There's passionate love
Like a roaring fire
That screams at the world
"Try and tear us apart."
*
There's cold love
Frozen to ice
There used to be something between you
But not anymore.
*
There's love like a river
It seems calm on the surface
But it sweeps you away
For better or for worse.
*
There's love like a stagnant pool
A moment in time
Never getting better or worse
Static
*
There's love like a reflection
Self love, pride
It might not fulfil you
But will never leave you behind.
*
There's love like a shadow
Adore, protect
But remain unnoticed
They'll never realise you're there.
*
There's love like falling into bed
At the end of a long day
Maybe boring and predictable
But comforting in its own way.
*
There's love like that of a friend
Some people might say it isn't love
Why wouldn't it be?
You still care about someone.
*
There's love like a sunrise
The start of a chapter of your life
Beautiful and vibrant
But it ends so quickly.
*
There's love like infinity
It lasts forever
You don't realise it at first
But it's yours in the end.
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140,372 Literary Works • 673,125 Reviews
Hello there, Zontafer here to give a short review on your work (I'm not an expert on poems).
I believe this should be:
You used 'better or worse' in the paragraph (stanza in poemish?) above. I'd suggest you to write something here. Also, the pattern follows with a full-stop at the end of each paragraph/stanza, so you should probably have one after 'static'.
Not to be any rude or picky here, but that 'Static' ruined your flow. I don't really get the point of why it is there either.
Should be 'fulfill'.
I really liked how you told us about different types of love in the way you did. I'm not a poem expert as I told you earlier, but this seems pretty neat and simple -- in a good way to me. ^^
As written below me, it seems like you missed at least one love.
The end was something I loved, where you used the word 'infinity'. That was probably my favorite part of the poem. The way you ended it with 'But it's yours in the end.' was awesome as well. Seems like the end of a nice story or something, haha. :p
I hope this helped you a little bit, and remember; keep on writing!
- Zontafer
this is nice poem showing us the different types of love. just be careful with you sentence structure and word choice as sometimes it slows own the flow of this poem. in the word of Jack Kerouac “It ain’t whatcha write, it’s the way atcha write it.” If you have the best idea in the world but cannot communicate that well in writing then it is rubbish and no one will want to read it. I am not saying that yours is rubbish it is far from it but it just needs some touch ups and will be brilliant. Sometimes it is better to choose simple words rather than complex words to make you sound smart. If you can say something is a little about of words it is better than finding the biggest word which doesn't add anything to the poem or piece of writing.Hope this helps you in anyway. This is well written just fix up the things we have told you and it will be really good. Keep up the good work.
I love how you wrote this, but some of your word choices were poor.
For some reason, I wanted to read this, and see what rhymes you had, but there was none.
If you put some rhythm in there with it, then I'd definitely be better, (not saying it's bad.)
This is amazing, you're amazing, thank you so much for writing this, and have a superfantalistic day!
You forgot one- What happened to familial love? Do I have to date my mom to tell her she's more than a stranger to me?