Don't come to KY now

Don't come here now for sunshine and warmth.
Don't come here now for good cheer round the hearth.

I advise to steer clear of this whole campus.
The professors have driven the students to madness.

Finals are here.
Awful weather joins to.

My advice to you.
Don't come round here now.

I know this doesn't all ryhme but this is what it's like in Midway College right now!!

Comments & reviews · 7
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Snoink
Review
Snoink wrote a review · Wed Mar 05, 2008 7:45 am

Don't come here now for sunshine and warmth.
Don't come here now for good cheer round the hearth. <--- I would delete this stanza, because it really doesn't add a lot to the poem.

I advise to steer clear of this whole campus. <--- I like how long and convoluted it sounds! Very academia like, though I think you can overexaggerate this and make it even better.
The professors have driven the students to madness. <-- Explain how.

Finals are here.
Awful weather joins to. <--- Edit your post so it says "too." ;)

My advice to you. <--- Put a colon where there is a period.
Don't come round here now.

Funny stuff! :D

Cute little ditty, but not a poem. Better luck in future endeavours.

User avatar
CK Lynn
Comment

Interesting. I liked it, though I would advise to make it a smidgin longer, I didn't feel as if it had an end.

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A.O. Avalon
Comment

No worries. It was funny, it made me smile (the poem I mean).

And as for rhyming...I think you'll find a considerable number of people on this sight who will like it more because it DOESN'T rhyme.

User avatar
InnerTurmoil
Comment

sorry i tend to type really fast so i leave out or add letters sometimes :oops:

User avatar
A.O. Avalon
Review

One little thing:

Awful weather joins to.


"To" should be "too".

It could be a little longer. Maybe you could describe why you hate finals?

Gala and I have finals week every 3 weeks, so we don't have quite the same situation as you guys... ah, the mixed blessing of One-Course-At-A-Time.

User avatar
Nate
Review
Nate wrote a review · Thu Dec 09, 2004 7:58 pm

A fitting poem for the time :)

It hasn't gotten quite that bad yet on my campus, but it soon will be. Finals begin on Monday, but that sense of anxiousness and apprehension has not yet permeated the air. By Saturday, I'm certain my campus will be dead as everyone retreats to suffocating cubicles in rooms caked with dust.



The idea that a poem was a made thing stayed with me, and I decided then that I wanted to be an artist, not just a diarist. So I put myself through a kind of apprenticeship in writing poetry, and I understood even then that my practice as a poet was deeply related to my reading.
— Edward Hirsch