How do I explain it?

Hello, darling! Pardon if I repeat what your other reviewers have said.

First of all, I feel like the imagery of this poem is interesting, where it comes up in the description, but you could have used a lot more of it. Some places, you default to telling when showing would have a much bigger impact on the reader, and you obviously have the images - I especially enjoy your line that begins "like an impetuous wave"; I think that if you carried the images throughout the whole piece, there would be more solidarity and you would garner more of an emotional response from your audience.

Secondly, I think I have a bit of an issue with the punctuation you use at the end of the lines. The beginning three sound more like questions, but you've given them exclamation points, and it's a little confusing. Especially because you use exclamation points a lot, the impact is undermined when you use them near the end, and I think that changing your early ones to other punctuation marks might increase, again, the emotional response from the audience nearing the end. I also have an issue with the spots you've used semicolons - see: [url=theoatmeal.com/comics/semicolon]how to use a semicolon[/url] - because some of your phrases on either side are dependent clauses, so you would use a comma instead to link the two.

I find your flow a little strange as well, going from line to line, and I don't like the ellipsis at the end - what purpose does it serve? If you want a pause, you could easily just break the line and end the poem with "without your love" as a final, three-word line, which would probably be more effective anyway.

Overall, I don't think it's bad, but it definitely could have been a lot stronger. Keep writing!

This isn't a review, but I really love it! Well done!

I thought this poem sounded like it was Shakespeare!! But I don't think that really worked to your advantage.. It seemed like the form of it was too old-fashioned and mature for what I feel people should be writing nowadays. The way you choose to write is up to you, I'm just sharing my opinion.. I also found it to be a bit confusing like miley said. It seemed like the overall idea of the poem changed frequently, throwing the reader off. I think that this poem has a lot of potential, it just needs a bit of revising. Don't stop writing!!

hi!
nice work pal!

there are few things that i would like bring under your notice -

the poem is nice, no doubts about it. but it could have been more effective if you would have stayed on a single track! you begin the poem with line - "How to explain it to my heart!" but then you go narrating the things as if you want the guy to understand as the next line changes to - "How to make him understand!".
from there the things got a bit confusing. when i read the first line i thought the poem would be about things after break-up like telling your heart its over. but from the second line the things change you go telling that you want him to understand that you still love him and want him back.
but suddenly there comes a line - "How without hurt, will I make him aware?" this again changes the idea of poem. it now gives a feel that you want to tell him that its over and you that care about him anymore.

rest fine.
so,
keep dreaming! keep writing!

A very nice poem! I really love the repetition in the beginning, and this poem flows nicely.

I few things I would suggest:

Maybe get rid of a few of those exclamation, though yes, this is a declaration of love, I feel like there is also a hint of seriousness in it. For example, the last line. I think it would be read much better without the exclamation point.

Overall, a very nice poem, keep up the good work!

Hope this has helped.

Okay the second to last line should say "not" you have no. I found this rather random but then I feel like that makes sense because of the title of the story, including your description. I feel like this could use some comas or periods along the way to add more emphasis on certain parts so that it doesn't just run on. This was really good other than those tiny little mishaps, the second two don't even really matter, you're the author you do what you want. It was good, I hope this helped you some.