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Young Writers Society


12+

The Only One: Chapter 1 (Rough Draft)

by TimmyAlly


Chapter 1

My name is Castiel Algloria and I woke up with this unexplainable feeling coursing through my body that my life was going to change forever.

My alarm clock was still wailing it’s annoying buzzing, trying to tell me that the start of my day was to begin at that very second. That I was to wake from my slumber, jump out of my bed, and begin the day with a smile etched on my face. In a perfect world, I guess that is what was supposed to happen. But we don’t live in a perfect world, we don’t have the perfect life, and perfection is just an unachievable idea created through the minds of imperfect people. So instead of getting up, I just laid there, listening to the stinging sound of my alarm.

I was drowning in my ocean of blankets. It was another frozen night. It has been an entire month of frozen nights. Nights where you just want to sit next to a fireplace with a blanket to warm your body, hot chocolate to warm your soul, sitting with your family, laughing at all the bad jokes that your dad says. Well, that is if you do have a family.

Finally I complied to the authority that is my alarm and found the strength and endurance to slam the snooze button on my clock but quickly found myself engulfed in my blankets once again. The palm of my hands were beginning to have a slight burning sensation to them but it went away as fast as it came. It was weird, it was like someone poked a hot needle in the middle of my hand.

The clock tells me that it is 5 in the morning but anyone could mistake it for 10 at night. The moon and the stars seem to want to take the morning off I guess. During this time, the birds would usually start to wake up at this time and sing their morning tunes, but the cold bullied them off. I liked the birds, they seemed to bring so much energy and life to this lifeless place. Their songs would make the trees dance and the flowers smile. It even scarred a smile on my face once in a while. I miss the birds. Why couldn’t they be here to wish me a ‘Happy Birthday’ their way? I guess they must of forgotten, like everyone else will.

I got out of my bed and looked into my closet. Of course I forgot to fold my clothes last night. I pulled on a pair of tattered jeans, some gold shirt I didn’t even know that I possessed, and a green hoodie. I also go the only pair of socks that I had and slipped them on. At that point, my stomach decided to yell at me until I feed it something, anything at this point. So my body seem to automatically roam to the kitchen.

My apartment wasn’t a huge place but I wouldn’t say that it was super tiny either. It was pretty much two rooms, one room with a single sized bed and a closet, and the other room with everything else. I would say that it was a mixture between a kitchen, living, bathroom, and dining room all in one. I possessed the necessities (stove, sink, dishwasher, oven, microwave) but nothing more than that. Then there was my table. I couldn’t find a chair that in 10 years I would still be happy to sit in, so I went with a couch as a substitute. There was also T.V. set on the table. I couldn’t afford cable and all that other jazz so all I would watch on the T.V. was a mixture of Gladiator, Braveheart, and Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. And in a small corner of the room was the bathroom. However, there was something different about the kitchen. Something was off. I opened up the refrigerator and found out that there was a cake and a note waiting for me.

I looked over to the oven. It was already 5:30 and I had to get to my bus stop in 30 minutes. I slipped the note into my book bag as I didn’t have much time to fully analysis what the note had to say to me. Then there was the cake, which was already cut into 14 equal pieces. I pulled it out of the fridge and placed it on the table. It stated Happy 16th Birthday from the Browns. I guess somebody did remember my birthday. A piece was placed onto one of my many paper plates. It was red velvet cake with a cream frosting, my favorite kind of cake. At least the

The slice of cake was so delectable that it almost brought me to tears, but now it is 5:40 and I needed to get to the bus stop. I cleared out my eyes, quickly put the cake back into the refrigerator, slipped on my shoes, launched my book bag over my shoulder, and rushed out the door. If I sprinted to the bus stop, I might have time to speak with Darrel.

Coming from a sprint to a complete stop is a skill that I seem to perfected. I made it at the stop with about 5 extra minutes, so I decided to go to the gas station across the street. I was so glad that Darrel was inside when I came through the door.

“Whats hanging Darrel?”, I stated as I waltz into the door.

