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Canary word: Present
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Original Text:
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I'm not surprised a 16 year old can achieve this fine peice of writing
Don't take that comment too seriously J Hippy... It was good indeed, quite subtle, but as you read on the 'subject' is revealed... Good job! 
I forgot I read this... but Good job once again! Yeah I think I found her face close up on google but there is another one in ANIME on the proule gallary thingy
OMG!!! My sister too!!! She's a member and she's only 11 ...
Thank you for putting the age warning ... I hope Happy Lizard takes notice if hse sees it ...
I think that first person, persent tense can be very annoying. But, it's OK for a short piece like this. Maybe keep that in mind if you want to turn it into something longer though.
Yes I think you should put an age plus for this. But I agree with the others, it's amazing!!!!^_^
'scalled google.
Yeah, add an age warning. Eek. I would NOT want my 11-year-old sister reading that... but it was really good. Very poetic, and full of excellent, dark descriptions. I'm impressed.
Hey this is really good except you do need to consider that younger kids read this...By the way where did you find that picture of rikku Black Rose???
Cheers guys, I think it may be part of something larger one day.
j hippy - i think that this was really really good. very descriptive and poetic. i hope that you consider doing more with it because i think it has the potential to go even further. i can't believe you are only 16! what will you be writing when you're an old hag like me!
good and descriptive, but in my opinion very, very weird. i suggest putting some age #+ to warn other and younger readers of the contents of this story.
please consider the warning signs 
OMG J HIPPY!! I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!!

Nice... and yes, please put some pants on
Put some pants on please.
It is a new perspective on Sirens, but really is too short to qualify as a story.