rose-tinted glasses

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah
i love this
i relate to this
you are one amazing pickle <3

Hello summer child, Eddard Stark here for a review before winter finally comes.

But first we have to get through the fall, which is one of the themes of this poem. This review will focus on the three aspects you wanted most focused on, but first I will discuss the visceral invocation that this poem gave me

Without going beneath the surface, this poem had some imagery that made me feel woeful for the countless lives wasted on the unforgiving pavement every day. Just to think that someone will die in a traffic accident by the end of the day is a pretty sad thing indeed. And the worst part is that it doesn't even have to be a person's fault for them to be in one.

But now let's do the title. Rose-tinted glasses sounds pretty good. Bono would be proud, or maybe even envious he didn't think of it himself. It can have a deeper meaning to it still. Like, rose because of the color of blood, tinted because it's so covered in blood that the glass is ubclean all over and because many drivers wear shades as a precaution, to see things better, reminding of the thing I said earlier that it can happen even if you're careful. And then glasses as in spectacles but also as in pieces of glass. So, unless you can find a title.with a bit.more meaning to it, I suggest you stick with this one.

As for the formatting, I can see it being aesthetically presented in three parts: the first two stanzas, the middle part,.and the last two stanzas. That being said, the second and third stanzas are connected by a conjunction, but I don't think that will be a problem at all. So my suggestion is to have a bit more space between the aforementioned parts for the purposes of improving the poem's countenance, or maybe even have them separated by an ellipsis, or the roman numerals which are popular again nowadays.

The way I see it, a stanza means a clause to you. A separation in meaning where instead of punctuation you use spaces. Punctuation reminds me of punctuality, so I'd add that the concern of being punctual is a major contributor to car accidents. People want to get places fast or on time, so they end up speeding their way into patient grave.

The formatting of the stanzas is okay. You separate lines based on how you want the poem read, maybe in the spirit of keeping the lines short. They don't look like anything in particular, except for maybe the edge of a windshield when there's some glass left over in randomly-distributed shards. But to complete this image you have to align all words to one side, including the ones in the middle.

Amd those words in the middle that are set in such a way serve the purpose of dramatic emphasis. So maybe you could keep them this way. The formatting of the word "illuminated", however, doesn't seem to serve any significant purpose at all. It's like you just wanted it to be on its own, but didn't want it to look small. I liked the poem in general, but this part made me wince. I'd suggest at least making it all caps and the same size, but bringing it down to the last line of the stanza sounds ideal.

That's it for the formatting and title. Now on to the content.

This poem seems like an attempt at a conceit (extended metaphor). The seasons are a common target for conceits. But the way you execute it is a bit unfavorable. Some of the parts in square brackets are obsolete. You could implement the theme of autumn by having lines the way they are, without explaining that it's about leaves, or without hinting at the season so much. It's like explaining a joke, like one of those people who are like "get it?" every time they tell one. Like I don't have to tell you that Bono wears tinted glasses. Not my fault if you don't get it.

And if you use such words that scream autumn, and the reader doesn't get it, then it's not your fault if they don't see the imagery. There are ways you could add to the meaning of the poem subtly and then have the readers that get it will feel satisfied, and have your poem be viewed as better. And I'm sure you will agree that poems should have some extra meaning to them. Otherwise they're just sentences separated by spaces.

Talking about car accidents and colors, you missed an opportunity to use the colors of traffic lights. There's green there, which indicates spring. Life. You're good to go. But we all know what red and yellow mean. So yeah. If you edit the poem, you should take this into consideration.

But yellow red and orange are the colors of fire as well.

The square brackets part again in "[laughter]". You don't need to explain it. They're driving around drunk, having an absolute blast with u2 playing on the radio. Or they're screaming in pain because even though they had a crash, the party they'd just left was an even bigger wreck. Unless you meant for the narrator to be a journalist reporting on the scene [which it clearly isn't], the square brackets here are unnecessary.

