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Young Writers Society



A very small Potter fanfiction

by Sohini


ATTENTION READERS: I wrote this when I was eleven and then, HP&GOF was the last book. My brother Soham, who was fourteen, then, had helped me with the idea. The writing is childish since I didn’t change it (save a few spelling and grammatical errors which would embarrass me now.)

The Arrival (an enchanting epilogue to the 7th Harry Potter book)

In a far off hill, with towers, tall turrets and flags fluttering in the September breeze, stood the ancient castle of Hogwarts.

The gleaming, scarlet Hogwarts Express came to a loud, screeching halt at the Hogsmeade station. It puffed out a lot of steam before coming to rest. As soon as the train stopped, a big booming voice was heard, “First-years, this way” and golden light from a lantern revealed the speaker. He was enormous; his face was covered by grayish-black beard. His beetle eyes shone brightly. A group of first years, wearing new black robes headed in his direction.

From the train descended the senior students. They walked over to the horseless carriages, which would be taking them to their school.

* * *

There was a buzz of excitement in the Great Hall. Students were seated in their respective houses: Gryffindor, Slytherine, Ravenclaw and Hufflepuff.

A door opened behind the high table and Professor McGonagall entered, carrying something old, tattered, battered and patched at several places-the Sorting Hat. As McGonagall called out the names, the nervous first years came forward and tried on the wise hat. The shouts of the hat rented the Great hall. The students went to their respective house seats.

Silence fell and the babble died away as Professor Dumbledore stood up to address the students. He looked much older, his beard was a few inches longer then it had been last year, but his wrinkled face still had the smile. The all-knowing, twinkling blue eyes behind his half-moon spectacles sparkled brightly. He then cleared his throat and said, “Welcome, welcome students!! …….This year you will be having a very special Defence Against Dark Arts teacher. He needs no introduction-”

Suddenly, behind the staff table apparated a young wizard in black robes (older students gasped: they knew that no one could apparate inside Hogwarts). But our young wizard, being very gifted and skilled, could apparate anywhere: even inside a Gringotts vault!

Everybody stared in perfect silence-bewildered. Most failed to notice a resemblance between the new teacher and the boy who once studied in this great castle.

The teacher had jet black hair. Behind his round glasses were his almond green eyes. Almost all noticed that but they failed to notice that behind the fringe of jet black hair, there was the unmistakable, unforgettable lightning-bolt shaped scar.


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Mon Sep 17, 2007 1:11 am



awwww...i want more.
very nice. i'm impressed. my eleven year old writing wasn't writing, it was sort of plaigerism - combinging C. S. Lewis and J. K. Rowling and Madeleine L'Engle into one book.




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Fri Jul 27, 2007 4:52 pm
RED wrote a review...



I really liked this. It's well done for the writing of an eleven year old. When I was 11 there was no way I could write like this. Granted, there were some things missing [which have already been pointed out] it was well-written, I think.

I really like how you didn't come right out and say "Harry Potter was the new Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher." But you surprised us with the Apparation inside of the school, and described him rather than coming right out and saying it.

Anyway, I know this didn't help with much, but I enjoyed it. Well done!

xoxo
-Caitlin




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Sun Apr 30, 2006 5:43 am
Sohini says...



thank you. yeah, i missed the 'halt'.




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Sat Apr 29, 2006 5:42 pm
_fallingstar_ wrote a review...



Props for posting in the Fanfiction forum. Nobody gets any love over here, and my own fanfiction is sadly being ignored. :(

Anyway... I found the ending more interesting than the beginning. The beginning was pretty much a rehash of the book (meaning, stuff we already know), and it would have been much more interesting if you had dragged out the point of Harry being a teacher a little bit. But other than that, it is a charming epilogue (even though we have no idea how the seventh book is going to end).

There are a few errors that I have to point out, though:

The gleaming, scarlet Hogwarts Express came to a loud, screeching at the Hogsmeade station.


I'm assuming that you mean 'a loud screeching halt' or something of that nature. Also, the first sentence needs a period.

He was enormous; his face was covered by grayish-black beard. His beetle eyes shone brightly.


You could combine both of these sentences like this: 'He was enormous; his face was covered by a grayish-black beard, and his beetle eyes shone brightly.'

There are a few others, but I don't want to be harsh, particularly since you admited that you wrote it when you were eleven. All in all, it is a good concept idea for a fanfiction.





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