DO THEY EXIST?
The world is such a blissful place
For a little one swinging in his cradle
Or a small grown-up who looks up at the sky
In the hope of seeing them
Yes, for him, they exist.
The world is such an exciting place
For a young child learning so much anew
But sometimes ends up in trouble
And prays to them to save him
As he is almost certain that they exist.
The world is such a confusing place
For a teen who wants so many things
Apart from that most beautiful girl
But his prayers to them somehow go unanswered
And he seriously wonders if they exist.
The world is such a depressing place
For a college guy who is so worried for his future
Because of so many hardships thrown at his way
And having all hopes of help from them vanished
He openly declares that they don't exist.
The world is such a tiring place
For a middle-aged man working day and night
Just to keep his family happy and safe
But when they are sick he prays to them
Though still not sure if they exist.
The world is such a peaceful place
For a man just retired having finished all his tasks
Now calmly enjoys the sun's warmth
And having nothing much to do links up with them
He, without a doubt, believes that they exist.
The world is such a stupid place
For a sick man about to meet his end
Who finally realizes that everyone has a script to read
The wise fellow having lived with and without them understands
That it is the same if they do or they don't really exist.
Points:
Time spent:
Canary word: Present
Possible AI signals:
Original Text:
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125,007 Literary Works • 672,815 Reviews
This poem was amazing! I tapped on it, expecting a dumb alien story or something, but I was soooo wrong! I loved how you wrote it (incredibly well) and it is formatted very nicely. You write in a very unique style, but a lot of the story didn't seem like it was important to the plot. The ending was incredible, I really enjoyed it! You were able to explain different perspectives very well, I don't think I could ever do that on my own! Your grammar, spelling, and punctuation was wonderful. Keep on writing and Merry (early) Christmas!
Thank you so much
I walked into this expecting it to be some stupid alien story. Boy, was I wrong! This poem is incredibly developed and well written. I adore the unique style that this poem was written in. The idea of it hopping between different perspectives make the majority of the poem seem a little bit like filler material, but it is all worth it, because of that amazing ending.
It's really cool how you are able to explain perspectives from all these different types of people. While it does not any rhyme scheme, but an incredible structure. It all lines up leading you right to the ending, which is the ultimate idea.
I honestly don't know how you could make this poem any better. It already gets the job done, and well at that. Even if some people give you suggestions on what to do differently, I don't think you should take it to heart because this already seems perfect in your own style.
Great work! Keep it up!
Thanks a lot