18+ Language Violence Mature Content

Zodiac enter the fight

Warning: This work has been rated 18+ for language, violence, and mature content.

Chapter 5

Bain and Igtytous were going at each other with everything they had. Moving at high speeds, trying to kill each other. Igtytous reappeared first to the naked eye. He summoned two fire balls. One in his right hand the other in the left. He threw both of in opposite directions. The two fireballs stretched outward at first but then curved in as they smacked into each other and made a mini explosion in the air. A smoke cloud sat there and for the naked eye it look like his fireballs hit nothing. But a few seconds later Bain fell out of the smoke cloud and landed onto a car.

Igtytous quickly moved as he leaped in air and took his sword out.

“Bain!” Deception yelled.

Bain eyes open and he managed to roll out the way of the attack.

Igtytous blade got stuck in the roof of the car. Bain swung his blade once as a screech came across the land. The sound was so powerful it made the car fold in on its self with Igtytous inside it.

Wächter Verlorene Liebe floated down to where Bain was. Bain mouth began to move.

“What?! No Bain I am not leaving you here.” Deception fussed back.

Bain mouth move once more.

“Bain I said no!”

Bain then cut his eyes to the sky as he looked at Wächter Verlorene Liebe. Wächter Verlorene Liebe took a deep breath before looking at Deception.

“Wächter Verlorene Liebe, I swear to god if you take me away from here-”

“I am Sorry my lady, but my master has given me his orders so I must take you away.” Wächter Verlorene Liebe then flapped his wings once as he disappeared from sight. A few seconds later the balled up car exploded as Igtytous emerged from the flames. He cracked his neck a couple of times.

Bain mouth moved and Igtytous looked at him for a moment. He then turned to Percy. He walked over to Percy who began to panic.

“Hey what are you doing we are on the same team.” He quickly went to pick up his blade but before he could get it Igtytous red tale wrapped around Percy and picked him up. He then brought him close to his face.

“The kid said he won’t fight until you are clear from any danger.”

“Wait are you saying you want me to leave you here to fight him alone? You will die.”

“Well see there are two things that are wrong with your statement. One I wasn’t asking you shit I was telling you, you are leaving and if you come back I will kill you my damn self. And two who’s going to kill me? If you think I can’t hold my own in fight then I deserve death. Now skedaddle, before I get pissed off and use your skin as a new rug in my room in Gahanna.”

Igtytous then let Percy go and Percy grabbed his sword.

“I will stay out your way but if the fight begins to look like you will lose I will not hesitate to hop into the fight.”

Percy then took off. Igtytous and Bain exchanged looks before going back at it. After a few minutes though Bain was able to find an opening in Igtytous defense and stabbed him in his left shoulder blade. Igtytous yelled out in pain as he grabbed Bain by his hand. He summoned a red fire ball to his hand as he delivered a mean right to Bain’s face. It sent Bain flying as he crashed into a car. Igtytous then with all his might began to pull the blade out his shoulder. But once he had touched the blade he could hear an intense sound that surged through his ears. Blood began to flow from his ears as he continuously pulled the blade out of his shoulder. He then stabbed it into the ground and began to breath heavy. That’s when Bain came back with his fist cocked back.

“Oh shit.” Igtytous thought as he watched Bain come at him. He put up his guard and was ready to block when out of nowhere a fury goldish/orangish colored hand and came caught Bain fist. Igtytous then felt some grab him.

“Leo now!” A voice commanded. It took Igtytous to realize he wasn’t on the ground any more but on top of a building.

Igtytous eyes connect with the soft brown eyes of another being. When Igtytous stood he walked over to the being.

“Jesus?”

“Yes that is my name.”

“Wow, they didn’t lie you look just like my father.”

Right then loud booms serge threw the city. Igtytous looked and was about to jumped down there to help the being out with Bain when Jesus grabbed him by his shoulder.

“Don’t worry about it. Leo will be fine besides, you are hurt.”

Jesus took both his hand over Igtytous body. “Miracle arte: Healing hands.”

Igtytous After a few seconds Leo appeared with Percy in his arms.

“Jesus!” Percy yelled as his eyes landed on Jesus.

Jesus removed his hands and Igtytous entire body was healed. He stood up and balled up his fist a couple of times.

“You feel better?” Jesus asked as he smiled.

Igtytous just looked back. Jesus collapse backwards breathing hard.

“What you do fowl creature?” Percy asked as he slid under Jesus to catch him.

“Shut up, I did nothing. Jesus used the forbidden Miracle artes. That alone will make him weak, but he used it on a demon that is of opposite him.”

“He’s right Percy he done nothing wrong. I chose to do it.”

“But Jesus.”

Igtytous then bit his thumb and drew his demonic symbol in the palm of his hand. “Now spark a light, pharaoh.”

A little red fireball shot out of Igtytous hand and then exploded in the air.

“Leo right?”

The creature in the hood then came and stood beside Igtytous.

