Home Bound
By Kara Saari
6/6/15
Writer’s Bio: Kara Saari is a 14 year old girl who is very emotional. Her family moves around a lot. She loves to dance and write poems. She is very creative and energetic. She has written many poems and some short stories, but has never shared them with people outside of her family.
Home Bound
My mom was about to have me. I came out on the date 9/23/2000. I didn’t know what I was getting into. The Military. If you don’t know what happens when you are in the Military then you will find out, I first moved when I was 11 months old. Then after that every two to three years we would move. It was stressful. My mom thinks I’m bubbly, she hasn’t seen me be the new kid. I would sit in class, no talking, no nothing. We moved to Virginia when I was about 4. 2 years later we moved to another place in Virginia about 3 hours away. I was now 6. We lived right down the street from my school. I didn’t know anybody. I only remember one thing, the first time I was ever bullied. From that point on I was homeschooled. We moved again, but this move was different. It was all the way across the country. From Virginia to California was a long travel. I was still homeschooled until I desired not to.
I finally decided to stop being home schooled. First day at 4th grade, I cried. Not just one day, no, every single day. Why? My dad was just deployed. My grandma and dog just died. I didn’t want another person to die too. I was depressed. I never showed that I was unhappy, I felt like I had to be the strong one. My mom didn’t know. I found out that I had separation anxiety. I went to a counselor. She was nice; she helped a little, but never fully. I made 2 friends. Best friends for life, right? They were enemies of each other. I was not allowed to sit by either one, instructions from the other. I just gave up. No more. 5th grade one of my best friends moved. Finally, I got another best friend. She was rude. 6th, 7th, 8th grade, I was homeschooled. I met new friends. I got to see them on Tuesdays and sometimes Thursdays. I was happy. I lived there for 5 years and loved it. We moved, again. 6 hours away from my home. It will always be my home. We will move next year if my dad retires, if he doesn’t retire we get to stay to the end of next year.
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Canary word: Present
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125,011 Literary Works • 672,841 Reviews
Hello!
Great job with that! Other than what gorgeous said, I only have one more thing...
Fabulous job, and keep writing!! 
This is really great. I agree with Gorgeous, It's a good idea to share a part o your life in a story.
I noticed how you said 'I moved' a lot. Which is actually good considering your story, but I would like a little more with it...other than just 'I/we moved again'.
Other than that, this is great!
~Snazzy, Pencil, Penicillin, etc.
Stay awesome
Okay, I adored the way you placed yourself within the story. Sharing a part of your life with everyone else around here. Though there is some minor adjustments you should make.
1. Be descriptive- what were some of the stuff you saw in all the places you moved to. What were the people like and what were their cultures and traditions.
2. Expressing- What were other emotions you were feeling with each move: like did you fee happy, sad, abnormal, weird. Express more feelings since I know that they had to be more.
3. Add some historic background- was there any other reasons as to why you move besides the ones you mentioned, why did your family pick these places to move to.
Overall, I believe you did great. I enjoyed reading this piece since it was very motivating and inspiring. Continue writing, I would love to see more from you.