“You think that just because you work here, you’re able to just waltz in whenever you please.” He retorted with the most serious face that I have seen on a man, and I have seen Braveheart at least 12 times.

That statement cause me to stop where I was as I starred at my feet, not being able to look him in the eyes. Then I heard him laugh.

“You thought that I was serious?! Man you are too gullible. I’m doing good. You going to be at work after school?” He stated back with a huge grin on his face.

The only expression on my face was that of a murderer looking at his next target. I was looking savage. He still had the audacity to keep laughing at me, saying that it was all a joke. This happened to the point where he was just quiet, asking if I was mad and stuff. That was when my composure broke and I started cracking up. At that point, we were both dying of laughter, so much so that my lungs felt like they were going to burst.

“Yeah, I’ll be here after school. Well, I mean it depends on whether or not my bus driver is going to drop me off on time or not, but I plan to be here. There is no place I would rather be. Well, other than my apartment.” I said after the laugher seemed to cool down a little.

“So I see where I am on your priority list. Ok, just come when you can.” Darrel stated, though I knew that he was somewhat kidding.

“My bus is probably going to be here soon. You mind if I can get a Monster?”

“Sure, go ahead. Oh, and Happy Birthday Cassy.”

He remembered. “Thanks.”

By the time that I got the Monster and walked back to the bus stop, the bus was coming down the road. At that point, my palms started to burn again. It seemed to have been more intense and slightly longer. I almost dropped my birthday gift.

The one place that I wanted to be right now is back in my apartment, not here, where people keep telling me what I already knew and call it “teaching”. The place was clean and there have been no drug busts or anything this year. All you would hear was the sound of shouting of teenagers gossiping over who is the hottest guy or something about sports. It was never a quiet school and there seemed to never be a dull moment. But even through all the shouting and screaming, I seem to have sense, something from the lockers down the hall. Something that felt like someone needed help Stop, it’s not your business. Don’t go down there. You have your own problems to deal with. You don’t need to fix other people’s problems. In that moment, I felt more feline that I have ever felt before. Curiosity got the better of me. As I was walking down there, I already knew what was going on.

“So I heard that you have something for me?”

“Something… for you. I don’t have anything.”

“Stop lying to me. I know you have it.”

“Have what?!”

“Do you really need me to beat it out of you?”

“I don’t have anything that is even remotely yours Jack.”

“Come on Smitty. You don’t want a broken nose again do you?”

“Just leave me alone. I don’t have whatever it is you want.”

“I guess that I am going to have to beat it out of you then, punk.”

At that point, I couldn’t let it on any longer. I had to step in. How do I expect someone to do that for me if I can’t do it for someone else? A man is not defined but his thoughts but by his actions. Even in an imperfect world, without justice what are we but just chaos? I increased my speed just before Jack’s hand hit his face. I guess I did become a cat because I had the speed of one too. I caught his fist just in time.

“Stop. He doesn’t have what you want Jack.”

“Get out of here Sophomore. Unless you want a beating too.”

“Just because you’re a Senior, it doesn’t give you the right to start beating on kids in lower grades. You obviously got the wrong person, leave Smitty alone.”

I could feel that Jack started to unclench his fist, so I let his hand go. He immediately started to shake that hand. I looked over at Smitty, who was shaking a little and there were tears welling up in his eyes. He glasses fell in the floor. Good thing there wasn’t a scratch on them. I picked them up and gave it to Smitty.

“Smitty, get out of here.”

“Thanks Cassy, I owe you one.”

He grabbed his books and his pencils that he needed from his locker, closed it, and swiftly jolted to his first period.

“Now you need a girl to fight your battles Smitty? Oh wait, I know who you are Sophty. You’re Castiel, that precious little girl who lost both of her parents. Guess like they paid the price for giving birth to such a…”

He fell to the floor, spit flying through the air, gasping for the little air he could get. His eyes were getting red. I got him good. There was so many people that nobody even noticed I hit him, they just saw that he collapsed.

Kneeling down, I whispered some motivating life lessons into his ear. “Stop the whole big man act. And never talk about my parents again. Ever.” Smiling, I got up and started to walk away.