“Me and you will have to finish this fight. Jesus is no good to us and Bain obviously do not want Percy in harm’s way.”

“Then allow me to fight alongside with ya’ll he won’t hurt me and that might be his biggest down fall.” Percy said as he stood up.

“See there you go inserting yourself into a situation that anit got shit to do with you. Look you are going to stay here with Jesus.” Igtytous answered back.

“But-”

“Are you dumb? Or just stupid?” Igtytous asked as his breath briskly cut the air.

Percy looked down and stayed quiet.

“He won’t attack you, but will attack Jesus. This means he will kill him unless there is a reason here for him not to do. Secondly let’s say you do join the fight and Bain accidently kill you? That might drive him off the deep end and then all of us including god maybe might die. Supernatural shit is hard enough to deal with, but supernatural shit that is pissed off, that might be enough power to kill a god. After all he is title as the strongest Angle in the world. Not even my father is fucking with kid. So, let’s not piss him off, because He is already a hand full at this level, ok?” Igtytous explained.

Percy nodded. “But what if something happens and I can’t save me and Jesus?”

“Don’t worry, Pharaoh will protect you two from that event.”

“Pharaoh?” Percy asked.

Right then he felt a sharp peck to his leg.

“Ouch!” He sang.

He looked down and seen a little bird like creature standing there. It was only 4 inches tall with bright orange feathers on its head. Its beak was the same color as its body, a bloody red color. Its tale was like a demon tale and was also a bloody red color.

“Pharaoh, protect them.” Igtytous ordered.

“Cheep, cheep!” Pharaoh answered back as it put its wing up to its eye. It was almost like it was saluting Igtytous. Pharaoh then dropped its wing and began to march back and forth in front of Jesus and Percy.

“What? This little guy, what is he gonna protect?” Percy asked.

Igtytous just smiled and shrugged his shoulders as him and Leo jumped off the building. Igtytous gripped his blade’s handle.

“Now start a fire, Kasai no bagu.” Igtytous then unsheathe his blade and tossed it up in the air. Red flames swarmed around his body.

Leo landed on the ground first. Him and Bain exchanged looks before Bain quickly moved towards Leo. He swung his blade. Leo dodged it but quickly grabbed his ears as a screeching sound boomed through his ears. Bain then took his blade and stabbed Leo in his shoulder with it. Leo roared out in pain as all he could hear nothing but loud pitch screaming in his ear.

Igtytous now in his second form appeared as he grabbed Bain by his face and sent him flying into a skyscraper. Igtytous then sent over a 100 fireballs in Bain’s Direction before summoning a huge fireball. He threw it and abolished the building which Bain was in. Breathing heavy he looked just looked for a minute and waited to see any sign of life. Once he was convinced that Bain was dead. He began to walk away.

“Are you okay?” Igtytous asked Leo.

“Yeah I am good.” Leo answered back as he coughed up blood. Igtytous put Leo’s arm around his neck and he help Leo to his feet. They began to walk away when they heard a soft humming sound.

Igtytous and Leo both turned to a crying angel who hovered in the air. She had long white hair, and pale white skin. She had on a long white dress and a thrown crown on her head. She was crying and her hands where together as if she was praying.

Bain then appeared out of the dust that filled the air. His mouth moved as a giant silver circle appeared in front of him. The ground began to shake as a giant creature of stone came from underneath the city. It had blue eyes and no mouth. It was 200 feet tall and it had a giant stone lance.

“What in the heavens is that?” Igtytous asked as he and Leo looked in disbelief.

“Oh god help them both, for they nor anyone in Nirvana ever knew that Bain had mastered sir Michel ultimate angelic move: ‘Guardian Summoning, Alcander, the stone Guardian.” Percy prayed as he held the weaken Jesus.

The stone creature roared once and shook the entire city as its angel wings appeared on its back.

Meanwhile back at the farm…………………………………

“Demonic arte: Mind of mater, wind!” Azulo said as nasty winds began to pick up. Queen Titian moved quickly across the snow running from Azulo when, “You just ran into my trap, ‘Demonic arte: Dancing flames.’” Sun Mungu Mtoto announced as he snapped his fingers. Azulo came over and used his wind to trap the flames so they wouldn’t escape.

Once the flames disappeared, you could see queen titan just standing there. Her body was unharmed but her clothes were burned off her.

“Oh god, eww!” Azulo shrieked. “Her body is disgusting.”

“”Disgusting where?” Sun Mungu Mtoto asked. Queen Titian had nice a perky breast with nipples the size of silver dollars. They were a bright pink color and her waist was small but her booty was very large and did no sag nor have cellulite.

“I mean look at her, her butt is too big, her breast to perky, and I hate the color pink.” Azulo answered.

“Look Azulo I know you prefer wood peckers over hidden valleys but come on you telling me you don’t find her attractive?” Sun Mungu Mtoto asked.

“Not in the least.” Azulo answered truthfully.

