Published November 22, 2007
A place they give you love
from their hearts in which they gave,
To show you that they cared
they gave you hugs which they shared,
Every day they smiled
to show you you're worth their whiled,
For this place is unlocated
unable to be pointed,
A place of the heart
impossible to be torn apart,
The place of the ones who care
whether you're here or there,
A place that is unphysical
not being unreasonable,
A truth of the soul
to which we must all go.
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141,479 Literary Works • 674,504 Reviews
.............oh ok........thanks
Hello again!
For example, if I had an essay about my family life, it would BORING if I didn't tell a story or five about how weird my family is and so on. I mean, I could tell you that my family was weird, or I could tell you stories about how my dad made me make up a haiku about baked beans flying on the wall, on the spot in front of several strangers, no less! Which one would you rather hear about? 
I think this poem would be much better than it is currently if you added some examples in it.
So the key here is SHOW, don't TELL. I can say a lot, but if I can't give examples or bring something personal in it, then it's boring.
Here you have a fairly solid poem where you tell us about how nice home is. But, to make it really interesting, you got to bring in something personal in it. And no, you don't have to make it angsty or anything if you don't want to (haha, I seriously doubt that I could make the baked beans poem story angsty) but you have to tie yourself in the poem somehow. Because everybody is different. Poetry is just another way to celebrate these differences.