you aren't the one i'm mourning

Heya Silver! Incoming review!

I liked this poem. It made me really think. The first thing my mind went to was miscarriages. It could also have another meaning I can't decipher. Anyway, onto the review!

I'll start with critique. Your first two lines start with somewhere and I'm thinking you can change the first one to some day. I say this because the poem is relatively short and there isn't any consistent repetition. I think it would flow better and also make some more sense.

but i am standing among the wildflowers

you think this is your funeral

Silver. I'm sitting here with my mouth wide open in pure, unadulterated awe. This poem is absolutely incredible, haunting, mournful - perfectly written.

The repetition of the word "somewhere" creates a longing, yearning tone in this poem, and the fact that what you're longing for is a chance to bury all these people - it's a whiplash, and immediately draws in the reader.

Every word is so precisely chosen and fits in wonderfully with the rest of the poem to create a story. The reader can't help but wonder what on earth led the narrator to this place, a lovely sense of mystery that is furthered as the poem goes on.

Honestly, no words I say can possibly encapsulate how this poem made me feel. It's absolutely haunting and incredible. GREAT job.

Hi SilverNight, Buranko here to read and review some poetry. No long introductions so here we go

Your poem while dealing with the idea of death and ephemerality lacks the usual feeling behind such poems. It is weirdly calming.

It opens up with a perfect line that deals with acceptance and a little grief. The uncertainty, marked by words like somewhere and handfuls, helps the person behind the words to cope with death. While there is some reluctance regarding the departure of the dead, the ultimate feeling is acceptance of a state that can't be controlled.

The next stanza clarifies the reasons behind such a cold-ish indifference towards death with a direct message to the reader. The person assures everyone, with confidence, that he/she will never dig any grave. The reason for this confidence is a mystery, one that is both intriguing and also offering a degree of comfort.

Great poem, good use of words, images and ideas. You link the lines in a smooth way, not leaving any detail out and using them to the full extent of their capacity. Good job!

This is a very touching and well-written poem. I can almost see myself burying something but I'm not sure what.

and every moment I've loved matter,

this is lovely <33

Hey there! Plume here, with a review!

This poem was so striking and gorgeous. As someone who has suffered a familial loss recently, I found that I could really relate to this poem. Your lovely imagery and the length of the poem really contributed to a sort of mourning feeling as well. It was a very somber affair and felt like an internal eulogy. It was really quite beautiful.

I think one thing I found exceptional was the perspective you took within the poem. I feel that during the grieving process, you mostly grieve the person who has passed, because, you know, it's what you're supposed to do. This poem, from the title to the actual content, seems to be taking the grieving a step further. The way I interpreted it was that along with the mourning for the person, the narrator is mourning their aftereffects. They're mourning for the way that mourning the person has changed them, from how feelings and happiness, in a way, go to die when someone else does. It very much had the energy of the quote "funerals aren't for the dead, they're for the living."

Also, the way you used the language definitely conveyed a sense of being stuck. I think the lines in the first stanza were accurately portrayed as a sort of longing on the part of the narrator who just perhaps wants to be over the grieving process, but can't because of some reason. Maybe it's a mental block of some sort? And the last line especially drove it home, with the "graves I will never dig" helping to convey that sort of wanting to move on and to bury feelings and memories but not being able to.

I also really enjoyed your title. It was what first caught my eye in the green room, and it has definitely lived up to my expectations. It ties in very well with the body of the poem itself, and both of them carry the same tone, which is almost bitter and melancholy while still having just a touch of being done with life. It's really incredible how you can convey so much in such a short work.

Overall: really lovely poem! It was a somber joy to read, and I really hope I can read more of your work in the future. Hopefully my review was worth it to read; I'm not the best at reading poetry and offering feedback. Until next time!!