Queen Titian lifted her arms and said, “Tatin magic god slasher. In a blink of an eye both Azulo and Sun Mungu Mtoto both where bleeding crazy as they body floated in the air. Azulo body hit the ground first, but when Sun Mungu Mtoto body had hit the ground it became ash.

Queen Titian looked at the pile of ash before speaking. “Phoenix ash………That was Pharaoh’s favorite move. It got him out of any bind and that is why he was the most feared human there was, but you should already know that since you are his son. I expect nothing less from the world’s strongest human son.

Right then without turning her head titian put up hand and blocked Bez punch with her hand. Arm’s never flinched nor did her body move. But the impact from her open palm block against Bez close fist punch was so loud it knocked leaves out of all the trees with in a 30 feet radius. Her hand was bleeding crazy like before she pushed Bez back with her hurt hand. Bez went sliding a couple feet back.

Queen Titian then looked at her hand. She saw that she had four puncture wholes in her hand. She then looked up and seen Bez hand had transformed. It was covered in ice and his knuckles hand icy spikes going across it.

“That’s his demonic arte: mind over matter, element equip. This allows his body to change into whatever element he touches. Pretty unique ability but that’s my Bezzy Boo for you. He always find a way to impress you.

Queen Titian then turned and seen Azulo standing there. The slash mark that was going across his body began to fade. She notice that the ice from the ground was being used to heal his body.

“Oh and this is just another demonic arte I have. Me and Bez in fact can use it. It’s called mind of matter, supernatural healing. This allows us to us natural things, like water, dirt, leaves, or anything that can happen on earth; we can use and heal our bodies. The only down side to this ability is once we choose our natural healer then we have to stick with it for 24 hours. So I chose Ice, so if it was to disappear then I would be screwed, but I don’t have to worry about that since your son gave me all this nice snowy weather we have.

“So I see…… in that case I should go ahead and show ya’ll how insignificant you worms really are.” Queen Titian said as her body began to have a flash gold color around her body. “This is where you all die at. Welcome to your grave, this is what hell really looks like.”

A couple miles away from the farm…………………………………………………

“Argh!” A snow clone yelled as he charged Vangoe. Vangoe dodged it.

“Demonic arte: Dark blade.” He then yanked down through the air and a black sword appeared in his hand as he swung it and destroyed the snow clone. He then looked around and seen he was surround by a lot of snow clones. He quickly moved and started to take out the snow clones with ease.

“Master Prince Titian.” A snow clone said as he appeared before Prince Titian.

“Yes what is it?” He asked the snow clone.

“Sir I am sorry to announced that we aren’t penetrating his defense faster.”

“Ha! Penetrate his defense faster? Just who the hell do you think we are fighting? This is not just a regular demon we are fighting here. Now if it been someone like Satan Jr.’s siblings, or even lower then yeah I would be piss, but this is Vangoe. He is the top of the top in the Devils army. I do not expect him to lose at the hand of such a weak arte I decided to use.”

“But sir if you knew we were no match for him, then why? Why use us and not use a stronger arte?”

“Because, I needed you all to expose a flaw in his defense.”

“But sir I told you there is no weakness he has. Ever since his eyes changed, we can barely hit him. In fact the time we are able to get a decent hit on him is from behind.”

“Eureka! You are a genius!” Prince Titian praised the snow clone as he began to walk down an Icy stair case that he created to lead to a throne that he also created.

By time he reached the bottom Vangoe had just killed the final snow clone.

He clapped and Vangoe glare was fixed on him. “Great job, you are one of the few people I know who survive my 100,000 clone assault, but then again you are the infamous black reaper. It would have been very disappointing if you have lost to such a weak arte.”

Vangoe eyes never lifted off of the Prince who drew his blade. “But know you have to deal with the real thing, and I assure you my clones are only 1/5 of my true strength.”

In a blink of an eye Vangoe was already in front of the prince and with one slash cut him down.

“It seemed easy enough.” Vangoe said as he watched Prince Titian body hit the ground.

He then turn, and skewed himself onto a blade. He coughed up blood as his eyes landed on Prince Titian.

“Oops, did I forget to mention my ability over snow and ice. You see as long as there is ice or snow around my body I can reincarnate myself. Neat huh?” Prince Titian explained.

Vangoe was breathing hard as his eyes were fixated on Prince Titian as blood continuously ran down his chin.

“Oh I am guessing you wanna know how I was able to stab you huh? Well honestly my friend it was my clone. You see I thought you were flawless without a weakness but then he said ‘In fact the time we are able to get a decent hit on him is from behind.’ I knew right then that your eyes are only effective if your opponent is in front of you. So if your opponent is behind you, then you are totally wide open. That’s why you kept running and attacking the clones in front of you then you turn to the ones behind you. Really such a little weakness would be my biggest advantage.”

Prince Titian then ripped his blade out of Vangoe. As he fell down to the ground.

Back a couple of miles the other way Azulo, Bez, and Sun face lit up.

“Vangoe, they all thought.

