If we stood in another's shoes
And saw all their joys and sorrows,
Would we be able to remember
Or would we forget them on the morrow?
And if they stood inside our own
And knew our faults and shame,
Would they forgive us for it all
And hope we'd do the same?
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139,506 Literary Works • 672,595 Reviews
It is a sweet poem with lots of meaning. Nice.
Thank you.
Such a sweet, little, simple poem. I really liked this. And although it's simple, it has no vain words in it.
awesome poem, im surprised at this, great rhyme scheme, nice flow,
if you say,
"or would we forget them tommorow?" that might work better,
peace.
I loved this poem--short and sweet! I love rhyming poetry! To me, it doesn't flow right unless the poem either rhymes or twists and turns onward and that gives it a flow. Speaking of flow, I have a little nitpick...
I don't know why, but this section just didn't seem to flow the same as the first section. It 'falls' oddly after shame, but I think it might sound better if you added a list--for example, and they knew all our faults, our doubts, our shame,.
Other than that, this poem was perfect! Keep writing!
Oh! This is excellent! It flows together extremely well and the rhyming is superb. I'm impressed
. I do have one suggestion, just that "Or would we forget them on the morrow?" sounds a little bit funky - I think it might just be a bit wordy. I think it would be a little more effective if you changed it from on the morrow to tomorrow, but that is just a suggestion. Either way, I love the poem a lot, and you did an amazing job! Keep up the good work.