A Dramatic End (very very short story)

Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),

Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!

Anyway let's get right to it,

This is the end of my life. I stare off into the distance, squinting from the bright light. It has to end now, that's how it's supposed to be. I can't go on any longer; my life is over. Somebody may cry for me, I hope. It has to end this way; there is no other choice.

I grab a single bullet from a nearby box, and load it into the gun. I raise it to my face, but I pause. There has to be some other way to go on with my life. I think for a moment, then my decision is final. Once again I raise the gun to my beautiful face, and stare down the barrel. It's so dark; but I know what's inside. Tears rush to my eyes, I can't hold them back. As they roll down my face, I take a large breath. I close my eyes and slowly cock the weapon; it clicks. The bullet is ready for me, and I for it. My finger slowly reaches aroudn the trigger; my tears have stopped. I straighten up and take one final breath. I pull the trigger, and hear a quick 'boom.' My body collapses onto the wooden floor; I don't move.

I say still for awhile, unaware of what's happening. The lights slowly dim, and it is the end. It turns pitch black, and I can breathe again. Nervous seconds pass by, and then, I hear it. A great sound that I have been yearning to hear, applause. I stand from the floor and face the red velvet. It parts, and I am once again hit by the bright light. I scan the audience with a smile on my face; I have done it. My fellow cast members join me on either side, and we bow together. This is the end, my dramatic end.

Nice and short, I loved it.

I really liked this. It would be an AWESOME opening to a movie.

I liked this story, though I have a faint idea there would be a twist at the end, since most short stories do. Other than that, at the same time, I WAS expecting a suicide, lol.

I'm not too nit-picky myself. I understood what was happaning. But I can make one suggestion. As I was reading, I didn't feel any real emotion from the person holding the weapon. Readers might get more of a shock if you try planting emotions from the charactor, like if you were bout to pull the trigger, what would YOU be thinking? Fear, sadness, confusion? Would the body start to sweat, tense up, shake, ect.

But again, other than that, well done.

LOL! A mí me gusta mucho! A surprise ending that is not the typical, "Omg, my life is so horrible so I have to die." It actually shows... passion! Of performance! Of... yeah. You get the point.

I love the surprise ending. In fact, because of the surprise ending, I actually like the story.

I also like the fact that I can look at it without seeing any huge grammar mistake. If I look at it harder, I may say something different, but otherwise, good work!

This was really good, but I dont know, I had sort of guessed the end. So it wasn't that surprising for me. Anyway, good job!

Wow, thats so funny! I was sure it was going to be depressing, but no! You fooled me aswell.

Wow. You had me fooled too. But I guess that was the goal. Nice job! I really don't have anything to pick on. It was short and sweet.

Yeah that was awesome! You had me fooled too. Really good writing. I'm not so nit-picky so I have no comments other than it was great!

You had me stuck for a bit too! It was sort of relieving to find out it was only a play!!! lol

Very interesting

I love the twist at the end. You had me fooled and relieved at something other than a suicide story. Great job. I also like the title. It really fits, and doesn't give anything away.

Please forgive me for some minor things I noticed in passing. I don't mean to seem didactic. I'm detail oriented. In a play, she may not have put a bullet into the gun. I'm not sure though...It probably doesn't matter. But an option is to just say that you took the gun out of the drawer. Perhaps?

A great sound that I have been yearning to hear, applause.