"Scarred"

Do you hear that? that's the sound of my heart breaking into millions of pieces. This. Was. Absolutely. Heartbreaking... and I loved it all. Poems like this, that convey the emotion and the distress behind abandonment...its almost a relief that there are other people in the world that feel like this.

My all my friends have asked me at one point "whats your greatest fear?". Every time when I respond with abandonment or dying alone they become awkward and don't know what to say. they think I'm being ridiculous.

That's what these poems are for right? to vent your feelings and other people finding comfort in the fact that there are other people like them.

I loved this and I wouldn't change a thing. keep writing my dude

It’s me again! This was sad, but it’s accurate towards feelings of what others think of you. Although you say you may not care if people don’t like you, it comes back to haunt you. Words hurt. A lot. The best part of this poem is that you used large and powerful words to make a lasting impact on the reader!

Hi. This is Kman134. I'm here to review your work.

I can feel your pain and understand how when others use us or take advantage of our feelings, they either don't care or are blind by how they severely hurt us. the sense of sadness and agony seeps out really well in each stanza. the tears and sorrow reflects each line. lastly, the use of rhyming really amplifies the poem really well and that the reader can feel such anguish.

"The doors are open. You can leave or stay."

Two sentences I habitually say

Unfortunately, everyone walked out of my life

Piercing my soul with a concealed knife"

the feeling of a lover kicking one out is like a series of pins stabbing a heart. it makes one question whether it was true love or if he/she was using us for his/her own selfish desire to satisfy his/her lust. however, that doesn't mean one should let the pain shroud over us. as the great Friedrich Nietzsche once said: "That which does not kill us, makes us stronger". that means that no matter what form of emotional turmoil inflicts upon us, we must become resilient and grow a thicker shell when the world tries to trample us once again.

this was a really good poem. I hope to read more from you.

Thanks for sharing this poem expressing the deep pain felt when others trample our feelings and seem not to realize just how deeply they are hurting us. The meter goes well with the sadness of the emotion. Each line is similar to a sob or a groan. Also the choosing to write it in rhyming couplet's is nice. As for lack of punctuation, it really didn't prevent me from understanding the poem or interfere with the flow or meter as it does sometimes in other poems. So it should be perceived as an acceptable stylistic choice.

Here are some suggestions I hope might prove useful in making the poem even better.

Buckets of tears as we silently listen and a jubilant facade contradict each other. The facade is a front that HIDES. It is like a mask.


The capitalization of the first letter of each new line did make me pause sometimes.
So if it were my poem I would not use it.

Couplets

Once we start rhyming couplets the reader will expect us to continue and will feel that we failed if we don't. So the second couplet of the first stanza needs to be rhymed.