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Young Writers Society


16+ Language

In the Hands of Six - Prologue

by Omni


Warning: This work has been rated 16+ for language.

A/N: Although this is a fanfiction of the Marvel Cinematic Universe, I have added both comic book characters and my own characters.  I do not read the comics and this will be made from my own knowledge of the already created characters and branching onto my own ideas.  I do not mean offense to any fans of the comics.

The room shuddered with a small sigh. Soft dust cascaded from the ceiling onto the dimly lit room below. In the middle of the room, the dust revealed a dark silhouette kneeling before a dull statue. Clouded by the darkness, three skeletal fingers appeared from the dark folds of its cloak. A thick crack permeated the air and the candles roared to life. The figure rose, letting the cloak fall from their figure. The pale light shone on a thin figure with distinctly pale skin and silky tan hair that fell to their mid back. Not quite man, not quite woman, this figure felt more than either.

The cavern rumbled again, sending dust pouring again. They lifted their head to the ceiling. “He’s here,” They sighed with sorrow.

The sturdy stone walls caught Their soft words with relish, all at once collapsing to reveal a barrier beyond. The aurora of colors flowed around the patch of ground They stood on, eating away the edges ravenously.

The shaking started again, reverberating amongst the aurora. With a little flick of a finger, They slowed the aurora, focusing the colors into images, pictures. Skimming through multiple different images, They stopped at one. This one flickered with uneasiness. Pulling the image closer, They breathed in the environment. It unveiled a labyrinth of earthen corridors and roughly-shaped coliseums. It was a familiar place. With one long inhale, the earth They stood on crumbled before Them and They fell. The image enveloped them, flowing through and around Them. Suddenly, They were there.

Torches resting on along the walls flared to life as They appeared, touched by Their familiar magic. The bricked walls were moist, the ground muddy from the humid environment. They brushed their fingers lightly along the wall, pulling back sanguine grime. “It’s been too long since I was last here,” They muttered softly.

Rubbing the grime off, They rushed down the hall. Torches lit as They hurried past, only to fall dim after Their magical presence abandoned them. The ground beneath Their feet sloshed heavily with every step. The narrow tunnels slipped down deeper into the depths and widened out. Hushed whispers met Their ears as They entered one of the coliseums scattered throughout the area. All of the masked, hooded people rose slowly as They slowed Their pace, murmuring amongst themselves. Someone pushed through the slowly forming crowd, lowering his hood. He sprouted a worried smile, accenting his stress lines. Bowing slightly, he nodded to the group and they dissipated to their normal duties.

“Timeless One, we are graced with your presence.” The Timeless One nodded Their acknowledgement. He cleared his throat. “Perhaps we should talk someplace more private. If you would, my tent is not far.” They nodded, and he led the way.

Once in the tent, the man sat down wearily. “Timeless One, you being here is no good sign.”

“It never is, Strange.” They smiled softly. “It seems it has been too long since I last visited your camp. However, the news I come with this time is dire, but is it what we expected. It is not safe here anymore.”

His brows furrowed. “Where shall we move to next?”

They shook Their head. “No, Strange, there’s no running from this threat in the tunnels. Thanos has come for the Dimensions. We knew this day would happen.” They pulled out a large change with a heavy bronze medallion attached to it. In the medallion rested a dull green stone with a cool tint to it. They laid it gingerly in his hands, folding them over it.

He stared at his enclosed hands for a moment. “What happens to you in this game for two?”

“This has grown larger than all of us. Thanos cannot get his hands on a single Infinity Stone. To my last breath, I will make sure that is the truth.”

He nodded. “I’ll evacuate my people. There may still be need for us in the future. This Dimension will close behind me.” He motioned Them to the coliseum again. “I suppose, Timeless One, this will be our last meeting.”

They grinned. “Maybe not. I’ll anticipate your arrival into the next life, Doctor Strange.” They turned to leave, but stopped. “Strange.”

“Yes?”

“Do not return to the Dimensions again. What will not be destroyed with me will no longer be under our control. And, make sure that,” They motioned to the medallion still in his hands, “reaches its rightful owner.”

“I will do what is needed, Timeless One.” He bowed out, leaving Them at the edge of the coliseum.

“As will I.” They opened a rift in the Dimension, and without another look, stepped through to a stopping place before They reached Their Hub World.

