Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!
Anyway let's get right to it,
My lungs exhaled, catapulting my breath into the frozen winter air. The white silky stream twists and turns, dancing a beautiful yet saddening dance until it dissipates towards the heavens. A lonely existence. Much like my own.
I gazed up towards the sky, wondering want made the air so cold and cranky. It seems as if the Sun was oversleeping. Decided to take a random sick day because it didn't feel like coming to work. To warm up the air like the steam of a fresh brew cup of coffee. To work for as long as the world allowed it. Maybe the Moon wanted to work overtime. Since the Sun work 18 hours yesterday, the Moon might have thought that it was it's turn. That it should step up and help out the Sun, finally pay him up for all that Sun has done for him.
Hmm, this is an interesting little ramble of sorts here, and I mean that in a good way. There are rambly bits you don't want to see in a story, especially at the start of one, but this is the good sort of ramble that catches your attention as a reader and makes for a pretty fun little opening part here I think.
Selfish. Both of them are. There is going to be a time when the Sun will be out longer then the Moon yes, but there is also the vise-versa. When that happens what are you going to do Moon? Just stay asleep and let the Sun take care of it? Say that he owes you for when you worked overtime for him. Since you helped him out, might as well get him to help you? Don't think I forgot about you Sun. You think that you can just rely on her to pick up your slack? To clean your mess? That's selfish. On this world, if you're late you don't just hurt yourself but all the people around you.
I am loving this little piece here as it develops. The Sun and the Moon being talked of as living things while I think also hinting at what seems to be a rather interesting moral message there to humans in general makes for a really fun read here and in general, this is proving to be a rather wholesome little piece that despite its short length has a pretty deep meaning.
Because you didn't want to wake up Sun, the Air got cold due to the excess amount of exposure of the Moon and never got warmed up. Because the Air got cold, the morning tunes of the early birds were silenced as they flew towards a warmer atmosphere. Because the early birds migrated away, the Air got lonely and decided to breath down on the worlds just to get a few moments where he felt as if something could interact with him. Because of all this, my body is shivering. My nose is running. My teeth are chattering. My hands are cracking. My chin is losing all feeling of itself. So please, do yourself a favor and get up Sun. Though I love the Moon and her chilling touch, I also love you Sun and your warm embrance.
Okay this then twisted into something that almost sounds like what a fairly young child would say. That is certainly quite something I think and it goes from that deeper meaning, which I do think still lingers, to this other feeling where its just some pure wholesomeness there especially towards the very end with that particular declaration. Overall, I think its just a lovely piece that epitomizes short and sweet.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Points: 253238
Reviews: 4095
Donate