I wrote this at midnight last night, after one of those thoughts that sometimes resolves itself into a poem around the witching hour. Its not brilliant, but I like the concept. What dyou think?
Divine Inspiration
There are unicorns in my mind
They dwell in forests growing there
Crowned by wreaths of pretty thoughts
And beautiful beyond compare
They come like diamonds in the night
And steal my sleep with pleasant dreams
They glow with faerie phosphoresce
And leap amidst the tumbling streams
And once or twice I catch a glimpse
Of cloven hoof and pure-white mane -
Then they are gone, and I am left
And then my mind is dull again.
But if I wait in clover-beds
Beside a waterfall of thought
Through veiled lids I might bespy
A longer look than what I ought
A velvet muzzle, whisker-soft -
An arching crest and gentle eye,
The scent of buttercups in spring;
I catch my breath and give a sigh
Thus - faster than a dream, they flee
Back to the forests of my mind
And I wait, 'til I may glimpse again
These messengers of the divine.
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i love this poem. and somehow its the kind of poem i personally appreciate- romantic, full of tender images and of course its like the fond thought which we all can relate to. i liked it. and feel that its one of the most poignant poems i have read so far in this site.
nice work!
-torsa
I don't like the word, "phosphoresce" (which is entirely expected of me, no?)
Other than that! Pretty good. Very lyrical.
Wow. You are very good at poetry, lol. Usually I don't like pieces about unicorns and such, because few are well-written. However, you made the subject mature and innocent at the same time... Very nice.
WOW!! awesome!! lovely rythym, great imagery... the mood is so whimsical and frolicking. i love the line" they glow with faerie phospherescence." i wish i had written this. awesome job.
Beautiful. It reminds me of Francesca Lia Block's Primavera. A book I highly recommend to any and all teen poets. I'm sure there are flaws, but I won't be pointing them out in this post. I'll critique it further when I have more time...I'd like to help you polish this! Is so pretty!!
*looks in awe* like that! like that lot's (look how bad my speach is in comparison!) Good ideas also come anytime you don't have the means to write them down... like during assembly.
This is a lovely poem, and beautifully written.
Typical.
Don't the best poems come during the middle of the night? That, and in the shower.
I love it!
~Skye Demon
Ahhh! Why are you so good at poetry!
I hate and love you being really good at the same time.
Nice poem, by the way, if you couldn't guess!