The Dimensional rift closed completely after They stepped through; any magic that remained now floated in between Dimensions, never to be used again. The Timeless One immediately set to work, gathering supplies as the Dimension They were in begun to crumble underneath the weight up Their spell. The walls to Their small confines broke away, revealing the familiar aurora behind them. The Timeless One needed not much time. Mannon Kiwi Plant, dehydrated. Crust of the Seed of Heavens. Saskatooron fossil. Anova Ebolis. A mutated leaf from a jelly tree. A Japa-

A screeching roar erupted across the Dimensions, shattering much of the ground They were standing on. Vials and potions dropped away into the aurora, crushing harmlessly in between Dimensions. The Timeless One grabbed the rest of Their supplies before they dropped into the abyss and quickly entered Their Home Dimension – The Mountains.

~ ~ ~

The golden glow of the Infinity Gauntlet gleamed with an intense, almost ferocious light as it ripped through an ancient wall, filled with archaic runes. Its wearer held a grin just as ferocious as he towered above the servants around him. His pale, purple skin glowed eerily against the angry shine of the Gauntlet. A match made in heaven, they were, to open the gates of hell.

Thanos sucked in a lungful of air with a childish glee. “She’s here. Find The Timeless One.” The servants chittered and shuffled around, glancing at the hole in the wall warily. Thanos growled, “Now!” They rushed into the hole, sniffing the walls with acute apprehension and splitting off. The Mountain was filled with narrow walkways and corridors. It was built as a maze with connections to every Dimension.

“Her stench covers this place. Those animals won’t find her, even if they were trying.” A maroon skinned woman stepped through the hole, distaste scrawled across her rough face. Pulling her hair back into a tight ponytail, she grimaced. “This would go along a lot faster if I burnt the place down.”

Thanos stepped forth, blasting through as he went. “She knows more about the Stones than anyone alive. Besides forces who even I would not barter with.” He flexed the Gauntlet and clapped her shoulder. “That’s why we silence her first. I want to see her blood coat these halls before this Mountain is destroyed. And, if possible,” with a flick of his right, ungloved hand, he cleared the debris from the wall, “the Dimensions can stay intact while all of this happens. Come, Nietta.”

Her skin boiled from his touch, revealing bright coiling magma underneath the rocky top layer. She groaned inwardly. “Yes, Father,” she grumbled.

Together, they bore into the mountain.

~ ~ ~

They could hear the chittering of the Sand-Seekers. They were merely Thanos’ pets, but that meant he was not far behind. Not yet in Their personal quarters, The Timeless One was playing a dangerous game in Their tunnels. As They skirted through passageway after passageway, They could feel Thanos’ presence inch closer and closer to Them. Brushing Their fingers along the rough earthy walls, They felt the length of the mountain. Split in between multiple dimensions, The Timeless One had one last defense up Their sleeve, and the last piece fell into place. Pulsing Their magical reserves into the mountain, they forced the Dimensions to split apart, ripping the mountain into multiple, separating Dimensions. It was only a matter of time before they fell into the abyss.

Wasting no time, They rushed into Their personal quarters and set to their final spell.

With a quick flourish, eight statues came to life and surrounded Them as They got to work in the middle of the room.

~ ~ ~

Nietta groaned as Thanos stopped for the seventh time. “What is it now?” Thanos studied the wall.

“She is close.” Nietta’s skin burned and she rolled her eyes. You said the same thing the last three times we stopped. She pulled out her weapon from its sheath – a khopesh that connected with her skin – just in case, though. Something in his voice was different this time, no matter her thoughts.

Her weapon flared up as he touched the wall with his right palm. “Father, I don’t like this.”

Thanos slammed through the wall with his gloved hand, revealing the hall ahead being ripped apart, falling into a myriad of colors. “She’s separated the Dimensions! She’s trying to trap us.” Ripping off her glove, her hand burst into fire. She punched her way through what was left of the wall. Thanos eyed the rift with impunity. “Father we need to get back to the shi-“

“Hush child.” Thanos pointed to the rift. “If you paid any attention, you would see fault in her magic. It flickers.”

She growled. “So? We have bigger things to worry about than criticizing her work!”

“Foolish girl, this is our road to her.” Stepping close to the rift, he ran his hand along it. “Oh, Timeless One, your magic is rushed.” The ground they stood on trembled against the closing Dimension.