“You all suck at fighting. Aint you been told never to take you eye off your enemy. Now you all die!” Queen Titian said as she floated in the air.

“Taitan spell: 2000 god slashing power cut.” She began to swing her blade rapidly as she wounded Artza, Azulo, Bez, and Sun real bad. Sending them 2000 god slashers. They all laid there in pain and could not move. Queen Titian laughed madly.

“Look at this bs.” A tall woman with long purple hair and purple lipstick had said as she looked on to the fights from a distance. She was about 6’5 and she had a sword the same length as her body.

“I understand them, but you, Vangoe I expect better from you.” She spoke but stopped and smiled.

Her head turned left just a tad. “Oh okay so I get it now you sly devil you. Well then you will need some cover fire so your plan can work.” Tears ran down the woman face as she took finger of her right hand and picked up a tear drop. She flicked it in the direction on the red, blue, and white reaper. She then picked up the tear on her left cheek with her left hand.

“Well they say that a mermaid’s tear contains luck.” She then flicked it in the black reaper way.

Back over in the forest…………………………………………………………………………

“Arg!” One of the beast clones roared as he tried to attack Reload. She dodge the attack and threw another needle the clone began to disappeared but that’s when two more clones came out of the dead clone body and they both smacked Reload. Reload hit the ground hard as she whimpered.

“Reload!” Explosior yelled as he took off towards his sister. Two clones charged at him. He summoned two green fire balls and threw them at the two clones. But out of the smoke four clones came out an attacked him. He fell and the ground. He tried to get up when a clone jumped on his back.

“Ahh!” Explosior cried out in pain.

“Give it up kid you are at your limit. You won’t be able to beat my titan arte: split cells. You are two weak.”

“Yeah you and your pathetic ass sister.” Another clone mocked as he licked Reload’s face.

“Let her go!” Explosior said.

“Or what?” The clone continued to pick as he groped on Reloads left breast. Reload moan with displeasure.

Meanwhile in a tree a couple of miles away………………………………………

“We need to help.” A girl with pink hair said. She was about 5’5 and had spiral horns coming out her head. Her lower half was ram. She was about to go, when…

“Aries wait!” A girl with blue hair said. She was about the same height as Aries, but she had straight horns that gave her an extra 2 to 3 inches over Aries.”

“Capricorn, if we wait they will die. You can wait but I am going.” Aries said as she was about to go until Capricorn put her hand on Aries shoulder. “Stop looking with your eyes and start using your senses.”

Aries closed her eyes for a second before they popped open. She looked at Capricorn who just looked onto reload and Explosior fight.

“I said let her go!” Explosior barked again.

“Shut up!” the clone on top of Explosior said as he stomped Explosior face into the ground. He continued to stomp Explosior until he was unconscious.

“Explosior!” Reload yelled as she tried to fight her way free. The clone who was holding her elbowed her in the stomach and spit flew out her mouth.

“Oh sweet heart stop struggling please.” The clone who was holding her said. As he forced her to kiss him.

“Yeah we will be gentle as we can.” The clone who was on top of Explosior said as he jumped off of Explosior back. He walked over and began to grab on Reload’s pants.

“No please. Explosior!” She screamed once more. Explosior finger flinched as he finally was able to come to. He was in a dark place just floating.

“Where-where am I?” He asked.

“Well now I can’t allow you to die. Not as long as you are my host.” A dark evil voice echoed.”

“Who was that?” Explosior asked as he looked around.

“Rise!” The dark voice echoed once more. “Raise!” All of a sudden Explosior felt his power increasing by tenfold. His body took on a bright green glow as he began to rise to his feet.

His head finally lifted up and his green eyes landed on the two clones.

“Explos-” Reload started but before she could finished she notice she was in her little brothers arm.

“Are you okay?” he asked as the two clones exploded behind him.

“Ye-yes I am….. Look out!” She screamed as she closed her eyes.

Once she reopened them though she notices that she was okay and Explosior had moved them clean across the field. As the four clones who came to attack them all exploded.

“In-incredible.” Aries praised from a distance.

“No do you see sister. This is why I told you we shouldn’t interfere yet, and what makes him even scarier is that this is him only at 20 maybe 25%. He still has so much power in his reserves its crazy.” Capricorn said as she swallowed hard.

Eight more clones appeared. But did not attack just yet.

“Hey Reload are you able to walk.”

“Yeah.”

“What about run?”

Reload moved her legs back and forth a couple times.

“I do not see why not.” She answered.

“Okay then, I want you to take Zeus and get out of here now.”

“Wait, what? No Explosior I am not going to leave you. Did you forget you are under my demonic arte? If anything you should run. I can hold these guys off while you go…especially now since you just sent me a boat load of energy.”

“Even with that power you won’t be able to hold them off, but I can Reload.”

Reload didn’t say anything as she just closed her eyes to since her brother’s energy. “Wow she thought to herself. His power level is really high. I would say hands down he casts a huge shadow over both me and Viss.”

“Well what if you burn out?” Reload asked.

