Another Candle & Another Year

If this is your first poem, wow, great job!
You did a really good job capturing the feeling of growing up and getting older. The feeling of, in a way, saying goodbye to your childhood.

You last couple lines really captured that and put it into perspective.
"I wish I had cherished the moments I had
For I am leaving on my own and starting anew."

If you don't live every moment like its your last, your going to regret that for the rest of your life. All the times that you could have spent with family, but you didn't, your going to regret that when you can't do that anymore.

My favorite lines were in the middle:
"Another year gone, where has it all gone?
My innocence fading, going on can be hard
No longer a child my heart feels it all."

You growing up and there's nothing you can do about it. The years are adding up, and you don't really know what s going to happen next, because life's and adventure.


One thing that I want to say is that you should try making the number of syllables between lines the same. Or maybe try to have a little bit of a rhythm in it to make it a easier read. You don't have to listen to anything I say though.

Again, this being your first try, you did a great job! Thanks so much for sharing, can't wait to read what you write next.

Carpe diem,
LUNARGIRL

Wow!
For your first time writing poetry, I'm super-duper impressed.
A lot of the poetry I like the most is about growing up, and this piece encapsulates it very nicely.
My favorite lines are the last two;

"I wish I had cherished the moments I had

For I am leaving on my own and starting anew"

Too often, we kids can't wait to grow up and start lives on our own and not have to be told what to do. I know I think about it way too often; this piece really hits home that being a child, and the memories you have should always be considered sacred.

Again, this is a beautiful piece, and I hope to see more of your work on here.

Cheers!

-MintyLeaf <3

This is a great poem, especially for your first try. It does a very nice job of capturing that feeling of growing up and the nostalgia for your childhood.

I especially enjoyed the last few lines, which really express that nostalgia and wishing you had enjoyed your childhood as much as possible.

If I had to critique it, I would recommend you try and make the number of syllables between lines either about the same or maybe try a sort of rhythm with a long line, then a short line. It could help it flow with a more steady rhythm. Of course, if you don't like to do this, it's great already! And as you write more poetry, you can experiment with different styles of writing them.

Overall, I really liked it and you did a great job especially for a first attempt! Keep writing <3