“Father, whatever you’re going to do, you better do it now.”

Thanos timed the Gauntlet with the beat, and shoved it through. The aurora sparked and groaned against the metal of the Gauntlet. Thanos pushed the glove further into the rift, splitting it open. “Timeless One, your best-laid plan has one hole in it.” The Gauntlet gleamed with a golden ferocity and the rift shuddered against the might of its power. “Me.”

The rift closed on itself, allowing just enough time for Thanos and Nietta to step through. They came across a circular room with a hunched figure in the middle of it. Eight stone beings sprang into action and launched themselves at Thanos. He blasted them away with one flick of the wrist and they shattered against the far wall, crumbling into piles of harmless dirt.

Thanos grinned wildly and held out his Gauntlet. “The Timeless One, choose your next words carefully if you value the last moments of your life.”

~ ~ ~

The wall behind The Timeless One exploded, sending shrapnel flying into the room. The mountain groaned under the stress of the Dimensions caving in on themselves. As the stone guardians distracted Thanos, They had enough time to set the last pieces of Their spell into place, stuffing what They needed into Their hands. They didn’t move after the commotion settled, holding Their breath as the heavy footfall of the Mad Titan entered the chamber fully. They heard his gravelly voice start slowly. “The Timeless One, choose your next words carefully if you value the last moments of your life.”

They exhaled slowly, collecting Their thoughts. Thanos, if anything, was a conductor of death. He drew out his killings dramatically, for his amusement. What he did not know was that They were buying time as well. They rose, keeping Their back to Thanos for the time being. At last, They spoke softly, “To what do I owe the pleasure, Thanos? And Nietta.”

“Don’t play games with me.” The ground rumbled. “Where’s the stone?”

“Wait a minute, she has a Stone? That’s why we’re here?” Nietta’s weapon lit on fire and she turned Them around, holding it close to their throat. “I ought to kill you right now!”

With cold calmness, They stared at Thanos. “Muzzle your bitch, Thanos, and we’ll talk.” Nietta screamed an indistinguishable sound and raised her weapon. Thanos grabbed her wrist.

“The Stone, Timeless One. You have ten seconds before these walls will forever be covered with the taint of your blood.”

One. They nodded.  "Fine."

Two. Their hands twitched, opening up.

Three. They dodged Nietta’s attack.

Four. The relics fell from their hand.

Five. Thanos forced Them back.

Six. The walls collapsed.

Seven. The Timeless One’s face elongated, beginning Their last spell.

Eight. The relics hit the ground.

Nine. Thanos impaled Them with a golden spear.

Ten. The Timeless One’s screams echoed through the mountain, forcing Thanos and his forces out of the mountain, killing his servants. The spear dissipated from Their stomach, allowing blood to spill out. The crawled to the relics on the floor. Six idols for six stones.

~ ~ ~

Thanos gazed at the broken mountain, tapping a gloved finger on the arm of his throne chair.

“Thanos, the Almighty.” A cloaked figure knelt in front of him. “The mountain is imploding as we speak. We are unable to retrieve the whereabouts of The Time-“

“Destroy it.”

“Pardon?”

Thanos slammed his fist down. “Destroy it all! Leave nothing intact.” The figure nodded hastily and backed away. He leaned back in the throne, a mischievous grin crawling back onto his face. “No matter, the Dimensions are mine to control.”

~ ~ ~

“Power, Time, Soul, Reality, Space, and Mind. Discord, isolation, separation. Let no two stones lay in Thanos’ hands.” The Timeless One rattled in their last, cold breath.

The mountain shattered under the might of Thanos’ fleet. The Timeless one closed Their eyes as the eight relics burned away. One last sigh escaped Their mouth as their body was wiped from existence.

The Timeless One let go and finally greeted Death with open arms and weary eyes.   


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Thu Feb 25, 2016 10:04 pm
Virgil wrote a review...



This is Yams here for a review!

I'm going to get on with my main issue that I noticed first. Your way of description and vocabulary you use, doesn't really fit Marvel in my opinion. This feels dark and eerie, but should it? Sure, it has to do with Thanos and space and Death and all that, but does it fit the story or Marvel? Is that what you're going for?

So you decided to add in your own characters with this. The constant Theys and Theirs are kind of annoying, especially with the capitalization, but I guess it suits the Timeless One. How will the Timeless One connect into the Marvel Cinematic Universe? It'd be odd if they didn't have a history or backstory, as you're fitting them into it, and they didn't just pop out of nowhere.

