"Gracie's eyes are inlays of topaz, ma'am."
"Topaz is a color, right, Madeline?"
"Topaz is a type of jam."
"Really, dear? Well, I like strawberry jam.
I eat it on bread every day, at nine."
"Gracie's eyes are inlays of topaz, ma'am -
Topaz. A nice, brownish-yellow jam.
Like sapphire, amethyst, I define-
Topaz is a type of jam."
"Brownish yellow... gravy on yams and ham!
But no good color for eyes, Madeline."
"Gracie's eyes are inlays of topaz, ma'am -
Glistening, precious, not resembling ham."
"Oh, gem? Like the rock on a ring of mine?"
"Gracie's eyes are inlays of topaz, ma'am.
Topaz is a type of jam."
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140,714 Literary Works • 673,675 Reviews
*Gasps* *Gasps* *Sighs*
This is a complete package of raw beauty,mate!! I mean,there's this beautiful layering of innocence ,garnished with sophistication.The choice of words is simply fabulous.
AND THAT LINE-"Gracie's eyes are inlays of topaz, ma'am." -The way ,you would used it ,like a refrain,it sort of left me feeling impressed.
Awesome one.
This poem is more of a glowing ruby.
But Ruby is a type of Jam .
Keep writing,dear!!
This reminded me so much of "Who's On First?" If you haven't read it yet, I highly encourage you to. It's one of the best dialogues I've ever seen
This was light and humorous and altogether enjoyable. I think it's spelled "gem" though, with a G rather than a J.
Happy writing!
Dark Heart
*claps**claps**claps*
So, I love this villanelle, because they are so difficult to write since I can never come up with one that actually makes sense. I've got to pay my respect to you. I have to admit, I'm a bit confused by the topic. The MC seems to be discussing about Topaz is a type of jam and jam in general. I get the feeling, that our MC -Madeline seems to be talking with an old woman who doesn't quite understand what is going on. No matter what, I really like the humour in this.
The whole poem, has a subtle underlay of humour in it. Maybe you weren't aware of this but it does. And somehow the rhythm works out beautifully.
This is a really unique and awesome poem, I have no nitpicks for it. Keep up the great work!
-Laure
I can't comment because I don't understand, then again, understanding is a state of mind that I choose not to be in.
Hola!
Because I am such a dunce in the mornings, forgive me when I say that I finally figured out that the jam was supposed to be gem, as in gemstone...
Well, maybe that was not intended, but that's what I figured.
This made me smile, especially because I feel so depressed when I read or edit one of my poems. They're altogether DEPRESSING. :/
I hope you win!! I've never heard of that contest but I love love love love absolutely love it!!
Can this poem be my Valentine?
~Wonder
Hey, Pink! Also remember to submit this as a reply to Event 7. Can't let this not count
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