“I shouldn’t since I am only at about 10 percent.”

Reload, Aries and Capricorn eyes got wide.

“Only……only ten percent?” Capricorn repeated breathlessly.

“No way…..” Aries followed as she and her sister looked on from a distance.

“This is you only at ten percent?” Reload asked.

“Give or take one or two percent.” Explosior answered.

“This is incredible. If this is him at ten percent…..” Reload began to think, “Hey why not go ahead and go all the way to a hundred percent? I mean surely at this state you are there equal but if you go a hundred-”

“That wouldn’t be smart Reload.” Explosior announced to his sister.

She just looked at her brother for a moment.

“The way I feel right now, I am very conformable and can move at will.”

“Okay?” Reload said confusingly.

“Well don’t you find that strange since I am under you Demonic arte?”

Reload eyes widen as she looked at the needle in her brother side.

“Now with that in mind tell me the truth, how does your body feel?”

Reload closed her eyes and notice her body was surging through her.

“I feel real good.” She answered.

“Exactly. At this level me and you are well taken care of, but let’s say I go a hundred percent. True I will have the power to beat these guys, but that’s only if I can control it. Then if you do the math at this state I can fight and hold these guys off until help can arrive, however at a hundred percent it will be like all or nothing for me. I will probably only have like 10 to 15 to beat these guys before I burn out. To be more accurate five to six because of you. At a hundred percent I am sure my power will overload you. That would be bad for you.”

Reload nodded with understanding.

“Now go ahead and get Zeus out of here.”

“But Explosior-”

“Look what did I say……I can keep these guys busy long enough for you to get Zeus out of here. Once you have done that hurry back so we can finish these fools.”

Reload bald up her fist as she accepted her brother’s plea. With a swift step she grabbed Zeus.

“You better not die.” She thought quietly as she looked at her brother one last time.

She took off at high speed with Zeus to get him away from the action.

“Brother, the female demon is getting away.” Canos announced to his brother.

“Oh don’t worry; I have two clones at the edge of the forest waiting on her. She will die.” Kronos laughed.

Reload reached the edge of the forest when two clones popped out from nowhere. “Did you really think we were going to let you escape?” One clone asked

“Now die!” The other clone yelled. That’s when in a blink of an eye Explosior appeared. He touched both clones face mask.

“Did you really think I didn’t know you two were out here?” Explosior asked as he pushed them back towards the ground. He then said “Demonic arte: Organ explosion.” A huge explosion went off as the smoke filled the air.

Reload looked at her brother for a moment longer. “His power is incredible. And even his speed now. Hand down he has surpass even my speed and I was the fastest. It took me exactly 5 minutes to get to the end of the forest, and yet he made it here in a matter of seconds. Have my little brother really surpass all of us?”

“Reload.”

“Um, yes Explosior?”

“Go ahead and get going. Don’t forget to hurry back. I give myself about an hour before I burn out.”

“Of course Explosior I will hurry back.” Reload then to back off and Explosior returned to the middle of the forest.

Back at the church……………………………………………………………………

“Metallic black winds.” Satin Jr. said as he swung Atsuryoku kata. The black flames burned Viss arms as he went sliding backwards on his heels. “Now go Omanga and attack Viss.” Satan Jr. commanded.

Omanga quickly rapped his self around Viss and then bit him on his pressure point in between his neck and his shoulder blade.

“It’s over Viss.” Omanga mumbled with a mouthful of Viss flesh in his mouth.

Viss just smiled. “I am highly offended Omanga. You think this little bit off pressure will be enough to stop me. Viss began to power up as his grew so large it force Omanga to lose his grip. Vis then grabbed Omanga and tossed him at Satan Jr. They both went rolling across the field. Viss then made his way to his brother.

“It ends here brother.” Viss said as he cocked his right hand back. He swung forward but his hand was caught by Jugo’s demonic hand. He then punched him with his other hand and sent him reeling backwards. Jugo then charged and swung at Viss, but Viss just dodge the attack and sent Jugo a sharp left to his rib cage. He herd the bone break as Jugo went sliding back. Viss stood up straight and wiped blood from the left corner of his mouth.

“That makes 20 bones. I have broken 20 of his bones, and 9 of them where rib bones. He should be unable to move and yet he still can, not only that he still giving me a run for my money. Damn, who the hell, or what the hell is this guy?” Viss thought.

“You should go full power.” Jugo answered as he stood up.

“Oh, it talks?” Viss commented.

“Joke all you want but I will kill you without any problem.” Jugo said calmly.

“Is that right?” Viss asked.

“Yes very much so, but you are the first to see my hell raiser arte at full power, for I know that this is the only way I will be able to kill you.” Jugo explained.

Viss chuckled a couple time before answering.

“So you seriously believe you can not only beat me but kill me?”

Jugo did not answer, as he folded his arms.

“Cute. Alright I am gamed, but remembered, you asked for this.” Viss said as he began to unleash his power.

“Argh!!!!!!!!!” He yelled as golden flames shot and spiral around his body.