"Dead leaves or" Now here the brackets work. Fallen leaves crunch underfoot as well as plastic cups and fragments of glass. This part is really good. The "battlefield yet to be fought upon" part is ambiguous and open to interpretation and it could mean a few different things.

"Illuminated by red brake lights" might add to the imagery of cars trying to prevent a crash, or it could mean that some cars stop to see the wreck (maybe emergency vehicles).

"It takes two mirrors or a frew drinks to make me see an infinity of you". This is for me the best part of the poem. It has so much to it. When you put two mirrors on opposite sides of a person, they will infinitely be reflected and reduced to the subtle greenness of the mirror (note the color). The illusion of a person being there multiple times is also stereotypically obtained when a person is drunk. BUT also, an infinity of you might mean a hyperbolic sight of the person being "infinitely" spread across the pavement. Or if you want to get spiritual, an infinity of them in some afterlife. This part is amazing.

"For once those snapshots will make perfect sense." This part gives information about the players in the scene. The stanza it's part of is a bit meh (probably because the previous stanza was so good), but this line is really good, implying that the victims are in school, having taken photos every year. The shots of their disfigured bodies serve a purpose, but now their school photos will too. As memories of the kids, because they can't be seen the school-photo way again.

"Color of my soul". Color seems to be a recurring thing, so I'd strongly advise you to consider implementing the colors.of the traffic light, if not here, then someplace else. That would improve the poem exponentially.

Don't want to get into the whole tests thing because this review is long enough already, and it works this way. But I suggest rewriting the last line. Maybe paraphrasing it a bit to sound better. I suggest that the last foot be trocheic (stressed unstressed). The pyhrric (two unstressed syllables) you have here sounds a bit anticlimactic. Maybe "how you would have wanted" or switch up some words or something like that.

That's pretty much it. Winter is here. Walkers are everywhere. Hope my review is fire enough to keep them away. Have a nice day.

Oh my gosh, I really like this poem! What has drawn me in was the cool thing you did with "illuminated". I saw it right away, and I was like: "Oooooh!" and was curious about what the poem was about. Then, you had these cool things in the brackets, which you don't see that often, so it was even more cool and I certainly wasn't going to stop reading the poem now. Just sometimes I had to stop to make sense of what the brackets said in relation to the poem, because you can read the poem with or without the words in the brackets. It didn't bother me though, it was more like a mystery, so I was willing to take the time, and I quite enjoyed it (not like trying to figure out what a misspelled word is trying to represent). I like the flow of the poem as well, because there was no bump or anything I tripped over. I like how you make the poem interesting by all the "special effects" I've mentioned before, but also how you have a lot of imaginary in it and how two ideas flow besides each other and intertwine (like with the dead leaves and the red solo cups). My favourite part is probably...uh...everything? I wanted to say stanza 2 because of the clear image you paint in my mind, but then I quite like stanza 3 as well because it just looks gorgeous and because of all the "special effects", yet I also like stanza 4 because I love the use of the two mirrors and the few drinks (how both can make something look infinite, and how because you used the two mirrors I understand it much better, because I've never had alcohol before). I also like stanza 5, so...hard to choose

What I think you could add though, is an extra line at the end, saying: "taken them."
So it would be: "or perhaps yours is the soul in question/because i think i took the tests how you would have/taken them" At the end I was confused: "So...you would have...what?" Until I realized you referred to the way the other person took the tests, and that is exactly the way in which you took the tests. So yes, I did get what you meant after a moment or two, but maybe you could clarify that in the first place, so there isn't any confusion at all

Great poem, it has a lot of potential! Hm, I do think here of there you could do a bit more revising and make it even more awesome, although it's already super awesome as it is! But there's always room to grow and to improve, so I don't want to that say that your poem is perfect and deny it the chance to develop even more. It's pretty great, though, just saying
You did an awesome job, so bravo to that!

Bye