The path I now walk is one of a lonesome nature;
No stars, no light, no warmth, no direction
I wander aimlessly through the dark abyss staring into oblivion
Hoping to find that which all people seek;
A light
I had found such a light once
Just as lost as I am now I stumbled upon warmth and direction;
This direction came to me, shone through the darkness,
And burned brighter than no other
But the light merely shone in the distance
As I got closer it burned brighter and more intensely
And my thoughts solely pertained to its attainment;
With each step, each breath, the light drew closer and closer
Drawing me nearer with its gaze,
Brightening my eyes and filling my heart with foreign emotion
But just as fast as I had approached the light,
Just as fast as it had warmed me,
It was gone.
I witnessed infinity in mere hours, pure beauty pass by
A lifetime of happiness in a moment
Now my search continues for light,
Trekking the oblivion arms outstretched,
Hoping and waiting to catch a glimpse of light
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I really do like the poem seems like something I would have written to someone I loved. Lol, if I was in a relationship that is. Life without love of any kind is one of either pain or just loneliness. Kind of reminds me of a short story or poem if that’s what you want to call it, I wrote back in 2009. It was a free write about the darkness I had been through. However, during that darkness like your poem there were some flashes of light.
Hey Kenneth! Just little old me here again to do a review!
"The path I now walk is one of a lonesome nature;" I would change this sentence a bit, since it was a bit hard to read. "The path I now walk on is one of a lonesome nature" I feel as though the word "on" in the sentence helps the flow a little. Might just be a personal opinion.
"I wander aimlessly through the dark abyss staring into oblivion" LOVE this sentence. I can really see it in my head, and everyone loves the imagery poems can create!
"shone through the darkness,"
"But the light merely shone in the distance" Do you mean shown or shone. Both can work, but I have a feeling you meant shown. Correct me if I'm wrong.
"Now my search continues for light,
Trekking the oblivion arms outstretched,
Hoping and waiting to catch a glimpse of light" Perfect way to end it!
Overall the punctuations you use and where you use them still bother me a little bit. Please just be constant in punctuations; if a sentence continues on to another line put a comma. If it is the end of a sentence or paragraph, put a period!
I loved this poem as much as the first one, you really have a gift for opening peoples hearts and souls with what you write! Keep up the great work!