The ground underneath his feet began to break up as he began to charge up. Gold lighting cracked across the sky as it became dark. The lighting stuck Viss. And then began to circle around his body as his power level kept climbing beyond anybody’s imagination.

“Holy cow……his power, his power just won’t stop. He’s just a bottomless pit of power.” The Zodiac Gemini said.

As Viss powered up everyone could feel it.

Over in the downtown city part……………….

“Wha-what is that?” Leo asked looking in the direction of Viss power.

“Leo look out!” Igtytous yelled.

Leo turned as Alcander, as he lunged forward his lance forward. Leo couldn’t dodge it as the lance was right there in front of him.

The lance crashed into the ground which Leo was standing, and Leo was sure he was dead, but once he came back to reality he realize he was still alive. He smelled blood though and instantly checked himself. Once he found out it won’t him bleeding he looked up and seen blood pouring from Igtytous back.

“Igtyt-”

“I am okay; he just clipped one of my wings.” Igtytous said breathing heavily.

Leo just looked at him in disbelief, just admiring how strong Igtytous was.

“That power level you feel, can you still feel it?” Igtytous asked.

“Yea.” Leo said.

“Good, then it would seem like Viss is done playing and so am I.”

“Did you say, Vi-Viss?”

“Yes my little brother. He is fighting Satan Jr. now.”

“That is Viss. As in the gold flame. The Flame that shows the devils true strength. I haven’t felt nothing this powerful since god’s wrath. Was the Devil really that strong?” Leo thought.

Over near the farm…………………………

“What the hell? Who is that?” The tall woman with purple hair asked. She looked in the direction of Viss, and sensed his tremendous power as it continued to rise.

“Damn it, I want to go see what or who that is but if I leave my Zodiac arte won’t be activated. Shit, all I can do is hope that whoever that is he/she is on our side.” The tall woman with purple lipstick and hair thought. She then closed her eyes. “It feels like Igtytous has raised his power level as well. He is about to eclipse Explosior’s power level soon. Damn these three power levels are incredible. All the same that one energy that is so high, it is coming from the direction in which the Gemini twins are supposed to be. If I am not mistaken they are supposed to be helping the demon Viss. I just hope that they can handle it, because that power is so intense.

Over in the forest……………………………………………..

“So, Viss is going all out huh? And so is Igtytous. Whoa, their power level is on a level of a god. I never knew they were that powerful.” Explosior then opened his eyes as he seen the clones looking around. They could sense the power of both Viss and Igtytous. “Oh don’t worry I will have you all dead before they even make it here.” Explosior said as he took a fighting stance.

“Who, what, how?” Aries asked. Capricorn balled up her fist.

“What the hell is that?” She thought.

“Sis……sis?” Aries asked as she took a trembling hand and touched her sister.

Capricorn just looked at the afraid Aries. “Don’t worry, I will protect you.” Capricorn reinsured her sister. Aries nodded as they watched on.

Back at the church………………

“ARHHHH!!!!!!” Viss continuously yelled as he continuously powered up.

Omanga looked on with fear as he could not even imagine nor comprehend the level of power Viss was unleashing. He looked over to Satan Jr., who was however smiling happily.

“What the hell??? Junior why are smiling don’t you feel Viss’s power, he even surpassed you.

“I know isn’t it exquisite?”

“Exquisite??? Um, not the word that I would use to describe this power.” Omanga answered back.

Satan Jr. just continued to smile. “At this point Viss you will be at the level of our grandfather with power. Very interesting, I always knew you had power but this is beyond limits that even I, father, Igtytous, or any other demon could reach.” Satan Jr. thought to himself.

He then looked over at Jugo who just stood there unfazed by Viss’s power level. “Okay Jugo, this will be your test. You ask for me to set it up and now I have. Satan Jr. Continued to think. He then burst into an uncontrollable laughter that scared Omanga.

“Yes Omanga, do not blink for you are about to witness a fight that may prove better than the bible fight in between God’s Champion, and my father’s champion………… Yes I give you the ultimate destructional power vs. the being that is indestructible. Who will win this heavy weight battle? No one knows, but who cares……because whoever wins this fight will be deemed as a god!”

Viss finally finished powering up and his gold flames circled around him along with lighting. Viss eyes then landed on the unfazed Jugo.

“This is me at full power, spine-chilling isn’t it?” Viss asked.

“Impressive but like I said that’s not going to be nearly enough power. You will die here Viss.” Jugo answered back. He then closed his eyes and that’s when Viss charged him.

“Your mistake, you should never closed your eyes!” He said as he gave Jugo a mean left hand upper cut. It sent his body flying up to the sky.

Viss then jumped up and into the air and gave Jugo a massive combo attack before cocking back once more.

“One more!” Viss said as he delivered one more powerful blow to jugo body. Jugo body was glowing gold as he smacked the ground. A huge explosion happened as a huge golden ray of light spread about 12 feet in each direction.