I'm trying to stay away from the comics but Thanos has a daughter called Nebula in the comics. xD. I suck.

Anyways, the characters you added in are nice. They're good.

This is probably just from my skimming, but I think you should describe more where they are? Are they on Earth? In Space? I don't think it's explained where they are.

Have a great day and I'm sorry for the sucky review!




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Sat Feb 13, 2016 5:37 pm
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Lightsong wrote a review...



Hey, I'm here to review as reminded. :P

When I first read the note, I thought it was another fanfiction about another mainstream Marvel characters, but I was pleasantly surprised by the characters you introduced. I have to say, it's really interesting because I don't know these characters, and is fascinated by the way you handle them in this chapter. The Timeless One is the most intriguing one, as wells as the six characters you would definitely introduced later. The villain, Thanos, is also a fresh character I'm yet to understand, and Nietta and Doctor Strange are another cool additions to the novel.

One of the thing I notice is the minor inconsistent of the use of capitalized 'they' in the story. Some are capitalized, while some not. I'm also curious as to why it's capitalized. Certainly the reader can recognize 'they' referred to the Timeless One. I'm not sure. I'm just iffy with capitalizing pronouns unless it's as prominent as 'God' or something. Also, it's interesting to note Thanos refers Timeless One as 'her'.

You should be careful with your wording. Sometimes it sends the wrong meaning, such as this...

The figure rose, letting the cloak fall from their figure.


... which I interpret as Timeless One being naked, since there's no further descriptions about the clothes they wear. Also, other times, there are repetitive words, and one of them is obvious from the beginning, such as this...

The cavern rumbled again, sending dust pouring again.


... which is fine if your drop either 'again'. You have an issue on dialogue too.

“Timeless One, we are graced with your presence.” The Timeless One nodded Their acknowledgement. He cleared his throat. “Perhaps we should talk someplace more private. If you would, my tent is not far.” They nodded, and he led the way.


When I read this, I just find that all of these are scattered in one paragraph. The Timeless One's action should be separated in its own paragraph, while Strange word's in another. It would be like this:

“Timeless One, we are graced with your presence.”

The Timeless One nodded Their acknowledgement.

He cleared his throat. “Perhaps we should talk someplace more private. If you would, my tent is not far.”

They nodded, and he led the way.


Of course, the dialogue seems a bit one-liner right now, so it's okay to add a little bit more body language and facial descriptions.

With cold calmness, They stared at Thanos. “Muzzle your bitch, Thanos, and we’ll talk.” Nietta screamed an indistinguishable sound and raised her weapon. Thanos grabbed her wrist.


My favourite line so far! xD It speaks volume about the Timeless One's character which I didn't see coming, and has just enough pointedness to keep one engaged in reading it.

I pretty much like everything about this prologue. It saddens me the Timeless One dies, but I guess that's inevitable. I'm not sure if they have one or two stones, though? From the way they speak with Strange, they only have one. But then there's further mention of Dimension, and Thanos claims to have it, which means he got it from Timeless One, which meant they actually have two? I dunno, it's pretty much not clear to me.

I guess after this we'd be introduced with new characters. I see a prologue as something separate from other chapters, and would be later explained throughout the novel. However, I think this one is neiher. The reason I pretty much says this is because, while obviously new characters are going to rule the novel afterwards, this one seems like a flashback, or like something that would be made faster in time afterwards. It's not explained either because it does that in itself alone.

Brandon Sanderson's The Way of Kings started this way too, a time long ago before the current one, but in there, there seems nothing to explain about the situation, and we are put to wait for the scenario to be explained. I think it'd be rather interesting, and something for the readers to wonder on, if the chapter is made vaguer without any direct explanation given to its necessity to the novel and needs to be explained later on. This is my suggestion, though.

And that is all! I hope we can see more interesting character like Timeless One, and I'm hoping Strange to be it later, because he seems to play a huge role in this novel. Either way, keep up the good job! :D




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Fri Feb 12, 2016 2:03 pm
Lightsong says...



Remind me to review this later.




Virgil says...


Hey Lightsong I'm reminding you now to review this later so you can do it later and remember now ;3



Lightsong says...


Alright. I'll remember now to do it later. ;3




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