Mama

Mama is good!

Mama is great!

On my birthday,

I get to much cake!

.

My family is big,

they're all so tall!

Big brother says

it's cause I'm so small.

.

We left daddy,

I'm sure I'll see him soon,

but for now I'll be with grandma

who gave me a great big room!

.

We've moved several times

and are now back home,

where masquitoes bite

and at school I'm all alone.

.

I had some friends,

before we moved here

but now their all bullies

that I try not to show tears.

.

Grandma laughs,

mama gets mad,

and together they hug me

so that I'm no longer sad.

.

We moved again,

back were we just were,

it's so sunny and bright outside

when I'm with her.

.

You make me so happy

and my mom loves you too.

you is older and wiser

and will "fight just for you."

.

That's what she said,

and exactly what she did,

so while others said I smelled

she said their just kids.

.

Our mom's get on well

so she always let's me stay,

while mom is at the hospital

or just needs some time away.

.

Mom is good,

she's still great.

She kisses me goodnight

every night to date.

.

We've moved twice more now

back to Colorado

for no rhyme or reason.

It's what they say so...

.

I made some friends

for the first time in years

since my older friend watched me go

both of us in tears.

.

These friends are all nice

each one just like me.

All picked on once and strong now

each with mothers that love me.

.

Grandma is sick,

but says she'll be fine,

so then why is it,

that mama is crying?

.

We had a small fight

over your hospital bed,

the next morning, you're gone

mind clear in your head.

.

Mom is good.

Mom is great.

Can't you see

she has enough on her plate.

.

Please don't be rude,

or else she will cry

then my my brother will yell

and she'll say she wants to die.

.

I know it's not true,

she only tried once...

maybe twice, no three-

but she's stops each time we confront

.

the fact that she's scared,

cause we are too,

grandma is gone

she was a mom to us too.

.

That doesn't mean we hate you

or want you to die,

We'd like if you drank less

so mom, would you try?

.

"My mom is good...

Yes, she's doing great.

There food in the house

and our rent's up to date."

.

But my brother is gone

and that is all lies.

Our fridge is so empty

and we're three months behind.

.

I haven't talked to my brother

in the several months since he left

pushed from the state

with juvie as a threat.

.

My mom is bipolar.

Not really, but that's easy to explain

to the people who check up me,

rather than a drug adled brain.

.

I just say she's forgetful,

sometime too mean,

she's never hurt me

of that her conscience is clean.

.

What she does is her business,

I get food at school,

so that money that vanishes

seems not to concern you.

.

My shirt doesn't quite fit

and most my pants are a little too small,

but the day you say we'll get some more

there is no money at all.

.

But don't worry, we're fine.

I usually eat three times a day

when we still have food stamps

which are gone by the end of twenty days.

.

They feeds me once a day,

and they feed mom three times,

and they feed all of her friends

each time they come by.

.

Mom is good.

Mom is great.

We're both getting by,

we're not in a bad state.

.

The smell is bitter,

the smell is cloying.

It's why I'm always at Hunter's

instead choking, eyes pouring

.

with tears of regret,

that I can't really help us

get someplace better

without so much fuss.

.

I haven't heard "I love you"

in such a long time,

probably months, feels like years,

sense I felt worth more than a dime.

.

They found out last night,

how bad it had gotten.

I failed you mother,

like you fail me. You're rotten.

.

No, you're not.

That's not what I meant.

I'm sure that's what you hear

but I can't call you just yet.

.

Now I'm safe with my aunt

in Northern Michigan,

away with my stories,

laughing again.

.

It's not like I stopped,

but it had been a while

since I had been happy for so long

no frowns for miles.

.

Are you good?

You said you're doing great

the last time that we spoke.

I love you, okay?