English was such a breeze. All Mrs. Galadon did was give us the entire 45 minutes of class to write a paper on the prompt ‘If you had the chance to change one thing in history, what would it be.’ I destroyed that paper, saying that the one thing I would change is spending all the time I could with my family, no matter how little we had. When I finished, I gave it to the teacher. When I got back to my seat, I suddenly remembered the note from this morning. I got my book bag, which only seemed to house some papers and the note. It was in a red envelope.

“Happy Birthday Cass. I know that we haven’t visited you much after your parents, well you know. Anyways, we hope that you have an amazing 16th birthday and keep up that gorgeous smile. From the Brown’s.”

The note made my eyes water a little. The Browns were the parents I forgot I had. They helped me through that hard part in my life and I don’t even want to imagine where I would be if Paul and Cindy Brown didn’t come and take care of me. When I finished reading the note, Mrs. Galadon called me up to her desk.

“Castiel, is this a joke?”

“What? You don’t like it? You couldn’t have read the entire thing that fast.”

“I couldn’t read it at all. All you wrote was a bunch of scribble nonsense. If you want to just waste my time, you could just leave the classroom.”

“But I didn’t write in…”

She showed me the paper, and she was right. It was a bunch of scribbles, like an ancient language or something, but I could understand it just fine.

“I’m sorry Mrs. Galadon, can I rewrite…”

At that moment the bell rang and people were already leaving the classroom. Mrs. Galadon sighed as she looked over at my paper once again.

“Just bring me a paper written in English tomorrow ok?”

“Thanks Mrs. Galadon, you are the best!”

“Oh, and this is my birthday present to you.”

I didn’t even know so many people knew it was my birthday. I am genially surprised. I don’t know why, but it was such a great relief that people actually knew that I was born today. I guess it just makes me feel that there are people that care about me.

As I walked out of class, Jack was waiting for me with about 5 of his Senior friends outside Mrs. Galadon’s door. With a big grin on his face, Jack looked to me and said, “What was that about being the big man?”

I knew I was in trouble, that there was going to be a fight right now. I guess I deserve it. After all, I did lose my anger for no particular purpose I guess. I mean I should be used to the fact that my parents were dead right? It should matter what anyone else calls them, because in my book they were both great parents when they were here and that is the only book that matters to me. Anyways, enough of that, I have a fight to get ready for. I pulled up my arms, ready to block any attack that might come my way. Then my palms started to burn with such intensity that it caused me to collapse to the ground. The pain of the kicks didn’t compare the pain that I was feeling in my hands. It took security 5 minutes to get them off of me, in which all of us were taken to the principal’s office.

The pain in my palms didn’t hurt anymore, but everywhere else on my body was in throbbing pain. Jack and his 5 friends just walked out of the principal’s office. He gave me a stare of revenge as he walked past, but I knew he wouldn’t do anything. Underneath that bully exterior is a guy who doesn’t want to get in trouble again. Mr. Leyflair called me in.

“What happened? Why did you punch Jack in the gut this morning?”

“Because he was beating on Smitty.”

“He didn’t even lay a hand on Smitty.”

“There are other ways you could beat on someone with the use of violence Mr. Leyflair.”

“But that is something you should report to me, not go out and punch the kid. All he is going to do is retaliate later.”

“If I tried to stop that conversation any later, Smitty would have a bloody nose. I was trying to help the kid.”

“By beating up on another?”

“I was stopping a violent and an act of bullying.”

“You can’t try to defend the rules by breaking them.”

“You can if the rules are flawed.”

“Ms. Algloria, It seems to me that you believe that you are the sole determiner of which rules are right and wrong.”

“I never said anything to that nature. I am just saying that if there is a rule that is stopping me from helping another person, especially in a violent act, then it shouldn’t be a rule.”

“But you stopped Jack when you go in the middle. You didn’t have to punch him.”

“Yes, I did.”

“I don’t see your reasoning.”

