Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm Knight Hardy here on a mission to ensure that all works on YWS has at least two reviews. You will probably never see this but....Imma do this anyway.
First Impression: Well this was a pretty random little thing here. It seemed like a pretty cute little love story but then that is literally all that was mentioned here. It didn't seem like it had an actual plot. And the emotions were maybe just lacking just a little. It didn't feel quite as realistic as I would have liked.
Anyway let's get right to it,
It was the middle of July after my sixteenth birthday and I had once again, won the Sasso Surfing Championship. Everyone from my high school, Sasso High, was there, even Alyssa. I had knew Alyssa since elementary school and every year, it seemed as if we got closer since we started going out in 6th grade.
Well that was a nice way to start out there. Its definitely a kind of nice and broad little depiction that you've got going on there about this character although I don't quite get what exactly you are trying to tell us by it.
Alyssa embraced me with a grand hug; I smiled. Every time she hugged me, I couldn't help myself from smiling, every time she kissed me, I couldn't help but laugh after, it was a normal involuntarily occurrence.
Well isn't that sweet?
We walked from Memorial Beach to the nearest Pizza King, bought one box of pizza, and went to my house. I opened the garage with the clicker, put my surf board in a corner, and unlocked the garage door. No one was home. I sat the box of pizza on the living room table, while Alyssa sat on the sofa and turned on the television.
Okay seemed like kind of a long transition there to just mention that they bought pizza and went home but it works out.
"This guy on the show called this girl a bitch, and all her friends beat him with their purses!" Alyssa replied.
Sounds very reasonable.
As I eyed the pizza box, I saw there were only three out of eight pizzas left. It wasn't strange for me, I had noticed that slim people ate a lot, Alyssa was one of them. As the three slices diminished, Alyssa and I caught hands.
I think earlier its not supposed to pizzas but rather pizza slices otherwise that's a cute little scene that you've got here.
"Alright, you can have it" Alyssa pushed out from her tired body.
"What can I say, I just never lose" I laughed.
Because they've never heard of a knife to cut it in two of course.
Well that was an interesting ending.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall it was still a pretty cute little love story but I was hoping for a bit more emotion behind these things that what is currently there. At the moment it just seems like there is something missing that is making this not seem like something that could happen in real life.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Harry
Points: 253363
Reviews: 4096
Donate