Viss finally landed and that’s when Satan Jr. clapped. “Wow! If I am not mistaken, that was you infamous moved known as 1500 blows or divine punishment correct? Well let me be the first to say that was executed beautifully, right Omanga?”

Omanga looked at Satan Jr. with a disturb look as Viss began to make his way to his older brother. He grabbed his older brother up in his shirt and growled violently as he held up in the air by the collared of his shirt.

“I am going to enjoy beating you to death.” Viss snarled.

“Well you see there is a problem with that my brother.” Satan Jr. smiled.

“Oh yeah, and what’s that?” Viss question.

“Well you see you remembered how I warned you that my esteemed peer?”

“Look your friend is dead and so are you.” Viss said as he cocked back he went to go swing but his Viss stopped 2 inches in front of Satan Jr.’s face.

“What the???” Viss asked as he looked over his shoulder. He seen a snake wrapped around his hand. It was Byzantine with spots. Its spots color was brilliant Lavender and was all over the snake.

Viss went and swung at the snake but the snake just unwrapped itself and dodged Viss’s attack. Viss swung once more but the snake again dodged his attack. It then bit and clung onto Viss’s neck. It then wrapped its bond around Viss tightly. Viss could not. Satan Jr. just stood there and smile.

“Shevia darling! How are you? Blessed I hope.”

The snake popped its teeth out of Viss’s neck. “I have been lovely. How have you been my Lordship?” Shevia hissed back.

“Well I have been a little better some days but I can’t really complain.” Satan Jr. replied back.

“That is so wonderful.” Shevia hissed. She licked her fangs a couple of times. Satan Jr. could tell she loved the blood that sat on them.

“So I take it that the blood tastes great?” Satan Jr. asked.

“Oh yes my lordship. If I had to say this is third best tasting blood I have ever had.” Shevia answered back.

“Third?” Satan Jr. asked.

“Yes, Omanga is a close second next to you my lordship.” Shevia smiled Omanga backed up some as he seen Shevia looked over to him.

“Well would you like a bite?” Satan Jr. asked.

“Oh could I?” Shevia hissed with glee.

“Sure, me and Omanga don’t mind. In fact Omanga said it turned him on the last time.” Satan Jr. laughed.

“Wait, what?! I never said such a thing!” Omanga exclaimed as he slithered behind Satan Jr. Shevia popped her jaws to open her mouth wider. Satan Jr. just closed and held his neck out for Shevia. Just as Shevia was about to bite down on his neck……

“Shevia quit playing. We have unfinished business to tend to.”

Viss heard the voice as his eyes widen. “No way.” Viss said as he watched Jugo come out of the crater. His body had changed. He body now was Byzantine and his eyes where brilliant lavender. He had two horns sticking out the side of his head. Viss also seen that the snake that holds him was connected to Jugo’s back side.

“But Jugo…… the lordship is offering me a taste of his and that adorable Omanga’s magnificent blood.” Shevia cried back.

“Jugo keep that sick freak away from me.” Omanga hissed from behind the smiling Satan Jr.

“Shevia, I said quit it. You already have a meal wrapped up in yo body anyway.” Jugo said.

“A meal??? No this is more of a snack.” Shevia answered. He breathe hit Viss straight in the nose as it reeked of death and depression. Viss turned his head from the fowl stench.

“How would you like for me to kill him my lordship?” Jugo asked.

“Well I don’t really know yet. I mean he has been a thorn in our side this entire time, so killing him quickly would be the best choice in route…… um, Omanga what do you think?”

“Well with Viss gone the muscle of this entire operation is gone. In fact the only other people at this point that can stop us would probably be Master Vangoe or Igtytous.”

“Oh, well who is master Vangoe fighting?” Satan Jr. asked.

“I want to say queen and Prince Titian.” Omanga answered.

“And Igtytous?”

“I think he is fighting Bain and Deception.”

“Uh huh, so in other words we got a little time to burn?”

“Well yeah you can say that.”

“Very well then Shevia darling go ahead and make him suffer.”

“Oh goodie!” Shevia burst out.

“Now Viss darling I am going to keep it totally honest with you. I am about to have so much fun with you but you are not going to have nearly as much fun with me.” Shevia then squeeze and you could hear Viss right arm break under pressure. Viss gave out a loud scream in pain. It was so loud that both Explosior and Igtytous heard it. 

Comments & reviews · 2
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Hey! Nice fight scene. I like how you described the fight scene in chronological order. A few nitpicks I have:

“Igtytous blade got stuck in the roof of the car.” Since it is Igtytous’ blade, it should be Igtytous’, with the apostrophe after the s. And I think you can add a bit of detail into the sentence. Try, “Igtytous’ blade struck the roof of the car and stayed there. He struggled to wrench it out.”

“Bain swung his blade once as a screech came across the land.” And again, more details. Maybe, “Bain swung his blade. It arched through the air in a flash of silver. Suddenly, a screech rang across the land, metallic and full of rage.”

