · Wed Nov 26, 2025 8:52 am

I really like the beginning of the chapter. I felt like you slowed down enough to describe everything properly and I’m ready to learn more about Isaiah!

Oh new lore on the visions dropped. I’m trying to figure out what causes them so new data point =D

…they tricked poor Sylvie into coming there. I must say, Joseph’s mom has a very odd view on what “curing” ppl means.
I really like that Anna draws a parallel between Sylvie’s unconditional trust that lead to her doom/being sacrificed and Joseph, rightly thinking probably that he is the son of his mom. But at the same time, she’s also the daughter of her evil mom so maybe it all balances out.

Now I also want to know what kinda hand they found. You need to write more =D



Every time I’ve gotten feedback that was hard to take it was usually hard to take because there was truth in it and I didn’t like that (or didn’t want to receive it). That’s not to say all harsh feedback is good or that we should be harsh for harshness’ sake, but learning to absorb truth without letting it break your inner core/break you is a lifelong skill that keeps your mind elastic and open to learning.
— soundofmind