It was unnerving to feel her grandmother's eyeballs on her while she ate.
Danara nervously swallowed a mouthful of broccoli, keeping her eyes on her plate. Her grandmother--Aggie, she reminded herself--was inspecting her like an interesting exhibit at the zoo. Needless to say, Danara didn't appreciate it.
While this uncomfortable examining was going on, her mother chattered away about various little topics--how her friend was doing, how Agatha was getting on with arthritis. She mostly received grunts as replies, but it didn't deter her. Now the discursive conversation was on her job, which Danara detested.
"I once had a client who was completely ungrateful," Danara's mother said, as if it was the greatest crime a person could commit. "He was rude, savage, and totally unworthy of my helpful services. But what could I do? So--"
"Abby, quit talking for a second so that I can speak with Danara," ordered Aggie. "How are you feeling, Danara?"
Anxious, Danara wanted to spit out. Wary, cautious, and a bit queasy. "I'm doing fine, Agatha," she replied, working her mouth around her grandmother's name.
"Good." Aggie looked her over again, this time with softer eyes. "Why don't you eat more of your food? You look like a bird, pecking at it."
"Uh, I'm not hungry," Danara stammered. "Please, may I be excused?"
"Oh, please, none of that manners pish-posh," Agatha snorted. "You may, if you aren't that hungry. I do hope your appetite grows, though. You barely ate more than my dog."
"You have a dog?" Her excitement grew. If she had a companion that wasn't an old lady, maybe her stay at Agatha's house wouldn't be as dreary as she thought.
"Ah, he died years ago. A picky eater, he was. You're just like him."
Danara's face fell, although she tried to hide it. It looked like her stay was going to be as bad as she had expected. With a small sigh, Danara pushed back her chair and stood shakily. "Where am I going to be staying?" she asked.
Aggie tried to stand up and grumbled under her breath, falling back into the chair. "Abby, you'll have to take this one for me. You know how my bones are."
"Of course, mother." She got up from her chair and smiled brightly at Danara--a smile that didn't fool her for a second. It looked like all that talk and prattle was just a disguise. When she followed her mother up the stairs of the house, Danara saw her hand twitch tensely.
They softly walked through a carpeted hall. The walls were decorated with so many pictures Danara couldn't take it all in. There were baby photos of her mother and aunts and uncles, pictures of family get-togethers that Danara couldn't even remember, and random moments that Danara didn't see the importance of. With so many memories on the walls, she was surprised that it hadn't fallen already.
Then she and her mother paused in front of a small white door. "This is going to be your room," her mother said cheerfully. She opened the door and Danara stepped into her bedroom for the next two months.
Her first impressions: formal, beautiful, and extremely unnerving. Everything looked barely lived-in. The bed was perfectly made without a wrinkle in the covers. The curtains dangled in front of the window from a long curtain rod, white and prim. Another snowy white door adorned the wall opposite the bed, presumably leading to the closet. This doesn't feel much like home, Danara thought sadly.
"Doesn't it look nice?" Her mother entered Danara's temporary bedroom as well, looking cursorily at the surroundings. "I'm sure you'll be comfortable. You can get your luggage from downstairs, honey, and then you can unpack here."
Danara felt like spiders were crawling over her skin. Things didn't seem right, somehow. But she turned and quietly went downstairs, trying to plaster on a smile for her grandmother.
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Canary word: Present
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125,004 Literary Works • 672,792 Reviews
"It looked like her stay was going to be as worse as she had expected." This seek a bit inconsistent. Maybe you should instead say 'It looked like her stay was going to be worse than she had expected.' or 'It looked like her stay was going to be as bad as she had expected." like BiscuitsLeGuin suggested. Either one would work.
Not much else to say. Clearly, the story is still building up, so plotwise, I don't have any comments.
Hello hello!
I'm here to take this out of the green room for you. I apologize for not reading the previous chapters first, but I'll be looking at this as a part of a greater whole.
I'll leave things there for now, but please let me know if you have any questions or if you would like feedback about something I didn't already mention! Keep working on this story and have a great day! 
I picked this out of the green room because you described the genres as realistic and dramatic and I love stories that are realistic and dramatic. I thought you did a nice job with the overall atmosphere of the scene. I know nothing about Danara and the situation here, but I could feel her discomfort and her unease with the situation. (Danara is a beautiful name by the way).
In all honesty, I think you're doing a lot of things really well. I liked the description you added in throughout the dialogue and narration and that even though this is in third we still got a sense of how Danara is feeling and what's going through her mind. I barely even noticed it was in third because you wove that in so nicely.
My biggest qualm with the chapter is that not much happens. Obviously I can't comment on the overarching plot arc too much since I'm coming in late, but it doesn't feel like the plot is moving forward in any significant way. If I were going to sum the chapter up in one sentence it might be something like: Danara feels uncomfortable in her new home and is shown her room. That's fine, but where's the oomph? Where's my pull to keep reading because I absolutely have to know what's going to happen next? You have some nice little foreshadowing at the end (at least it feels like foreshadowing) when Danara feels that "Things didn't seem right, somehow." (because when things don't feel right they usually aren't).
It's good writing but I think more needs to happen. Slower chapters or scenes are fine, especially if they're following a more intense scene, but the plot still needs to move forward. A good way to tell, is to take the scene out. If the story will still make sense (maybe with a few small changes) and the plot arc will still work without the scene, then it's a sign that you probably don't need it. Maybe you could combine this scene with what precedes it or follows it.
Since you're already doing so many things well, one little thing you can do to take your writing to the next level is work on strengthening your verbs. It's pretty crazy how much this can improve and change your writing and I'm going to town with this on my current WIP. Megrim wrote an amazing article on this over at the knowledge base, and I'd encourage you to check it out!
Overall, a nice chapter with nice writing, but could use a touch more oomph.
Hey again, here for a non-review day review, which will hopefully be less rushed and therefore fewer spelling errors!
Nit-picks:
This sentence doesn't quite sit right with me. It is a thing that is true, but it sounds kind of detached, or maybe the language sounds a bit stilted. I think it would be more realistic if she called him a name because that would show her emotion ie anger/resentment. It also sounds like she only ever had one of these. I think to remedy these two issues I'd say something like: "I had this client once who was just a total selfish pig".
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Character: Danara's character is consistent, as is her mother. Her grandmother is interesting and I look forward to learning more about her.
Setting: At first I was going to pick up on this sentence: "Her first impressions: formal, beautiful, and extremely unnerving." This didn't fit at all with the impression I have of Agatha so far. I then read the final paragraph and it made sense. The issue is that I shouldn't have that confusion at first and then have to apply the later paragraph to what I read earlier. It takes me out of the flow and disrupts my reading experience. The final paragraph itself is good so just move that up to the first description of the room and end on something like Danara shuddering.
Plot: Once what I've just pointed out is sorted, this chapter will have introduced an interesting plot point and I am intrigued to read on. Please tag me when you publish your next chapter
Flow: I don't think I've ever corrected consistently so little grammar. Your flow and pace are excellent. Also I really like your chapter length.
Hope this helps,
Biscuits