I was just a maddening mess and you were the epitome of perfection
And I fell for you…
I was chattering all day long while you were as calm as the sea, placid and tranquil
And I fell for you…
I saw you turn your back against me but I stayed there
And I fell for you…
I saw you breakdown in pain, when everything seemed upside down and you tried to catch a breath
And I fell for you…
I saw you have hope in me while I was just a broken soul, at the brink of the end
And I fell for you…
I saw you in your unkempt hair and snuggly eyes, trying hard to stay open wide
And I fell for you…
I remember how our hands brushed for the first time and how your smell hit my mind
And I fell for you…
I saw you work so hard and come so far, living your dreams
And I fell for you…
I saw you fall asleep in peace and serenity, clutching the edge of my dress
And I fell for you…
I saw you assuring me of love and care, while I waited for the end to near
And I fell for you…
I saw the vulnerable you waiting for acceptance as everyone jilted away
And I fell for you…
I heard you sing while the notes etched on my heart and mind bringing a tune to my life
And I fell for you…
I saw you scramble the last bite of the pizza and that one scoop of the ice-cream
And I fell for you…
I saw you take my stand in all I did, supporting me amidst the crowd and correcting in person
And I fell for you…
I saw you wander alone in solitude and wished so bad to be with you
And I fell for you…
I saw you looking for love, while love itself knocked your doors
And I fell for you…
I saw you in your best and your worst
And I still fell for you…
I tried so hard and got no far thinking how to unlove you
But all I did was fell for you…
*****
So what if you found love elsewhere ?
So what if this wasn't the love to be eternal ?
So what if I kept 'unconfessed' just to have your presence ?
So what if you were happy with someone else with pretty eyes and long hair ?
So what if I wasn't the one for you to offer a lifetime ?
So what if you never held my hand again ?
So what if WE weren't meant to be ?
So what if you were inexplicable to my words ?
So what if this gave me all the uncountable pains ?
So what if I was shattered again ?
All I did was fell for you...
Because everything you are, is everything i need
And You're everything to me...
And I again fell for you…
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140,071 Literary Works • 672,990 Reviews
Hey Megha!
A lovely piece that comes straight from your heart. There's an intense love and pain coming from the poet. The refrain "I fell for you" emphasizes more on your idea and gives a more profound effect.
With the first line itself you caught my full interest and attention. It is something very relatable to most of us who think we are not perfect for someone. In the first part you have given a very vivid description of all those small incidents and feelings that made you "fell in love for him" <3
The second part was amazing too. You have changed the mood of the poem and now it's like you are confronting your feelings.It happens to most of us when we are too carried away in someone's love and then are lost and left all alone.
Such a beautiful line <3
I enjoyed reading your work and felt your passionate love. Keep writing with your heart!
Thank you @Hkumar for all your appreciation.
I believe you actually know nothing when you fall in love with a person. That feeling is surreal and beyond all worldly desires. Suddenly everything seems so right and a dream come true. And most importantly the little things in life are that mater the most. We get engrossed in those minute details and experiences and finally, unlucky people like us get hit hard by the reality of life where we do not consider ourselves to be perfect enough for that one person we think is one and all. But I still believe there's no harm in loving. Amidst all the pains you find at least one reason to smile and that's enough.
Will definitely write more and come up with better works. Till then happy reading. And yes 'I again fell for him' .
Ugh gotta hate/love unrequited love.
This poem hit so hard and its so relatable to a lot of young people. When you fall in love for the first time it's usually unrequited and ends in heart break, but it's also a very important experience to have. I feel like you really portray this really well.
The the first half of the poem is my favorite. It shows the desperate side of falling for someone. The need to have that person look at you like you matter, to pay attention to you for just a moment. And you don't care how hurt you get in the process because you're in love.
The second half shows the careless side of love. The willingness you have to get hurt because you believe that it could be something magical.
The only thing I didn't really like about this poem was the 'and i fell for you." I just think you should have used it less often as it interrupts the flow and rhythm of the poem. Maybe use it every four or five lines?
Anyways keep writing! Maybe i'll see your works around more often
-Jess
Hey, thanks @itsmejr for the feedback.
Well love makes us do crazy things and probably the willingness to get hurt is one of them. Love is desperate and surreal always making us want more of it. The first half of the poem is also my favourite as I have experienced and felt all of it vey closely but we also need the reality to hit us and hence, the second half which I believe you like as well.
As far as the repetitive 'and I fell for you' is considered, it was put in such a way to make the feeling and realisation more evident. But I will surely keep your tip in mind as I write my next work.
Thanks once again. Till then happy reading.
-Megha
The emotion is so raw in this piece. I love how after every line you come back to "and I fell for you," really showing how consumer this narrator is with the person they fell for. I feel that it really encapsulates what unrequited love is, especially when it is so close (i. e. the people are good friends). One thing I also like is how you describe both the mundane and the ethereal in terms of love. It shows both ends of the spectrum nicely. A couple things grammar-wise: in line 7, breakdown should be two words. Towards the end, you forgot to capitalize "I". Also: I feel you could make even more impact if there was some sort of evident rhythm. Something about having the really long line and then the "and I fell for you" bit was a little awkward. But apart from that, I thought this poem was phenomenal. I could relate to this a lot, as I have been in a situation like this before, and it really hurts. Thanks for creating this lovely piece.
Thank you @silverquill12 for all the comments. Will definitely keep them in mind. This piece was something very close to me and also a true confession of mine which I was longing to make. All that has been penned down is on my absolute real feelings.