Good Morning/Afternoon/Evening/Night(whichever one it is in your part of the world),
Hi! I'm here to leave a quick review!!
First Impression: Well this was quite the piece here. I wasn't expecting it to be quite so powerful given the title but somehow it went from being a simple sounding almost abstract experimental scenario to just all falling into a place in a powerful little display there and I loved it.
Anyway let's get right to it,
White spaces. They’re everywhere. In Movies, Literature, art, and even the world around us. They’re used to enhance the things around them by appearing insignificant, by being a constant white noise to keep the main focus in the spotlight. Last night I had a dream unlike any I’d had before. It was like watching a movie or reading a non-fiction or watching an artist paint a scene from the darkest depths of their subconscious. Except it wasn’t dark at all, everything was white.
Mostly.
I had no control, I was simply watching a particular space from an unseen body. The space around didn’t move like the one I was watching, and it was extremely white as well. The Particular Space was more of a dusty black and appeared to move. Meanwhile, the surrounding space didn’t, it was just The Background.
Ooooh. Well this is something a little different. Loving the vibes though. Its not the most action packed or emotionally charged opening but its just on that plane of very interesting weirdness such that we get hooked in quite quickly to this one anyway.
As the unseen eyes in my dream stared at The Particular Space, it began sprouting curly strands from the top of it. Just by looking at them, I could tell that if they had a color it would be a dark brunette.
A door appeared in The Background. It was white too, but not as white as the space it was embedded in. The Particular Space glided through the door and on the other side, there were two gray spaces huddled around a small but bold black space. The Particular Space fluttered and quickly glided beside the other significant spaces, together they jiggled.
A breeze swept through the room and blew away the other significant spaces leaving just The Particular Space. Another door appeared across from it. Again, The Particular Space glided through.
Ooooh well this is quite the little dance here. I think you've done a wonderful job keeping this visuals clear an identifiable so even though we're dealing with some rather large abstract visuals here I have no trouble imagining exactly what's going on in this piece so quite well done there.
The small and bold black space from before was slightly bigger now and was laid flat on what appeared to be a slightly more solid piece of The Background. To its right were The Two gray spaces from before, and to its left was a gray space slightly darker than The Two. The Particular Space joined The Two. All three of them shuddered when the slightly-darker-than-The-Two space shook a little before them.
Another breeze blew everything away but The Particular Space. A door revealed itself. The Particular Space glided through, slightly paler than the dusty black it was before. Through the door, The Two were slightly paler too, but The Bold Space was slightly bolder and also bigger. It wobbled over to The Two, they all jiggled. The Particular Space stood blankly for a moment but then shook and joined the rest in the jiggling.
.
Well it looks like we're really gong back and forth on this one. I don't know why but it appears to be quite stressful and quite relaxing at the same time and I really don't quite know what to make of this situation to be completely honest here.
A breeze came. A door came. The Particular Space glided through.
The Bold Space was half the height of The Particular Space now, though it now sat on another solid piece of The Background. It was bolder too. Beside it, there were small black cylindrical spaces, it shivered at the sight. The Two were there, slightly paler, and they were quivering. The Particular Space stood blankly again, It was paler, bordering on gray. I felt really sorry for it in my dream, it seemed sad, but all I could do was watch.
The Particular Space went to The Two and The Bold Space and jiggled. Only The Bold Space jiggled back. The Two stilled and The Particular Space backed away, and then they jiggled with just The Bold Space.
Okayy we've got a new character in here, and now I am slowly starting to lose the image though. Its taking me a bit of extra reading to try and keep up with exactly where this is trying to go. Its still not a bad thing because it is understandable as long as you pay enough attention.
A Breeze. A Door. The glide Through.
The Bold Space was on a raised piece of background in front of many white and insignificant spaces. The Two were in front of those spaces, The Particular Space was beside them, rippling, and was the same shade of gray as the Two. The Bold Space was somehow even bolder, and almost as big as The Particular Space. Though, there was an odd-shaped pale gray thing attached to The Bold Space. I was angry at this point in the dream though at the moment I couldn’t fathom why.
Breeze. Door. Through.
The Bold Space was leaving The Two behind. The Particular Space was paler.
Oooh I am loving the way you've got these little soundbites almost to sandwich us there because I think it does a lovely job in terms of actually grounding us a bit. I don't quite know if its intentional but having that repeating pattern is creating that effect for me.
Whoosh. Click. Glide.
The bold space was lifting a thin rectangular, bold object in front of The Two. The particular Space bordering on white.
Whoosh. Click. Glide.
The bold space with two small bold spaces nuzzled against it. The Particular Space was a pearl white.
Fffwoosh. Tchick. Glmm.
The Background. It was empty. Nothing but The Background. At least that’s what I thought at first, but The Particular Space was there, as pale as ever. Nearly as white as the ground it resided on. It was rippling and shuddering. The background seemed bigger and drafty as well, as if there was a constant breeze blowing away any other significant spaces that may want to be near The Particular Space. I heard sobs, then realized they were my own after I woke up.
Ooh well that was quite the moment. It seems after that little medley of thing we've got our character actually waking up here and from the looks of things it does not look like that dream has been interpreted in any way that can reasonably be considered peaceful or happy.
Tears streamed down my face as I was laid on my back staring at the ceiling. My sobs only added to the constant noise of my apartment. The arguing and music. The leaky pipes and barking dogs. But it was all just white space. A ceaseless song to define the bold spaces in the world that really mattered. Every bold space needs a white space, right?
I shuddered a sigh and knew then my hair would be frizzy today as a few of my tears trickled above the curve of my ear into my brunette curls.
It was a unique dream. It was an awful dream.
Ooooh that's a lovely little note to end on. I think it ends up giving us quite a bit more power than you'd think there. Very powerfully done. I wasn't expecting all of that abstractness to fall into place so simply and to craft up such a powerful little note but here we are and I think you've done great.
Aaaaand that's it for this one.
Overall: Overall I'd just say very well done here with where you managed to take this piece. At the start it really didn't seem like it was going to end up quite that far but I think you managed this really well. Powerful little piece this one, it certainly makes you want to read it a few times and leaves you with quite a bit to think about.
As always remember to take what you think was helpful and forget the rest.
Stay Safe
Kate
Points: 257473
Reviews: 4116
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