[deleted]

by Lilprincess

  • Poetry
  • Other

Published May 27, 2011

In Poems

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Comments & reviews · 4
User avatar
Snoink
Comment
Snoink commented Comment · May 31, 2011

Locked. Plagiarism.

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kellydddys Comment
kellydddys commented Comment · May 28, 2011

I really like this I could tell it came from the heart. But I would make sure I is capital. But over all I love the poem. :)

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halogirl4197
Review
halogirl4197 wrote a review Review · May 27, 2011

This is great! :) But I'd suggest lining the sentences out, ya know, to make it more flowy :D. Lol, it would be neat and gorgeous! You're very good :)

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Sassykat
Review
Sassykat wrote a review Review · May 27, 2011

How sweet. Now, critiques!

I would tell you today, here I added a backspace before the comma and a return
That you're the one that fills my life,same here
Whose smiles I cannot wait to see, ditto, as well as for all the other lines.
Whose arms I long to have wrapped around me,
Whose lips I live to kiss, softly,
Passionately , in every way,
I would want you to know that you make my heart skip a beat,
You fill my soul with content,
You brighten my dark skies,
You fill my days and nights
With stars, hopes, and cascading dreams.



Awww, this was so nice. It was almost musical. Just take care to use proper puctuation and grammar, and you're good to go. :-D Fantastic job.



Darkness cannot drive out darkness: only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate: only love can do that.
— Martin Luther King Jr.