“What?! No Bain I am not leaving you here.” Deception fussed back. I hate it when people use “?!”. It feels like you are trying to emphasize Deception‘s surprise, but this is a “weak” trick. Add more details.

“I am Sorry my lady…” Sorry is capitalized.

“Hey what are you doing we are on the same team.” Add commas or 3 periods so it doesn’t sound like it was spoken with one breath. “Hey! What are you doing, aren’t we are on the same team here?”

“He quickly went to pick up his blade but before he could get it Igtytous red tale wrapped around Percy and picked him up.” I think tale should be tail, if you are talking about that physical structure. Again, add commas. “He quickly went to pick up his blade, but before he could get it, Igtytous’ red tail wrapped around Percy. He picked him up by the throat.”

“Well see there are two things that are wrong with your statement. One I wasn’t asking you shit I was telling you, you are leaving and if you come back I will kill you my damn self. And two who’s going to kill me? If you think I can’t hold my own in fight then I deserve death. Now skedaddle, before I get pissed off and use your skin as a new rug in my room in Gahanna.” Commas, commas, commas. Even Igtytous needs to stop and breathe.

“I will stay out your way but if the fight begins to look like you will lose I will not hesitate to hop into the fight.” Fight is repetitive here.

“Percy then took off.” How is Percy suppose to know then? “After a few minutes though Bain was able to find an opening in Igtytous defense and stabbed him in his left shoulder blade. Igtytous yelled out in pain as he grabbed Bain by his hand.” Pleeaaassee, commas. Breaathee.

Igtytous then felt some grab him. Erm.. maybe it’s “someone”.

“Wow, they didn’t lie you look just like my father.” Comma. And, “Right then loud booms serge threw the city.” is a weird sentence. Try rephrasing it. “Don’t worry about it. Leo will be fine besides, you are hurt.” Commmaaa between fine and besides please. “What you do fowl creature?” Another funky sentence. Rephrase.

I skipped a few paragraphs here because I think you can figure out the mistakes yourself.

I kept reading and gave up. Overall, I think you have a great story coming along, but it needs a LOT of work. Take some time to let your character breathe. I think you can add some more details. The characters were rather “stiff”. They didn’t sound like they had much freedom of thought and movement. And you don’t need to write, Meanwhile…… Just put 5 of this symbol “~~~~~” or 5 of ***** in the center of the page. That tells the reader that the story is switching perspectives. Read your story out loud. You can catch a lot of errors this way. Also, possessive nouns. Add “ ‘s ”. Or s’ depending on the situation. You can find better explanations online. Also, run your story under a spell check. That should catch a lot of the errors. To be honest, I really think you should read over everything again. You have a great story and a great imagination, but if the reader doesn’t understand the characters, or if your story is too “monotone”, they won’t read it. Keep working and keep writing!

~Greetings from Squirtlepowiee :D

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Zoom
Review
Zoom wrote a review · Fri Jan 06, 2017 12:31 am

Igtytous quickly moved as he leaped in air and took his sword out.


This was rather wordy. Consider omitting the “quickly moved” part and rewording “took his sword out”, as the latter is a weak description of somebody unsheathing a sword.

Igtytous blade got stuck in the roof of the car

Bain mouth began to move.

Bain mouth move once more.


Why are you not showing possession after nouns with ‘s? It should be “Bain’s” mouth. (I skimmed though and this mistake is repeated a lot for some reason).

Bain then cut his eyes to the sky


“Cut” was a strange word choice here, I’m not sure what was intended with this description.

***

I stopped reading this post rather abruptly. I kept finding a lot of typos or words that were missing from the sentence for some reason. I didn't get the impression that you had spent much time proof reading, which didn't encourage me to spend much time reviewing. I know that it's very easy to overlook your own typos due to over-familiarity with the story, however you need to find a way to ensure your writing is coherent prior to exposing it via a public forum.

My advice is to read your writing out loud to yourself - you will discover a lot of errors this way, and also it will help you fine-tune poorly structured sentences and unnatural dialog. You can take this one step further by using a reading aid (Microsoft Word provides one or there are a multitude of websites that offer this software for free). You will essentially hear a robotic voice recite your work back to you. This will help you flush out all the errors and prepare your writing for feedback.

Also I noticed that a lot of the action was stiff and didn't progress in a smooth manner. It was very "character A did this, then character B does that". Go back through and question the importance of each line of action. Ask yourself, "would any meaning be lost if this sentence was removed? Was it necessary to say this?". You might be surprised by how many words you can remove without impacting the story.

From what I did read, I can tell you are very imaginative and enjoy writing complex fight scenes. I'd like to see further posts from you with the above advice in mind.

I hope you find this helpful. I try to keep my feedback as honest as possible so that the writer receives an accurate outside perspective. It's valuable to know what your readers are truly thinking.

I'll watch out for future posts from you.

Zoom



Prometheus, thief of light, giver of light, bound by the gods, must have been a book.
— Mark Z. Danielewski, House of Leaves