The weatherman said the summer-heat was record-breaking this year, like we should award it an Olympic medal or something. But the locust, perched on her windowsill, tells me heat isn't relative - but a constant - because even in the night, the sun is always shining on the other half of the planet, it is a pot always almost over-boiling, it is a flower always blooming, it is a fire always on the verge of consuming everything, it just always is, and if it bothers you, just take a moment to float in the river, and you'll soon forget your worry once you're halfway submerged underwater. I would tell the locust that humans don't work that way, that we always need something to compare and something to complain about, that we probably wouldn't be able to survive the winter if we loved the sun that much. But the locust does not have time for me. She is quite busy, as she always is, trying once more to chase the sun. And she doesn't really care how terribly, constantly, wonderfully hot it is outside today.
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125,021 Literary Works • 672,740 Reviews
Thank you for taking the time to read!
Please Note: This poem is written in the form of prose poetry - meaning I intended to write this in a "prose-like" way formatted like a paragraph, rather than using conventional poetic formatting like line-breaks and stanza-breaks. Prose poetry does not necessarily need to adhere to the same grammatical conventions of your typical prose either.
Would love to know what you think; your thoughts / impressions / interpretations!
Such an interesting dialogue! Hey alliyah, this is Alex dropping off a review. I've been looking for some Sun poems to review and this was an amazing find. I must admit, I don't have much experience with reviewing prose but I shall try, nevertheless.
The title, though longer than usual, gives the reader a summarised idea of what it's about. The 'Science' category really made me curious as to how it uses logical reasons to justify poetic claims. I like how the two characters - the locust and the human are painted so contrastingly in their outlooks to heat, it was really fascinating to witness.
Let's first discuss the locust. We find it still rooted to the basics of nature, unlike humans. Heat doesn't affect it much. I'd guess it's so because the locust is more used to staying outdoors in the scorching Sun all the time without any air conditioning. A little like how our bare faces are accustomed to withstand cold better than most of our otherwise covered body in winters. Exposure builds resilience over time. Additionally, I think the fact that they're cold blooded only adds to this perspective of the locust. It can sense cold but doesn't feel it the way we do.
Next comes it's defensiveness towards Sun.
It's clear that the locust is annoyed by the humans unnecessarily whining about how bad things are. It suggests that if we hate the Sun so much, we should try submerging ourselves underwater and see if we think the same about it then. It's an exaggerated satire generalized on taking things for granted until we're on the other side of it. It makes sense on paper but when you think deeply, this argument is hollow. It's kind of like- 'oh you don't like the idea of falling into a volcano? Why don't you try freezing in the Antartica, I'm sure you'll love volcanoes after that'. Both extremes are equally undesirable when you put things into perspective.
One more thing I noticed is that the locust somehow knows too much. I wouldn't expect a locust to know this -
The heat being constant was based on its own experiences, but this is astrophysics and the world outside the Earthly land, beyond the scope of a locust's understanding. It makes me wonder, is the locust a form of the Sun itself? Like the celestial being in an insect's disguise, descended on land to get know humans and their thoughts of the Sun. A little crazy theory but it would explain the enhanced awareness and slightly agitated responses as its taking all the comments made on Sun personally.
On the other hand, the locust is better represented as a passionate devotee of the Sun. The following line strongly suggests it-
This way, the defending lines still make sense and the dialogue maintains a more realistic ground.
Now let's analyse the human character. It doesn't have much for us to go on except him trying to explain things from a human perspective.
Loved the extended irony on the whole of humanity. First we dig a pit and grumble if we slip and fall in it. It's like our go to pastime, indicative of our problematic behaviour.
For some unexplainable reason, this line particularly appealed to me. A thought instantly occurred to me- yet if we hated the Sun any more, we couldn't get through summer. All things require balance. Also, the locust fares well enough in winter, despite its obsession with Sun. Is there a lesson to take here? That we can love something all we want, but we must be able to live without it.
Overall, this was such an insightful conversation. As the human draws farther from the primal style of life, he grows more miserable. Now that we don't spend all those hours under the Sun anymore, we're much more affected by the heat outside. All the hardships of nature rendered us tolerance, something the locust still has. All our free time goes into complaining how tough things have become, when it's us who have gotten weaker. Meanwhile, the locust's day is still full of chores for ensuring it's survival, keeping it occupied and preventing it from overthinking of its struggles. It doesn't have time to spare and this consuming action keeps it in shape and away from vain complaining. This prose was an absolute pleasure to review, I hope I get to read and review more from you soon!
Regards
Alex
Howdy hey! Gengar here to leave a review (I'm on mobile tho so rip T-T)
This is probably my first exposure to prose poetry, and now I think it's very cool! I may look into some more or make some of my own.
I like how the run-on sentence makes it feel like an actual conversation, because conversations don't often adhere perfectly to the rules of grammar.
The way I interpreted this is that we're constantly trying to be better. Like, people don't just stop once they reach a big goal or achieve something--they are always moving forward.
Keep up the good work, and have a good day / night!
--GengarIsBestBoy
Hey there! First off, I am unfamiliar with prose poetry, so you taught me something! Second, I love your avatar. Our names start with the same letter
On to my review...
1) This evoked such vivid imagery for me! You use a lot of great descriptions and metaphors that really bring this to life. I really appreciated the portion that follows 'because even in the night' to 'consuming everything.'
2) The repetitive use of the word "always" really pushes this forward in terms of giving it cohesivity. I count it five times, and that repeated use in succession, as well as toward the end, in a very similar yet different format gave this a predictability that made reading it easier while still being entertaining
3) I am always one to read between the lines, and with italics, bolding things, or underlining things, I find that when they are done with purpose and intentionality, they really allow for a work to be heightened. I noticed that the words 'constant' and 'always' (which is twice) are italicized. I'm not sure if you did this on purpose to reflect or stress these words, but in the phrases/sentences they are in, they had me reading this with inflection and intonation that brought those words to the forefront further.
4) I must say this makes me wish I was a locust LOL. Great read!!
Take care wherever you are in the world!
Thanks for the terrific review! Helpful observations ~
You're right the "always is" being italicized twice was intentional to amplify the parallelism between the sun and the locust - the sun "always is" and the locust also "always is" - my intention was to make the reader wonder if the locust was the sun, or a metaphor for the sun, and to amplify the difference/contrast between the locust & sun and the human perspective.
Good catch, seeing the repetition there! I'm glad you enjoyed - and I also agree A is the best letter there is. Have a good day!