Diana was quiet as Dana carried her to a room upstairs, James tailing them like a curious child. Dana managed to swing Diana onto a coffered bed, then quickly shut the door before James could sneak in.
"Don't go in there," Dana snapped. "Give the woman some privacy, you pervert. She has modesty around other mortals, so whenever I bring her home I don't wanna catch you tailing me. Otherwise, I'll kill you." He bared his fangs in anger.
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141,619 Literary Works • 675,173 Reviews
Agreeing with Gheala because she's
awesomeright, this is about the shortest chapter I think I've ever seen.A good benchmark to aim for would be about 2,500 words. Although this may seem like a lot, it can be quite easy to do!
I don't know whether this is an accidental post, but if it is indeed your whole chapter I would suggest filling it out using the following techniques:
1) Describe. Everything.
Literally, go into detail about the sky, weather, nature, people around the MC. It's so simple to do and adds a lot of body to the text.
2)Speech:
Get a conversation going back and forth between a few characters. This can be dragged on for so long (just make sure that it's still relevant and keeps the reader interested!)
3) Lists:
almost list out what your character did, but find ways to make it interesting rather than 'and then so-and-so did this and then that and then this other thing happened'. Keep it interesting!
I'm going to nitpick the short amount that is here, just so you have some idea of what it's like.
The highlighted bit seems quite abrupt. Try altering it to something more along the lines of 'If you don't obey me, you'll regret the day you were born'. etc.
I can't give an overall feel because it was so short, but good luck writing!
Is this a paragraph from chapter Two? Or it's the whole chapter?
It's very very very short. A chapter is normally 10 pages or more. Try to expand the details, describe the face expressions and emotions as well.
It has to be longer than this.