“If I didn’t punch Jack, he would have just gotten back to Smitty later during the day. I won that fight, but I had to make sure that I won the war.”

“But instead he attacked you, which is understandable.”

“Wait, so you’re saying that it is my fault that he went out and beat me up?”

“I’m saying that you forced his hand. He does have a reputation to upkeep, and being beaten up by a girl doesn’t help him. So yes, that is precisely what I am saying.”

“So I am going to get in trouble and he is going to go get away free?”

“Of course not, you’re both going to be in deep crap when I am done. Why did you collapse on the floor?”

“What?”

“When Jack met up with you in front of Mrs. Galadon’s door, he said you just collapse and that was when he started to beat on you. Why did you collapse on the floor?”

“I’ve been having some pain in my palms. What does that have to do with me getting in trouble?”

“Let me see.”

“What, why?”

“Just let me see.”

“Look, my bodily pains has nothing to do with my I punched Jack in the gut or why he beat me…”

“Just let me see your hands Castiel!”

I can’t believe you are about to do this. I laid my hands out palms up on his desk. He went and started to rub the palm of my hand, which I found pretty strange. He also started to make weird noises underneath his breath, saying that he has found the one or something to that nature. Then he reached for something underneath his desk while he was still rubbing down my palm.

“Um, ok this is kind of creepy. Please stop.”

I tried to move my hand off the table, but he grabbed my right wrist with an immense amount of strength, and I kind of pride myself on my muscular ability, I mean that of being a girl and all. I pulled as hard I as I could, but it wouldn’t budge. My brain was in such a mess that it couldn’t figure out what to do. He finally got what he needed from underneath his desk, some rusted old dagger. In that moment, I have never been so scared that I was going to die ever in my life. My brain was still dead, not able to produce a single way to get out. That was when someone busted through the door. I didn’t have time to turn around and by the time that I tried to turn around, Mr. Leyflair was already blasted back, engulfed in a blazing fire that was burning down his office. You could hear his cry for help, his screams of agony.

Finally I turned around and standing there, holding some sort of stick with glowing engravings on it, was Smitty. “I said I owed you one.”

I’m so confused and didn’t know what was happening. Then my palms began to burn again. Not again. I was only awake for a few seconds before the pain passed me out, and I could see Smitty catching me before I fell out of the chair. Before I went out though, I heard Smitty saying he was going to take me someplace safe.

That was when my life changed forever.               


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18 Reviews


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Tue Apr 07, 2015 3:34 pm
krow02 wrote a review...



I really like this, it is very interesting, and it had my attention the entire time. However there were some spelling mistakes that I saw like at one point where Castiel was talking to Mrs. Galadon you said she was genialy surprised instead of generally. The chapter is very well written and I can't wait to read more. I hope you keep writing and continue your dream.




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498 Reviews


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Sun Apr 05, 2015 11:48 pm
Que wrote a review...



Hello Timmy,
I just wanted to say that this is a very good first chapter, although I caught a number of small errors that I will just write here. They should be fairly easy to fix.

My alarm clock was still wailing it’s annoying buzzing, trying to tell me that the start of my day was to begin at that very second.

There doesn't need to be an apostrophe in its.
It even scarred a smile on my face once in a while.

I'm not sure what you meant here... perhaps scared? Either way, a bit of clarification would be helpful. Maybe coaxed would be a better word.
I also go the only pair of socks that I had and slipped them on.

Go should be got.
So my body seem to automatically roam to the kitchen.

Seem should be seems.
Well, you get the point. Just read through the whole thing very carefully and see how many of these you can catch. They're super small, so it shouldn't take to long.
Overall, this was a really wonderful start to a novel! I hope to read more of this as soon as you write it. Well done!
-Falco




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26 Reviews


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Wed Apr 01, 2015 3:55 pm
restlessheart14 says...



hey I just wanted to let you know this story sounds amazing and has great potential to be a fantasy thriller. Just out for repeating words such as 'stated' and comma splices. I cant wait to see what you do with this :)





I want to do with you what spring does with the cherry trees.
— Pablo Neruda